Find Me
by MaybeTommorrow
Summary: Five years have passed since the promised day, all is well in the world, however the reappearance of an old face has unrest coursing through the old gang, what effect will this new revelation have? What will it do to Roy? RoyxEnvy and strangeness.
1. Chapter 1

My newest instalment, RoyxEnvy. CRAZY I know. Buuut, I think you'll like it. So anywho, READ REVIEW, make me happy. THANKS!

Find Me

Chapter 1: Return

Major-General Roy Mustang was dozing at his desk when the phone rang, he opened a bleary eye and glared at it before shrugging then snuggling deeper in to his arms, if it was important, whoever it was would call back. He smiled when after the fourth ring it stopped, he was about to fall back to sleep when his door was opened and Major Hawkeye walked in she looked at the man almost in resigned exasperation before saluting.

"Sir, a call for you from an outside line, I think you might want to take it," she said sounding serious, Roy's eyebrows furrowed, who could it be? Not Fullmetal- No, Edward, as the young man insisted. He hadn't been Fullmetal for five years now, and he usually kept in touch merely for lack of anything better to do, but he'd called the other day so it couldn't have been him.

He raised an eyebrow at the Major who gestured to the phone, he picked it up still wondering who it could possibly be.

"This is Mustang," he said into the receiver and heard a voice reply on the other line he didn't recognize.

"_Hello Mr, Mustang, this is Dr. Joseph Shepperd, I need to ask a favor of you_," The man said and Roy blinked. A civilian doctor? What did he want with him? His medical care was provided by the military, so why..?

"And what would that be Dr. Shepperd?" he replied and the doctor sighed tiredly.

"_I need you to confirm the identity of a patient_," He said and Roy looked even more confused, it was getting weirder and weirder.

"Why me?" he asked looking at The Major who was standing idly by watching in mild interest, but Roy knew her better than that, she was just as curious as he was.

"_You're the only person the patient can recall, if you could come by in a few hours it would be appreciated_," the man said and hung up after Roy agreed to go to West Central Hospital within the next hour. He put the phone back in the cradle and leaned back in his chair with a thoughtful frown. Who on earth could the patient possibly be? Maybe a past lover, or a victim? He didn't know but he was most certainly going to find out.

"Well Sir?" Hawkeye asked a tint of curiosity in her voice. And Roy stood then grabbed his great coat.

"They want me to confirm a patient or something," he mumbled, then waved his hand at her, "I'll tell you more when I get back," he said and he could see the woman was about to protest but then she sighed and then looked at him with an almost evil glint in her eye.

"Your work will be waiting at home for you sir," she said and he held back a groan.

"Thank you Major," he mumbled reluctantly before escaping the torturous hell hole he called work.

Roy walked into the front lobby of the hospital and was immediately ushered to an office, he assumed he was recognized by the military uniform. The man in the office stood up at the sight of him and held out his hand, Roy took it and shook it briefly.

"Mr Mustang, I'm Dr. Shepperd, before I let you see the patient I'd like to talk with you about a few things," the man said and Roy nodded.

"Of course," Roy said and the doctor nodded then gestured for him to sit down, Roy did and the doctor took a deep breath.

"This is an interesting case I must say first," he said as introduction before delving right in, "The young man was found four weeks ago in an abandoned warehouse, with no identification and no memories of what happened to him or of who he was, the only thing he could remember was your face," the doctor said and Roy's eyes widened in surprise that was unexpected. "We assume this is due to a close emotional connection he may have had to you, perhaps he looked up to you, a father figure maybe, he does in fact look a little similar, he has black hair and black eyes, ringing any bells?" the doctor asked and Roy shook his head, the other man smiled before standing. "We can go see him now, he must be sleeping now, we don't want to shock him so you can just look at his face first," and Roy nodded as they left the office and headed to the extended stay patient ward.

"You know it's by luck we knew he was talking about you, one of the nurses was present when I was examining him and heard the description he gave, she was rather adamant that 'eyes as dark as pitch' was you," the man gave Roy a look that Roy didn't know whether he should blush at or be smug at. So he settled for looking pleasantly surprised. The doctor shook his head in what Roy was sure was amusement, but he didn't comment.

They came to a stop outside the door and the doctor put a finger to his lips before opening the door, Roy had to strain not to roll his eyes, then he stepped in and had to narrow his eyes to see in the dark, he saw a lump with a head of long black hair under some covers, nicer than normal issued hospital sheets, Roy was trying to think if he knew anyone with long black hair like that but couldn't think of any one. And then the male turned over and Roy's heart stopped, the long hair fell into the boy's pale face, one Roy was very familiar with.

It was Envy.

"Holy..." he breathed and the doctor gestured for him to come back out but Roy was too stunned to notice so the man gently pulled him out by the arm.

"I take from your reaction you know him," He said and Roy nodded then looked at the doctor like he wasn't really seeing him.

"But he should be dead, hell I was there when he died!" Roy ran his hand through his hair, then he realized he didn't have his gloves on him, and he desperately wished he did so he could kill that little... He took a deep breath. No, he had already exacted his revenge. He took another deep breath.

"I believe I do, but it might be better to get a second opinion." he said and the doctor looked curious.

"And from who is that?" he asked and Roy tried not to smirk, boy was this going to be a fun phone call.

Ed groaned miserably as he waited in the front room of the 'Elric Automail' shop, he couldn't stop the smile from coming to his face when he thought that, he and Winry had been married for four years now, had two kids and were happy and well. He was smug and full of pride at having his family, only at the current moment Ed was bored.

Winry was off with the kids at the moment, another thing Ed couldn't help but smile about, Winry was such a good mom, and Ed was supposed to take care of the shop, since he couldn't use alchemy anymore he'd learned about automail, he was nothing compared to Winry and Pinako, but he was okay, he could even do small repairs on his own leg if he needed but he preferred his wife to do it, just so he could get a little attention. He was roused from his thoughts by a small figure climbing up his pants and onto his lap.

"Hey kiddo," he said and brilliant gold looked up at him under a blond head of hair, the little boy beamed.

"Hi Daddy!" the boy chirped and Ed grinned at him then pat his son's head with his right hand.

"What are you doing?" he asked and the little boy, who's eyes widened a little, and began to chew his bottom lip.

"Nothing..." he said in that voice all four year olds use that let's you know they're lying. Ed raised an eyebrow at his son.

"What did you do?" he asked sternly and the little boy looked at him with big innocent eyes Ed knew he'd learned from his Uncle. He raised his eyebrow further and the little boy knew he couldn't get away with it anymore.

"I took a toy from Trisha..." he muttered and Ed sighed, his oldest child was so much like him it was ridiculous.

"Nicholas, you know what Mommy and I said about that. You need to share with your little sister, she's much younger than you she can't understand that yet okay? You need to protect her because she's precious, I protect you because you're precious too. I want you to apologize, will you?" he asked and the little boy nodded, Ed smiled then grabbed his son in a tight hug before kissing him on the forehead. The little boy wrapped his small arms around his father's neck and squeezed.

"Okay little man go say you're sorry," he said and set the boy down on the floor and gave his backside a pat to urge him to go, the boy went, albeit reluctantly.

Ed sighed then leaned back in his chair with somewhat of a groan, his eyes had slipped closed but they opened when he heard the soft chuckle from the doorway, he looked to see his wife leaning against the door frame looking at him with a pleased expression.

"That was handled well, I was sure you were going to let him get away with it when I saw him come running to you," Winry said as she sauntered over to her husband who smiled.

"I would have, if I hadn't done the same thing when I was his age and my dad gave me the same speech," Ed said then grabbed his wife's hand and pulled her onto his lap.

"Oh who would have thought, you took toys from your precious little brother?" she asked mockingly as he pulled her close.

"It happens, where are the kids?" he whispered against her lips and she smiled against his, she put her arms on his shoulders.

"With your precious bro-" she started but was cut off by an abrupt kiss, she moaned happily into it and her eyes slipped closed. She moved further up Ed's lap just as he asked her mouth for entrance and their tongues got acquainted. And it was interrupted just as the phone rang, Ed groaned against his wife's lips, he hadn't been alone with her since before Trisha was born.

"Just let it go," he murmured but she shook her head and reached for it from his lap.

"It might be a customer," she said and Ed groaned then buried his face into her chest, she made an irritated huff and pushed his face away so it was on her shoulder instead.

"Elric Automail!" she trilled and Ed smiled at her enthusiasm, but then he heard her tone drop when the person on the other line introduced themselves. She held the phone to him after a moment, a sour look on her face.

"It's for you, it's the Major-General," she said and Ed blinked, Roy? He'd just talked to the man what could he possibly want. He took the phone from her with a confused look.

"Hey Roy, what's up?" he asked and the other man on the line sighed.

"_Hello Edward, I have a favor to ask of you_," he said and Ed didn't think he sounded all that enthusiastic about it.

"And what might this favor be?" he asked, his free hand was rubbing Winry's hip absentmindedly, though she didn't seem to notice as she was too intent listening to Ed talk to Roy.

"_There seems to have been an...incident and someone turned up, someone from the past_," the man muttered and Ed could tell now the man was either very distracted or very disturbed, he leaned towards the latter.

"Who?" he asked and there was another sigh, Ed sat up straighter when the man muttered something Ed couldn't hear. "Who was it Mustang?" he asked forcefully and Winry got off of him looking concerned.

"_Envy_," Roy said and Ed almost dropped the phone, but Roy was still talking. "_At least that's what I believe, he's in the hospital and according to nurses who take care of him, he's kind and gentle and helpful, he also appears to be human, whatever he's doing here, his acting has certainly improved, I'm not sure what to think about it, I want you to come and see him, and tell me if you think it's him too_," he said and Ed sighed then leaned back again, running a hand through his bangs.

"Um yeah I'll be there on the quickest train I can," he said and then Roy thanked him before they hung up and then Ed looked up to see the furious eyes of his wife.

"Did I just hear you say you're going to Central?" she growled and Ed flinched, she wasn't happy that was for sure.

"Winry...I have to go, it could endanger the kids and you if I don't," he said but that didn't stop Winry from stomping her foot.

"There you go again! You aren't telling me anything! You're just going to walk off? Never come back just like your father?" she yelled and Ed saw tears start to stream down her face, he looked at her wide eyed. Winry had never brought that up, ever. It hit him like a ton of bricks to understand that that must have been one of her biggest fears, he wouldn't deny that that hurt a lot. But he knew he never, in all his life, would ever consider leaving his family. He stood up and in a second had his arms around her in a tight embrace.

"Oh Winry..." he said into her hair, he stroked her back slowly. "I will never leave you, I can't, it would break me to leave you and the kids, I thought you knew that," he whispered and he felt his wife shake a little.

"I d-did! I do! I'm j-just so scared you'll leave for some stupid reason and get hurt!" she sobbed into his chest clutching onto his shirt.

"I won't get hurt I promise, Roy just wants me to go see if I know this guy..." he muttered and sighed, he'd told Winry everything about his and Al's time on the search for the stone but it was still ingrained in him to keep things from her to protect her, he kicked that aside.

"You remember the Homunculi? Well Roy thinks one of them came back and he wants me to confirm it," he said and Winry looked up at him and wiped her eyes, then smiled.

"You told me..." she muttered before she smiled brilliantly at him. "I love you," she said and he laughed.

"I love you too," he said then kissed her briefly before she pushed him back.

"That's right, which is why I'm going with you," she said and Ed blinked. Of course.


	2. Chapter 2

Becky...this goes against all of my writer guidelines...I better get a good freaking review!

Find Me

Cha 2: Name

The young man with no name sighed and leaned back on his bed with a huff, he was bored and none of the nurses needed any help so he was stuck in his room because they didn't like him wandering around. He supposed he could read again but he'd already read all of the books the doctors had given him, they'd even given him some advanced medical texts because he'd nagged Dr. Shepperd's so bad he'd pushed every book he had in his office at him to keep him busy. He'd read all the books in the same manner he ate, quicker than anyone could blink.

The doctor told him it was because teenage boys were endless garbage pits and he was about seventeen himself so of course he fell into that category. And he slept like a log and he was always kind of uncomfortable in his pants, however, he was told he didn't exclusively fall under the male side of the spectrum, he also had girl parts. They called him a boy because he lacked the most obvious female appendages but in his underwear he had the most important one. He also had the boy's opposite so, when it came to the whole attraction thing he was screwed, he saw a hot girl and his maleness went nuts, he saw a hot guy the girl part went gaga too. It sucked a lot but the doctor said they weren't sure if they could remove one without the other. He said he could deal, so that's what he did. Though he wasn't exactly comfortable with having a vagina below his penis.

The young man was roused from his thoughts when a ball of gold came hurling into his room and hid under his bed. He blinked before swinging over the side and looking under his bed upside down what he saw made him smile, a little boy with gold hair and eyes was giggling.

"Hello," he said and the little boy looked at him in surprise before putting a finger to his lips and made a shushing noise.

"I'm hiding!" he giggled and the young man tried not to smile at the cute kid, he got off the bed and kneeled beside it.

"From who?" he asked in a whisper pretending with the little boy who smiled at him.

"Daddy, he was talking with a man in blue and I ran away while Mommy wasn't looking," he whispered back and the older boy tried not to frown. That wasn't good his parents were probably panicking by now.

"That doesn't seem very nice, don't you think your mommy and daddy are worried?" he asked and the little boy frowned, then nodded slowly.

"Yeah...Daddy and Mommy don't like when I'm lost," he said and the young man nodded. Then held out his hand.

"Well then we better go find them, what's your name?" he asked and the little boy took his hand and followed along as they went out the door.

"Nicholas!" the boy said happily and the young man laughed.

"Well it's nice to meet you Nicholas, now let's go find your daddy okay?" he asked and the little boy nodded then started chattering away as the older boy led the way to the nearest hallway where he thought he heard the terrified shriek of a mother.

"I TOOK MY EYES OFF OF HIM FOR ONE SECOND AND THEN HE WAS GONE! WAAAAH! HE COULD HAVE GOTTEN INTO SCALPELS AND HURT HIMSELF HE COULD HAVE WALKED IN ON AN OPERATION AND BEEN TRAUMATIZED!" the young man turned the corner to see a shrieking woman sobbing on a bench and a man, he assumed was her husband and Nicholas' daddy since their hair looked the same, bent in front of her holding a baby in one hand and her own in the other. There were two other people standing next to them in blue, none of them could see the two boys coming since they had their backs to them.

"Winry, it's okay, calm down those are things that could happen in our own house, he's probably fine, a nurse probably found him and is bringing him back right now." the man said reassuringly but the woman shrieked again and whacked him upside the head.

"What do you mean it could happen in our house?" she shrieked at him and the young man stared wide eyed and the little boy, who was looking partly terrified at his mother, clung to his hand.

"Um excuse me," he said to catch their attention and the four people looked at him, three of them stiffened but he didn't seem to notice.

"I think you lost something," he said jokingly before pulling Nicholas in front of him since the boy was trying to hide behind his legs.

The woman lunged at the little boy and gathered him into her arms sobbing into the little boys hair.

"Nicholas! NEVER scare Mommy like that again!" she wailed and Nicholas started crying too, saying he was sorry and just trying to trick daddy and he wouldn't do it again and he was sorry. The young man smiled at the teary reunion before shaking his head and started turning away, but the woman grabbed his hand.

"Thank you," she said and he smiled and squeezed her hand before giving Nicholas a pat on the head.

"It wasn't a problem, I don't have anything to do really, it was the most excitement I've had all day, I'm just glad he found you again," he said and felt a stare boring into his head and looked up to see the father almost glaring at him critically, like he was trying to dissect him. The intensity of the stare made him want to step back but Nicholas had grabbed his hand and he couldn't so he just looked back down at the boy.

"Mommy he's my friend! He helped me find you!" he said happily and the young man smiled down at him before kneeling to look him in the eye.

"That's right, but you have to promise me something, okay?" he asked and the little boy nodded, and the mother looked like she knew what he was going to say, but the other three looked like they were getting ready for an attack.

"You have to promise to never run away from Mommy again okay? You could get hurt and your mommy and daddy and," he looked up at the bundle in the father's arms and from the pink blanket assumed girl, "your little sister would be so sad, you're here to make them happy, do you think you can keep this promise?" he asked and the little boy nodded seriously, the young man held up his pinky, "Pinky promise?" he asked and the little boy held up his own and then tied it and the young man nodded.

"Alright I'll hold you to that Nicholas, be good now," he said then stood up to go but the mother stopped him.

"Excuse me what's your name?" she asked and the young man paused before shrugging and smiling at her

"I don't know, the nurses usually just call me doll or something silly like that," he said and the woman looked at him with sad wide eyes, while Nicholas frowned in confusion.

"Why don't you ask your mommy your name?" he asked and the young man flinched, and both Ed and Roy caught it, they glanced at each other before staring back.

"I don't have a mommy," he said and Nicholas found that very confusing then looked back up at him.

"Then what about your daddy?" he asked and the young man smiled a little sadly at the boy.

"I don't have one of those either, you're lucky Nicholas, you have a mommy and daddy who love you very much," the young man said with a sad smile that could only fool the four year old.

"Yeah...I do, where are yours?" the boy asked still very confused, and his mommy shushed him.

"That's enough Nicholas, sorry, he's just always so curious, just like someone else I know," she said with a cheeky grin then the father looked a little startled before he guarded his face and took a step closer.

"Yeah I guess it runs in the family," he chuckled then held out his free hand the young man shook it a little tentatively, getting the impression that he wasn't liked very much by this man.

"Y-yeah..." he muttered, then the man frowned before he took a breath like he was about to risk it all.

"Right well you already know Nicholas, this is my wife, Winry, I'm Edward and this is Trisha," he said gesturing to the baby who was looking at the stranger with big round blue eyes, before she reached up with her little hands toward him. She cooed when he gave her a finger to grasp.

"She's pretty small for her age, about fourteen months am I right?" he asked and the older male looked surprised.

"How'd you know?" he asked and the young man blushed faintly.

"The head nurse lets me help out in the maternity ward because she thinks I have a calming effect on the babies," he mumbled and the blond frowned before looking at the dark haired man behind them the young man looked up at him and his eyes widened, he hadn't really paid attention to them till now.

"Oh sorry," Edward said and turned to them, "This is Riza Hawkeye and Roy Mustang, friends of ours," he said but the young man was staring at Mustang, his eyes drinking in the mans features and clothes, the man looked back his eyes narrowing, feeling unecomfortable till the boy realized what he was doing he looked away quickly with a blush, just as someone called out to him.

"There you are!" and the young man looked behind himself to see a nurse walking up to them with a mock frown. "I thought you'd gotten lost again," she said and the young male rolled his eyes.

"That only happened once and you gave me wrong directions on purpose," he told her and she giggled before taking the boy's hand.

"Sorry Hun, it was just too funny to imagine our little genius getting lost," she said then turned to the others, "Isn't he a doll? He's such a sweetheart, you know when he first came here he couldn't talk and now we can't get him to stop! He's our little genius!" she giggled at them and the young man put a hand over his reddening face.

"Eloise..." he whined in embarrassment, she giggled again then smiled at the bemused group of people and started pulling him away, but he stopped and turned back to the group with a smile.

"Sorry about her, she's crazy," he grinned at the sound of her playful huff, then looked down and pat Nicholas on the head, "I gotta go, maybe I'll see you later? Who are you visiting?" he asked and looked up at Winry who was gazing at her husband. Edward and Roy exchanged looks again Roy raised his eyebrows and Ed raised them back then the dark haired man nodded.

"Well we're actually here to see you," Edward said and the young man blinked.

"Me? But why?" he asked and then the dark haired man sighed then gestured for them to move, using his hands, which the young man noticed had gloves on them.

"Let's go back to your room first," he said and the young man nodded, completely confused as they made their way back to his room. This was turning into an even more interesting day.

o0o0o0o

They all sat in the young man's room, Winry in a rocking chair a nurse brought in so she could feed Trisha her her bottle and send her to sleep, Roy was sitting in a chair beyond the bed Riza standing behind him while Ed was on the floor with Nicholas and the young man, who Roy and Ed were convinced was a boy who looked just like Envy but wasn't the same. Ed told Roy he was convinced he was different because of Trisha, she never took to new people, and Roy believed that since the baby hadn't taken to him at all, and she'd taken a while to take to Riza but she did. And the little girl had reached out for the young man while they walked back to the room.

But Roy still wasn't entirely convinced, it could still be just an act so he wanted to talk with him more to try and get him to slip up, and reveal something. So far. Nothing.

Roy watched the young man as he played a hand game with Nicholas who was sitting in his father's lap, Roy had to admit, the boy certainly didn't act like Envy at all, from what he knew the homunculus had been very impatient and usually couldn't sit still and hated Humans, including children. But this boy seemed to be fine just playing with the four year old, and Roy could see Ed was beginning to see the human man in the Envy look alike. But Roy was just seeing an intricate trap. He'd brought about the humonculus' death so of course he'd want revenge, and Roy was just waiting, and that's why he'd brought his gloves.

"So...um you don't know your parents?" Ed asked while the young man clapped hands with his son who was thoroughly enjoying himself.

"Nope I don't remember anything. Well..." he mumbled then Ed saw his eyes flicker towards the two in uniform.

"Well? You remember something?" he asked and he saw Roy straighten in his seat as the young man nodded.

"Well um it's not really like a memory it's just a face..." he mumbled and Nicholas pouted at him because he'd lowered his hands, but Ed took the little hands in his own to keep him from interrupting.

"What'd it look like?" Ed asked and he saw the young man blush before looking at Roy again.

"Like him," he mumbled while pointing with his thumb, "The face and the uniform are ingrained in my memory for some reason, only..." he looked over at Roy then turned around and then held up your hand. "Can I see the back of your glove?" he asked tentatively, shyly, like Roy was the only one he couldn't talk to. Roy stared at the young man for a moment before giving him his hand, he certainly wasn't going to take his glove off.

The young man took the offered hand and looked down at the design before tracing it. The circle and the triangles then the small salamander on the bottom.

"I remember this too, but I didn't tell the doctor...I'm not sure why." he mumbled, then realized he'd hung onto Roy's hand longer than necessary and dropped it with a mumbled apology and a blush. And then he was tackled to the floor by a red and blue blur.

"KITTY!" a high voice squealed, and the occupants saw the boy on the ground with a little redheaded girl on top of him, his arm was around her waist as he sat up so she wouldn't fall to the floor while he rubbed the part of his head that had slammed to the ground.

"Uhg, Scarlet...are you trying to make me a permanent resident or do you just enjoy hurting me?" the young man asked in a way the adults knew he was teasing, but surely the little girl wouldn't.

"Both!" the little girl said grinning like a fox, the young man rolled his eyes before beginning to tickle her.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were trying to do me in," he told her as she giggled away in his lap before she threw her arms around his neck and he fell back to the floor.

"Oof," he said and she giggled, then she took notice of the amused guests watching them, she looked down at the young man.

"Kitty, are these your family?" she asked and the young man sighed just as Nicholas came over and sat on the young man's chest he let out a whoosh of air as the small body deflated his lungs.

"Hi! I'm Nichlas!" he greeted excitedly and the little girl held out her hand and Nicholas took it, like they were trying to be grown up.

"I'm Scarlet! Let's be friends!" she said and the little boy nodded, she squealed for happiness and hugged him, he hugged her back with just as much joy while the young man sighed.

"And I do believe I'm a park bench," he said and the adults burst into laughter, it was rather ridiculous to see the young man on the floor with two children sitting on him.

"Well I guess it's a good time for introductions, Scar these people are my friends. There's Edward, and Miss Winry and the baby is Trisha and then Miss Riza and Mr. Mustang," he said and no one failed to notice he tried not to look at the last mentioned. Or that he'd called every one else by their first name except Roy.

"Everyone this is Scarlet she's six, a semi permanent resident here, she's got a lung disease." he informed them then he sat up after grabbing Nicholas under the arm and swinging him up to sit on his shoulders, the boy squealed happily before taking a hold of the older boy's long hair to stay up while the little girl remained in his lap.

"Yep! And Kitty is my friend!" she proclaimed happily, then the young man groaned and put Nicholas hands over his eyes.

"Kitty?" Ed asked with a smirk and the young man went pink, before glaring at the blond sitting across from him.

"Shut up..." he mumbled but then Winry spoke, a smirk in her voice, Envy turned to look at her and saw a twinkle in her blue eyes.

"Oh, you have to tell us, Kitty." she grinned at him holding her sleeping daughter in her lap, and he groaned again, the two kids looked at each other in confusion. They saw no problem with the name.

"When Scar discovered I was nameless she brought it upon herself to find me the perfect name, and she settled on Kitty," he mumbled and the adults laughed again, even Roy let out a chuckle.

"That's right! Cause Kitties are my favorite animal and he's my favorite friend!" Scarlet said and the adults laughed again, that was the logic of a child.

"Like uncle Al!" Nicholas chirped, feeling a little left out from the attention, "Uncle Al likes kitties!" he said and his father groaned then took his son from the older boy's shoulders.

"Don't remind me," he said and the little boy giggled before yawning and his father gave him a look that he went wide eyed at.

"I'm not sleepy daddy I promise!" he said and his father gave him a critical eye before the little boy scurried out of his fathers hold to go behind the young man and Scarlet.

"I wanna stay with Kitty!" he said and the young man groaned louder before falling back to the floor and the others laughed again.

"It's okay Kitty, we don't judge," Winry said before the young man rolled his eyes at her and sighed.

"I find that very hard to believe. I wish I remembered my name at least..." he mumbled putting his arm over his eyes and when no one said anything he removed it and frowned.

"Do you know my name?" he asked to anyone listening and they looked uncomfortable before the dark haired General spoke.

"We might, but we're trying to see if you're the same person," he said and the young man looked up at him.

"Am I?" he asked looking hopeful, and Ed was almost saddened by it, he understood that he'd want to know everything he could about his past, but not if your past was Envy's.

"We're not sure yet, actually we might have a way of knowing, but you'd need to let us see something," Roy said seriously and the young man looked at him in curiosity.

"What's that?" he asked and Roy looked at him for a minutes, watching the black eyes watching him, trying to see if there was any cruelty in the obsidian gaze, but there was none only curiosity.

"If you could take off your shirt and let me see your back," he said and the boy tried his hardest not to blush but failed as he sat up again and took off his shirt then moved his hair out of the way so Roy could see his pale and blemish free back. No marks no red circles on his shoulders, but he still wasn't convinced.

"Alright there's also something supposed to be on your left thigh," he said and the young man looked startled and Roy must have figured he didn't want to take off his pants in front of ladies. Well at least he had manners.

"Just hike your pant leg up past your thigh," he said and the boy looked relieved, more than he should if he was just trying to consider the women and children in the room. The boy pulled his gray hospital pants up and Roy saw no ouroboros. He sighed almost in disappointment. But nodded at the boy so he could pull his pants back down and put his shirt back on Ed gave him a look that said he should give up and that this wasn't Envy, but Roy looked stubborn.

"Kitty?" the little girl asked and the young man looked at her, she was sitting next to Nicholas who was trying his hardest not to fall asleep on his newest friend.

"Yeah Scar?" he asked sounding a bit tired and a little disappointed himself, she fidgeted for a minute.

"Don't you like my name?" she asked and the young man came over to her and hugged her tightly in his arms.

"I love it, but I just want you to call me that cause it's special, I want other's to call me something else, understand?" he asked her and she smiled then nodded and hugged him back before going back to her own room.

"Well it's getting late, I think we should head on," Winry said she'd been watching the steady droop of her son's eye lids and with him currently curled on Envy's lap she knew it was time to go back to the hotel.

"Yeah, come on kiddo," Ed said and went over and picked up his son who clung to the young man's hand.

"No...I wanna stay with Kitty..." he mumbled and Ed sighed before separating him from the hand and held him to his shoulder.

"You'll see him tomorrow, come on it's bed time now," he said and his son nodded tiredly before dozing off on his daddy's shoulder his tiny fingers now clutching to his shirt. Ed and Winry left right before Riza and Roy, Roy was the last out the door but stopped when his cuff was caught in a hand.

"Um...please...can't you tell me...my name?" he asked and the man paused then sighed before turning his head.

"It was Envy," he said simply then he left closing the door softly behind him and the young man dropped to his bed with a frown.

"Envy huh? Well damn...that's hardly any better than Kitty," he groaned before collapsing on his bed and promptly falling to sleep after the day's excitement.


	3. Chapter 3

Yeah so...read review make me want to keep posting and all that jazz...thanks! Read.

Find Me

Cha 3: Equivalent Exchange

As soon as the visitors stepped into the room they had to stifle laughter, the boy was laying on the bed lopsidedly, his right arm and left leg dangling off of the bed, his left arm was resting on his exposed stomach, and his mouth was open a small amount of drool was dribbling out at the corner. Winry had to put a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles and Ed just nodded, that was definitely a comfortable position when you're seventeen. He knew from experience. Roy sighed, the guy was sleeping again, and he was drooling, that was definitely not something a homunculus would do, and definitely not Envy. Winry shook her head before moving to the bed and shaking him gently on the shoulder. He awoke with a start and looked at her in confusion before his sleep addled brain must have recognized her. He groaned and rolled over before putting the pillow over his head.

"Mmmm," he mumbled and she laughed, then pat him on the head, well the pillow, he moved the pillow and she smiled at him.

"Good morning, were you up late?" she asked and he shook his head then pointed at a pile of books in the corner.

"I went to sleep after you left then woke up a few hours later and read till 6:34 this morning..." he mumbled and Winry laughed and pat his head again.

"You're just like Ed, he'd do the same thing!" she giggled and Envy smiled then noticed something missing.

"Where's the kids and Miss Riza?" he asked and Winry sat on the bed next to him then gestured her husband over.

"We're going to meet them, we're taking you around places you knew before to see if it triggers anything," she said and he nodded then had a bundle handed to him by Ed who grinned.

"Get changed, we're not escorting you around Central in your pajamas," he said and Envy looked at the clothes, they were all black and he wondered if maybe he'd only worn black before.

He went in the bathroom and came out moments later wearing black pants and a black t-shirt under a black jacket with black sneakers.

"I feel kinda like a ninja," he said with a grin, "is there a reason it's all black?" he asked and he saw Ed blush, Winry laughed and Roy rolled his eyes.

"Well Since I haven't let Ed buy his own clothes in years he felt the need to push his fashion sense on to you," she grinned and Ed blushed harder.

"Black makes everyone look better!" he huffed then pointed at Roy, "Even the bastard would look better in black!" he said and Roy shook his head in amusement and Winry laughed again.

"I think he looks fine in whatever he has on," another voice said and they looked over at the boy who immediately blushed and looked away.

"Well," Ed grinned mischievously and looked like he was about to say something else but his wife kicked his leg and he keeled over and couldn't seem to get back up.

"Aaah! Winry! I thought you said you fixed the kink!" Ed wailed and pulled his pant leg up to reveal his automail, his fingers moved under the knee joint to mess with something then he was standing up and bawling at his wife.

"Winr~y! You said you fixed it!" he told her and the woman grinned at him then shrugged.

"Then what would the fun of kicking you over be hmm?" she asked and he groaned and was about to say something when again the young man said something else.

"You have automail Ed?"he asked and Ed blinked then nodded and pulled his pant leg back up to show the boy.

"Yeah I've had it since I was eleven," he said and Roy watched as the boy's eyes widened in surprise.

"That long? You can't be too much older than twenty right? How on earth did you lose it?" he asked and Ed pursed his lips then sighed.

"Alchemy accident," he replied and the boys black eyes sparkled.

"You know alchemy?" he asked and Ed nodded looking a little pleased by the look of awe on the young man's face.

"Yeah, I can't do it anymore, but I do know it." he said and before the other male asked another question he was interrupted by Roy.

"As much fun as this is, I would rather not have my head shot off, so if you please," he said and Ed and Winry laughed, the boy just looked confused but they all headed out.

"Where are we going?" the young man asked after Roy had checked him out since he was the only one allowed to.

"Central Headquarters, that's one of the main places you hung out," Ed said and the young man cocked his head to the side.

"Was I in the military? Aren't I little young?" he asked skeptically, and Roy and Ed looked at each other.

"Well, okay, here's the deal, we need to check and see a few things before we tell you everything okay? But once we check we'll tell you everything we know okay?" Ed asked and the young man nodded.

"Okay, but um...can I change my name? Cause Envy sounds really dumb," he mumbled and Ed paused before he started laughing.

"You're not the same at all! Haha! See Roy, yer just superstitious!" Ed said then slapped the man on the back and he grunted.

"I'm glad your arm is real again, that would have hurt with the automail." he grumbled then turned back to the young man with a forced smile.

"Well since that is your name, you might just have to deal," he said and the boy nodded and sighed resignedly and smiled.

"At least now I have a name, though I don't know how it compares to Kitty," he joked and Winry laughed while Ed smirked.

"I dunno Kitty is a pretty awesome name!" Ed laughed and the now renamed Envy groaned and slapped a hand to his face.

"Ahahaha...kill me now," he muttered and Ed started howling with laughter until his wife slapped him upside the head.

They continued the walk to headquarters, Ed and Envy talking mostly until Winry caught him up in a conversation about mechanics something he was apparently very interested in. Ed stalled a bit so he could walk next to the older man.

"So?" he asked and the older man sighed and watched the boy who was laughing with the blond woman.

"I just can't accept him, he still killed Hughes," he muttered and Ed sighed, then looked at his former commanding officer.

"I think you're afraid to," Ed said and the man looked at him in surprise, "You know Winry forgave Scar for killing her parents, and now they get along when he visits from New Ishbal, I think you're just scared you'll like this new Envy and think you'll be betraying Hughes if you let yourself like him," Ed said and Roy spluttered and turned red.

"That's not it at all!" he hissed and Ed just rolled his eyes then stopped walking to look at the man full on.

"You are the last thing he remembers, I think that means something. I'd bet my right arm that he remembers you because you killed him so many times, that can certainly leave a mark on someones psyche, and I think maybe...he's back...to make it up to you." Ed said and Roy frowned.

"How do you figure?" he asked then Ed smiled,that smile that he'd had when he'd seen his brother in his body for the first time after so many years.

"Equivalent exchange," he said and started walking cause the other two had called to them, and Roy frowned.

"But that doesn't make any sense I already..." he started but Ed waved a hand at him then smirked.

"Just go along with it Mustang and don't let him out of your sight, then maybe you'll get something too," Ed said and he left Roy standing there totally bewildered till he realized he'd been left behind and caught up so they could enter headquarters with him.

They entered Roy's office after walking through the building, Riza was standing there with her pistol in her hand, her arms crossed.

"Sir," she started but he grumbled and moved towards his office without further prompting.

"I'm going, I'm going," he said and the others in the office laughed until Riza's gaze fell on them. Ed and Winry were the only ones laughing while Envy looked on wide eyed. Until Ed turned to him.

"So anything returning?" he asked and Envy shook his head a little sadly.

"No, sorry..." he said and Ed pat him on the back.

"No need to be sorry. Look at it this way, now you can just start over and have a better life," he said then Envy nodded a little unsure. Was his life so bad it needed to be better?

"You know what else he needs to be better?" Jean asked and the three guests turned to him in interest.

"His hair style, it looks like it could take someone out," the trying-to-quit-smoking Captain said chewing on the end of his pencil.

"And what would you know about style?" Winry asked crossing her arms and Jean sighed then tugged on a lock of Envy's hair, who flinched and then stepped out of reach of the blond.

"It's a danger to him, you know, it could get caught, or he could get raped, looking like a cute girl and all," he said grinning and Ed and Winry sighed while Envy went pink.

"You are impossible," Winry rolled her eyes but pulled Envy to sit down in a chair she brushed through his hair with her fingers before tying his hair back at his neck with a tie she pulled from nowhere, then she looked at him and frowned then pulled it out and then set it up higher leaving the hair in his face down for 'real style', she told Havoc who rolled his eyes.

Ed hummed at Envy and narrowed his eyes, Envy leaned back a little in the chair looking back with apprehension.

"No, that doesn't work," he said then went behind Envy before he could say anything and had already taken the hair tie out and was braiding it.

"There!" he said and then held it up to show the people in the office, Havoc and Breda groaned while Falman and Hawkeye shook their heads. Roy snorted.

"Now he just needs a red jacket and he'll be a taller, darker version of you," Roy smirked from his office doorway.

"Ha ha ha. That is so old Mustang, kind of like you," Ed replied and Roy frowned then narrowed his eyes.

"I can never win one anymore," he muttered sadly and went back into his office with a depressed shuffle.

"What did he mean by a 'version of you'?" Envy asked and Ed grinned almost smugly, he let out a breath of cocky air and put a hand on his hip.

"Well, I was once the youngest State Alchemist in History and I refused to wear the uniform so I wore black and a bright red coat," Ed said and Envy's eyes widened in awe.

"Wow, that's amazing, how did you do that?" he asked but before Ed could start boasting like the smug dork he was, Fury was dragged into the room by an excited four year old, while he carried an attentive baby in the other arm.

"Nicholas you need to slow down," Fury said in a chastising tone, the little boy apologized before he saw Envy.

"KITTY!" he squealed then launched himself at the older boy who caught him before he landed face first on the ground.

"Hey Nicholas," he said and got hugged by the now chattering little boy while Winry relieved Fury of the baby.

"You came to visit like Daddy said!" he trilled happily while Envy nodded a little amused.

"Of course I did," he said and then Nicholas hugged him again, and Envy laughed gently, so maybe he didn't know much about himself yet, but he was pretty happy as he was.

It was much later in the evening, and Nicholas was asleep with his head on Envy's leg while Trisha was asleep in his lap, a tiny hand was wrapped around his finger, the adults laughed and joked in the office way past hours. They'd turned the desks into makeshift tables and ordered in, most of the adults were amazed by how much Envy could eat, except Ed who said he was a teenager and they could pack it away, in case they'd forgotten and that brought up Ed's own eating habits.

It was a day full of teasing and laughter and none of the soldiers really got any of their work done. But it was fun and Envy was having the time of his life, though he didn't understand most of the jokes, he still enjoyed being around laughter, that was hard to come by in a hospital. Now the adults were playing a card game, Ed was winning though Envy was pretty sure he was cheating, everyone was still having fun though so it was alright. He closed his eyes with a smile.

"Hey Envy you okay?" a hand was on his shoulder and he blinked, the desks were back to their right places and everyone was getting ready to go.

"Oh...yeah," he told Ed who smiled then picked up the little girl who still clung to Envy's finger, and handed her to her mother before picking up Nicholas who snuggled up against his father's shoulder.

"You fall asleep?" he asked and Envy shrugged before standing up and taking note that he was about as tall as the older man, maybe an inch or so shorter.

"I guess, I'm not used to being that content I guess." he said while popping his back and Ed smiled at him.

"Well it's a compliment to know you're that comfortable around us," he said and Envy looked at him confused.

"Shouldn't I be?" he asked and Ed's grin looked a little forced now but he nodded anyway.

"Yeah, we're friends now," he said and Envy smiled.

"Thanks," he replied and Ed smiled back as Envy turned to thank Winry, Ed looked over at Roy with a meaningful glare, but the man pretended not to notice.


	4. Chapter 4

Because I got a review, it's amazing what those do you know? More reviews means updates sooner. Holy shit! What a concept. -_- It's short...becasue i was short on reviews. Haaa. *pointed look*

Find Me

Cha 4: Sharing

Envy was laying in bed back at the hospital his hands behind his head as he thought about his past two days. When he'd first met the group, Winry had been the first to accept him, and then Ed had, and it looked like Riza liked him too, but Roy...he didn't seem to like Envy at all, and he wanted to change that. He wanted Roy to like him. Because he found himself liking Roy the most despite the mans obvious hatred towards him, maybe because he felt a connection, and he wanted it to be strong. He wanted to be strong, he wanted Roy to like him, even though he was a freak.

"Envy are you awake?" Winry tapped on Envy's open door, he looked up from the book he'd been reading, Ed had given him a bunch last week and he had read them all in record time, and Ed was so giddy by it, he got him twice as much the next time.

"Yep, Hi Miss Winry, how are you?" he asked and Winry shook her head with a laugh.

"How many times do I have to tell you to just call me Winry?" she asked and Envy chuckled a bit.

"Sorry Winry, how're you today?" he asked and Winry smiled at him then waltz into the room with a secretive grin.

"I'm great, now how would you feel about coming on a date with me?" she asked and Envy's eyebrows shot up before he realized she was teasing, he shook his head with a sigh.

"And what exactly would this 'date' entail hmm?" he asked and she giggled glad he was playing along.

"Oh not much, just lunch and some shopping," she said and Envy blinked that sounded more like a date with a friend, but what did he know? The only real information he got on romance was from the books the nurses let him read and those weren't meant to be research material.

"Okay, I'll tag along," he said and Winry smiled brightly.

"Splendid," she said and then he barely had time to put on the only outfit he had before he was dragged out of the room and the building to go gallivanting downtown Central. Envy was dragged into every clothing store Winry saw and she made him try on so many clothes he got dizzy, she even bought him several new out fits despite his protests. The only time he stopped was at the window of a toy shop where he saw a stuffed white kitty, with a bow on it's ear, he smiled, it was pretty cute, Winry was next to him in seconds realizing she'd gone on without him.

"Do you like it? It's cute, "she said and Envy nodded before he realized, boy's didn't like cute things.

"N-no, I was...I was just thinking...thinking that Scarlet would like it!" he lied quickly his cheeks still heating up despite that. Winry was looking at him from the corner of her eye wondering that perhaps...was he..?

"You're right, she would, why don't we get it for her?" she asked and Envy shook his head adamantly.

"No it's okay you've spent enough money on me already! And besides, if I got her a kitty, I'll never live it down. No really, please don't..." he said his eyes wide as he begged and Winry narrowed her eyes, she was pretty sure, but she would ask later.

"Well if you're sure," she said and he nodded and they continued on, Envy was a little more resigned after it all and he was barely eating at the café they'd stopped at for lunch.

"Envy can I ask you something?" she asked and she saw the boy tense but he nodded his head. She figured he knew what she was going to ask and was getting ready to be ridiculed for it, maybe he was used to that, but Winry was not so narrow-minded.

"Do you like other boys?" she asked straight out and then was surprised to see the confused look on the boys face.

"What? Do you mean am I gay?" he asked and he sounded a bit amused, she nodded and he laughed.

"No, I'm not gay," he replied and she frowned and was about to ask when he sighed and glanced up at her.

"I'll tell you what's wrong with me...but please don't tell anyone," he whispered and she nodded, he glanced around to make sure no one was listening then gulped.

"Um...well you see...I'm...uh...not exactly...a boy," he said and she blinked.

"So you're a girl?" she asked and he shook his head, she blinked again, okay now she was confused.

"I'm kind of...both," he said and she cocked her head to the side, before she realized what he meant and her eyes widened.

"Whoa..." she said and he turned pink, probably in shame, she didn't want that, "Not to spoil any appetites but...which one do you use to go to the bathroom?" she whispered and Envy looked back up at her for a moment before starting to laugh. She started to laugh too and other patrons of the café were staring, once they were done and gasping for breath Envy spoke.

"So you're not...disgusted?" he asked and she shook her head no.

"Not at all, I work with automail so I've seen a lot of gross things, and really having both is kind of cool, you can be on both sides of the spectrum you know?" she asked and Envy smiled at her.

"Yeah," and he finally started to eat his food with the vigor he normally had. Glad that he wasn't going to be hated by his first real friend for being different.

Once they were finished eating they met up with Ed and the kids who'd been at the zoo all day, Nicholas told his Mommy and Envy about the lions and how big they were. Then Winry said she wanted to go get a skirt she hadn't decided on and they could just meet her back at the hospital so that's where Ed, Envy and the kids went.

"So Envy how are you liking the books?" Ed asked with a smirk and Envy laughed as he let Nicholas jump over a curb.

"I'm almost done with them," he replied and Ed's eyes jumped out of their sockets.

"No way! It took me four months to read all of those books!" he said in amazement and Envy chuckled a little nervously.

"Well weren't you always on the road and stuff? I'm in a room all day with nothing better to do," he said and Ed flushed feeling a little silly, then feeling a bit guilty, he kept forgetting that Envy really didn't have a life outside of his own family and the guys in the office, though Roy wasn't being very friendly.

"Yeah I was, and I was usually with my brother," Ed murmured as they waved to the receptionist and went to Envy's room.

"You have a brother?" Envy asked and Ed nodded, forgetting again that Envy was still learning things about him, which he would have known before.

"Yeah his name is Alphonse and he's a year younger than me and taller by three inches," Ed growled and Envy laughed as they entered his room and Nicholas pounced on the bed and Envy put the stuff Winry had gotten him in a chair.

"I get a feeling you have an inferiority complex," Envy grinned and Ed snorted and rolled his eyes while he checked Trisha's diaper.

"Roy would have said the same thing." he muttered cynically, and Envy made a sound in the back of his throat, Ed looked at him curiously.

"He...doesn't like me very much does he?" he asked quietly and Ed turned to him while picking Trisha back up who had started to suck her thumb out of hunger and gazed at him like she was worried, Envy held his arms out for her while Ed went to get a bottle.

"I wouldn't really say that, I know he likes you, it's hard not to, but he has a grudge against the old you that he refuses to let go," Ed said while he shook up the formula then handed it to Envy who then gave it to Trisha.

"What did I do to him?" Envy asked apprehensively, and Ed knew he was worried it was terrible, Ed wanted to deter those worries but he couldn't.

"We decided we're going to tell you everything tomorrow okay?" Ed said and Envy nodded just as Winry walked into the room.

"Sorry it took so long, I had to fight three other women to get it in my size," she said joyfully and Ed laughed.

"But I thought no one else wore extra extra small?" he grinned and Winry rolled her eyes but she was smiling, she dropped the bag by the door, then came over to kiss her husband.

"You're lucky I love you and not your cheesy pick up lines," she said and Ed grinned.

"Hey one of them worked," he smirked and Winry laughed before she kissed him lightly on the lips.

"Ew..." Nicholas said from the bed and his parents broke apart laughing, Envy shook his head and looked down at the baby who was nursing her bottle slowly like she wanted to enjoy it. She seemed so peaceful and holding her made him feel relaxed and at peace himself.

The Elrics stayed a bit longer before bidding Envy goodbye and promising they'd be back tomorrow. Envy waved at them then closed the door, he sighed a bit sadly before he looked down and saw Winry had forgotten her skirt he picked up the bag and was about to open the door when he looked inside and saw there was no skirt at all.

He reached a hand in and pulled out the white stuffed cat, he stared at it a while before he started laughing, he dropped the bag on the floor then brought the cat to his face and giggled into it. He hugged it to his chest before going over to his bed and flopped down on it.

"Kitty, indeed," he said to it, and laughed again, falling asleep with a smile on his face and the cat in his arms.


	5. Chapter 5

Because I'm nicer than I led you to believe.

Find Me

Chapter 5: Father

Envy was sitting on one of the couches in Roy's office while the man talked with some of the people from Parliament on the phone, who were working with military to strip the position of Fuhrer of power and divide it among a committee and have a military representative while the rest was made of Parliament members, Roy was vying for that military position. But unfortunately he wasn't the only one.

Roy glanced up at the boy sitting on the couch, his hands worried his t-shirt bottom as his eyes flickered around the room trying not to stop on Roy at all. The man withheld a sigh, he really didn't need this, why couldn't Ed just tell him by himself? He was busy. But he knew that there were some things he was going to have to tell him, and he did want to see the boy's reaction.

"Yes Prime Minister, I do think we need to increase the number of State Alchemists, however I don't think we should accept any one who applies," Roy said for what Envy was sure the tenth time, then the door opened and Ed walked in looking pensive, Roy waved for him to sit down while he told the Prime Minister they would discuss things later. He hung up the phone to see Ed laying on the other couch with an arm over his eyes while Envy was looking at him amused.

"You okay there Ed?" Roy asked and Ed nodded and grunted in response.

"Nicholas threw a tantrum last night when we told him we're leaving," Ed mumbled and Envy's eyes widened.

"You're leaving? Where are you going?" Envy asked and Ed removed his arm and looked at the teenager and smiled sadly.

"We're going back home, we've been here for two weeks, Winry is starting to get antsy," he said and Envy nodded but Ed saw the sadness and disappointment in his eyes.

"We would love it if you came to visit sometime," he said and Envy smiled in thanks then Roy sighed and came over to the couch Ed sat up and he sat down.

"Alright, so where do we start?" Roy asked and Envy and Ed shrugged, Roy sighed then looked at Envy who looked at him for a moment before looking away.

"Why not just ask questions and then we'll get right into it," Roy said and Envy nodded then he looked up at Ed.

"Do you know my parents?" he asked and Ed sighed then leaned back before answering.

"Well I guess that's a good place to start," Ed mumbled then he leaned over and set his elbows on his knees.

"When we first knew you, you weren't actually human," Ed said and Envy's eyebrows shot up, his eyes widening.

"You were a Homunculus," Ed said and Envy looked confused, he had no idea what that was. "A homunculus was a fragment of a being that escaped the Gate several centuries ago, he manipulated people into making a giant philosopher's stone that gave him his power, in essence that being was your father. He gave you and six others life by splitting fractions of the power he had, and from what I saw you made a dysfunctional family." Ed said and Envy just blinked.

"So...I had...siblings?" he asked and Ed could see that was something that made him happy, Ed smiled and nodded.

"Yeah. There was Greed, Gluttony, Lust, Wrath, Sloth and Pride." Ed said and Envy frowned then snorted.

"The seven cardinal Sins huh? That's dumb," he said and Ed laughed and nodded.

"A bit yeah, aside from being immortal until your Philosopher's Stone were spent, each of you had a different ability, you could change yourself to look like whatever or whoever you wanted, and you used that power to help Father, I remember when you usually looked like a blond soldier, so you could help Wrath who was the Fuhrer," Ed said and Envy's eyes widened.

"So was Daddy dearest planning to take over the world?" Envy asked unamused and Ed made a face.

"Close enough, he was planning to use the souls of the country to turn himself into a god, by spilling blood all over the country and creating a giant underground transmutation circle that he was going to use, all of the people of the country would open the gate and call forth a god." Ed said and looked up to see Envy's eyes were about the size of dinner plates.

"I know that's a lot to take in but it is true, though it's a bit watered down in the history books," Ed grinned but Envy wasn't laughing, he wasn't finding any of this remotely funny.

"What did I do...for him, what did he make me do?" he asked quietly and Ed bit his lip, he really didn't want to tell the kid, who was patient and quiet and kind that he'd been a murderous monster but Roy replied.

"Anything," he said bluntly and the boy looked at him almost hurt, "You would do anything for him, even things you didn't need to do, like murder and rape people, you got your kicks by hearing innocent humans scream, by torturing them until they wished for death and you'd take sick pleasure in giving them that, you were a monster and a murderer," Roy said and he got a sick satisfaction to see the boy go paler.

"H-how do you know?" he chocked out barely above a whisper and Roy glared at him.

"You killed my best friend while wearing the face of his wife," Envy's face went from white to green in seconds and even faster than that he was running out of the office with a hand over his mouth.

"Satisfied?" Ed asked coldly as he stood up to go after Envy, "You didn't have to do that, he's not the same anymore Roy, I bet you he's going to think about it everyday for the rest of his life, and beside the fact that he's still just a kid, the guilt is going to eat him alive, I sure hope you're proud of yourself." Ed said before he left the room a disgusted huff the only thing he left behind.

Roy let out a breath of air, he'd done what he had wanted he'd wanted to see that face in pain again, and he had, only this time it wasn't nearly as satisfying as the last time, and this time he felt really...guilty.

o0o0o0o

Envy heaved over the side of the toilet again, and sobbed as his hands fisted painfully.

Had he really done that? Had he killed people? Taken sick pleasure in hearing their pleas for mercy? Had he liked seeing them bleed? When he'd killed that man in his wife's face had he laughed? Had he been excited to carry out orders that involved killing people? Spilling the blood of innocents? Had he killed children? Mothers? Babies?

He cried out in despair before heaving over the toilet again, this time hands pat his back and pulled his hair away, a quiet voice made soft shushing noises of comfort. Envy sobbed again and he was pulled against a chest while toilet paper was used to wipe his face clean. His hair was stroked while he sobbed, he looked up to see Ed looking a bit guiltily down at him. But he didn't care why.

"W-was I-I really t-that terrible? Did I r-really do a-all those h-horrible things?" he asked the tone in his voice begging for denial. But Ed sighed and then wrapped an arm around the boy who really wasn't that much younger than him but had had much less experience in his six months of life than Ed did in his 23 years.

"Honestly I'm really not sure, all I know is what it felt like whenever I was around you, like the only reason I was alive and not being tortured by you was because your father wanted me alive. You certainly weren't considerate like you are now, you called me short so nonchalantly I think that's what pissed me off more than being called a bean," Ed said and Envy gave a sad watery laugh, "I didn't know you then, but I do know you now, and I know you are none of those things, you are not a monster or a murderer, if you were any of those things do you really think I would trust you with my children?" he asked and Envy shook his head then inhaled a little.

"You're a really good dad," he mumbled and Ed went pink with pleasure.

"Aw shucks, you're making me blush," he grinned and Envy smiled a little in return then he retreated from Ed's arms and then hugged his knees.

"Did I kill that man...? Is that why...why he doesn't like me?" Envy whispered and Ed sighed leaning back a little himself.

"Yeah, that one I know for sure, we met up with you later and you bragged about it, going so far as to turn in to his wife again, Roy was infuriated, he was quite literally blinded by rage, I've never seen him so angry, and then he killed you so many times, burning you until you had nothing left, until you couldn't take it anymore and ended your life yourself." Ed said and Envy had furrowed eyebrows.

"And he still hates me?" Envy asked and Ed sighed deeper, crossing his arms.

"Now I'm not entirely sure he hates you, I believe you were brought back in order to teach Roy forgiveness, he doesn't forgive others very easily, but he most certainly never forgives himself, a quality he needs to learn. And now here you are, a kid with a personality almost identical to my brothers, not really you're a bit different, but my brother is the hardest person not to love, and you are too, Roy just needs to get over himself first." Ed said and he saw the small blush on Envy's face from being called easily lovable. Ed stood up then held out his hand to Envy who took it after flushing the toilet.

"He won't say he's sorry for what he said because he's too damn proud but he won't say it again," Ed said and Envy nodded then was led back to the office when he entered he couldn't look anyone in the eye, even Riza or Jean who he'd gotten along with very easily, Breda tended to tease him a lot, and Fury and him were just too shy to really try to get along, Falman was like a walking library so the two of them got along very well. But still he couldn't look at any of them.

Ed walked in and cleared his throat and the others looked up in curiosity Ed was standing there with that same look he had on when he was determined to get what he wanted.

"Kay I'm leaving tomorrow and I have one thing I want to happen before I go back, and I want it done. Got it?" Ed crossed his arms and Riza's lip quirked.

"We will most certainly try Ed, what would you like done?" she asked a little more than amused and Ed nodded, happy with the response.

"I want him," Ed pointed at Envy, "in a house by the end of the day, and to my understanding the only one available to do that would be: the Major-General," Ed said and he smiled at the two exclamations.

"W-what? I couldn't do that! It's far too imposing! I'm fine where I am!" Envy cried at the same time Roy charged out of his office.

"Since when was this decided Fullmetal? I don't have enough room! How do you expect me to care for anyone when I'm so busy?" Roy demanded and Ed sighed then held up his hands, he pointed at Envy.

"You can't stay in the hospital forever that's no place to grow up, and anywhere that isn't the hospital would be imposing to you," he told the boy who blushed, then the blond pointed to the man, "and don't give me any shit, you have a two bedroom town house, and he's not a child he's perfectly capable of caring for himself. And I just decided it, in fact, it's already done, I told the hospital you'd be discharging him and taking him home this evening." Ed grinned and the two brunettes looked scandalized. Then he clapped his hands grabbed Envy's and headed for the door.

"We're gonna go now! Remember to pick up your new house mate Roy!" Ed said cheerfully then he glanced at Hawkeye, giving her a meaningful look before he smiled at everyone else and dragged Envy from the room in the blink of an eye.

"Well that was fun," Breda grinned then had pen caps throw at his head.


	6. Chapter 6

You may be wondering why I update at odd hours of the morning/day/night it's cause I like to keep you on your toes. :D

Find Me

Chapter 6: Goodbye, Hello

Envy was silent as Ed dragged him back to the hospital where Winry and the kids were, he couldn't believe Ed had just done that, he couldn't believe that he was going to live with Roy now. He was jumped on by Nicholas which was the little boy's normal greeting whenever the teenager was around, and he had to catch him fast or he would have fallen. Trisha reached out to him when her blue eyes caught sight of him, and it hit Envy how much he'd miss the family when they left.

"Do you really have to leave?" he asked quietly and he hugged Nicholas a little tighter and the little boy squirmed, but didn't complain.

"I'm afraid so, poor Al is probably overwhelmed with my costumers by now," Winry said as she resignedly handed Envy her daughter because she started to fuss, Envy moved Nicholas over to take the baby who laid her head on the boys chest and immediately closed her eyes in contentment she smiled and took his shirt in her small hand.

"But you can come and visit whenever you want, if you can handle a three day train ride that is," Winry smiled and Envy nodded still somewhat depressed.

"And we expect you to see us off at the station tomorrow," Ed said as he gathered the books Envy had read twice over so he could return them to the library.

"If I'm still alive by then..." Envy mumbled and Winry and Ed looked over at him, Winry with a raised eyebrow whereas Ed looked at him unamused.

"Envy, he's not going to kill you, you're too nice to get murdered by a bastard," Ed said and Envy rolled his eyes.

"Don't you read Ed? It's always the nice characters that get slaughtered," Envy said sarcastically and Ed huffed. (intentional irony? Hell yes.)

"Yeah well too bad, you're not gonna die cause you're supposed to be here to bug the crap out of Roy and you can't do that dead, so you have to just deal, I know he's probably going to be cold to you and he might ignore you, but he'll warm up to you, I know he will that's why you're here." Ed said and Envy turned red, he felt a little silly but he felt he had right to.

He didn't want to sleep in the same house as that man, not because he was worried about the man killing him, it was because he was afraid of him finding out about his abnormality. And also...his dreams, his wet dreams, now Envy was familiar with them he'd had a few while in the hospital but it was usually the boy part that did it, but after he'd met Roy, it was both. At the same time occasionally, and Envy was afraid that his genitalia would go haywire being in the same house as the subject of his dreams.

"Yeah..." Envy muttered willing away his ability to blush, but Ed smiled then declared they were going to help him pack, but since Envy had two children, one of whom was sleeping, in his arms it was mainly Winry and Ed who packed, but luckily Envy didn't have much, just his clothes and the stuffed cat, which Ed raised an eyebrow at and Envy felt the need to tell him about his problem but he really didn't want to with two small sets of ears nearby. But by the time Ed had returned all the books to their rightful places, both children were deeply asleep and Winry was almost asleep herself in one of the chairs.

"Um...Ed?" Envy asked when he walked into the room, Ed hummed to show he was listening and Envy gulped.

"I um...have something I want to tell you," he said quietly and Ed stood in front of him, looking serious.

"Is something wrong? Are you okay?" he asked and Envy fidgeted a little glancing up at Ed then back down, worrying his shirt in his free hand since Nicholas was asleep on the bed and Trisha refused to let go of him.

"Um I kinda have a...deformity..." he said and Ed frowned then he grabbed a chair and sat across from the teen.

"Is it serious?" he asked, and Envy shook his head a little embarrassed for getting the older male worked up over something so stupid.

"No, no it's...it's like...I'm defective," He said and Ed looked at him confused so Envy decided to hell with it, they were leaving anyway, "I'm both...I'm a boy and a girl," he said and Ed stared at him for a moment before looking confused.

"So wait...you've got...?" one of his hands, his forefinger and his thumb made a circle while the other hand just pointed and Envy went red. Then there was a scandalized but almost silent shriek from Ed's wife.

"Edward!" she scolded him and was over to him smacking him upside the head quicker than Envy could blink.

"That's terrible!" she hissed at him and Ed shrugged while Envy put a hand to his face mostly out of embarrassment than anything else.

"What? It's not that bad," Ed said and Winry glared at him.

"You're so crude," she told him and he shrugged in an innocent fashion smiling brightly.

"But you love me," he told her and she rolled her eyes but leaned down to kiss him anyway.

"Unfortunately," she muttered, Envy waited till they were done before speaking again.

"So...you're not...sickened by me?" Envy asked Ed who shrugged and waved a hand before leaning back in his chair relaxed.

"Nah, I used to be half metal you're half girl, big deal," Ed shrugged and Envy was almost envious of Ed's indifference to his problem. Winry sighed and shook her head before going over to the bed and picking up Nicholas.

"It's about time we headed back to the hotel," she said and Envy nodded and handed the baby to her father, she tried to cling to him in her sleep but failed. They were halfway out the door when Ed turned to him.

"Envy, it's hard to do sometimes, but don't bother to care what other people think of you and just be yourself, you're a hard person to not make a good impact on others," Ed winked and then he left closing the door softly behind him.

Envy sat on his bed waiting with his bag, he made sure the cat was at the bottom of the bag so no one saw it, especially Roy. He really hoped the man learned to at least...hate him less. He knew Ed said that Roy didn't hate him, but it was hard to believe when the gaze staring at him was cold and harsh and words spoken were crisp and brief. Envy wished, with all his heart that Roy could accept him, if only to forgive himself like Ed said he was there for, but he wished for the most just to see the man smile at him.

Envy jumped when he heard the door open, he looked up to see Roy standing there holding the door open, he didn't even come in the room, and Envy figured he was feeling bitter about this whole thing, Envy grabbed his bag and hurried to the door his eyes flickered to the man to see him not even looking at him, his face a mask, not giving anything away. Once Envy was out of the door it was snapped closed and the man was walking briskly down the hallway, Envy had to almost run to keep up. Then they were outside to a car in moments, Roy opened the back door and waited for Envy to get in who practically dove in so as not to incite the man's ire for being slow. Then Roy closed the door and got into the passenger side and told the person in the driver's seat to go.

"Hello Envy," the driver said and Envy looked up to see Riza smiling gently at him. He smiled tentatively back at her.

"Hi Miss Riza," he mumbled and she chuckled softly, she noticed he was worrying his shirt in his hands, a habit for when he was afraid maybe. She glanced at her passenger to see the man looking stone faced out the windshield. She sighed, she sure hoped the boy would be okay with her C.O. But sometimes she wasn't so sure.

The rest of the drive was silent, and then they were in a part of the city near the park, when Riza pulled into a drive way. Roy got out and Envy was quick to follow, Roy opened his front door and let Envy in go first, while Riza caught the man to talk to him, Envy walked in curiously. There was a den to the right and up a head was the kitchen then a little further there was the living room, and then the dining room, and up the stairs there was probably the bedrooms and a bathroom, there was a another bathroom between the den and the kitchen. From the look of the things all over the place, it was a typical bachelor pad. It was dirty. And Envy had to ignore it as he walked into the den, he really didn't like dirty things.

Envy walked in a little further to see there was a fireplace in the den, and on it there were some picture frames. Envy looked at them, there was one of Roy in a Military academy uniform with the rest of his class, and then another with him and his subordinates, Ed was among them in his red coat, and then another, Roy in a suit with another man who was laughing, he had glasses and green eyes. Envy had a strong feeling this was the man he'd killed. His finger came up to brush the mans face but a hand shot out of no where and grabbed the frame.

"Your room is upstairs, on the right," Roy said coldly and Envy looked at him slightly terrified, before looking away and backing away.

"S-sorry," he choked and then left the den and rushed up the stairs he went into the room to see it littered with books, that was an up he supposed, he did like to read after all. But then again he didn't know if he had permission.

He looked around the room a little unsure, there was a dresser and a bed, it looked pretty dusty the curtains on the window were dusty too, everything was dusty. Envy almost groaned, he had a lot of cleaning to do. He walked over to the bed and sat down slowly so as not to make a dust cloud, then he brought his bag up to his chest and hugged it tightly. Squeezing the cat at the bottom.

He was with the man he wanted to impress the most, he was living with the man he wanted to see smile, he was with _Roy_. But why was it that right then, Envy really wished he wasn't?

Envy didn't know how long he had been sitting on the bed when the door opened, and the man took a step in, he didn't even look at Envy he was looking at the dresser as he spoke.

"If you're hungry there's food on the kitchen table," the man said and then left not waiting for an answer.

"Thank you," Envy whispered, and then bit his lip, the door was still open, he was hungry, he really was, his stomach had started growling the moment the man had mentioned food he just really didn't want to go downstairs and see his cold glare again so he stood up and closed the door then returned to the bed pulled off the comforter and sheets and pillow cases and tossed them on the floor, they were dirty already it didn't really matter, then he took the cat out of the bag and curled up on the bed clutching the cat and finally let the tears fall.


	7. Chapter 7

Long chapter this time...Becky...you are a dork. Just thought you should know.

Find Me

Cha 7: Cleaning cleanses the Soul

Envy woke up the next morning feeling very groggy, and he looked at the clock on the nightstand to see why, it was 6:30 am, he could hear Roy moving downstairs, getting ready for work, but Envy had no desire to see him off. So he stayed in the room and listened until the man left, feeling relieved that he hadn't come up.

He got off the bed and then opened the door and window to let in some air because the room was very stale. Then he grabbed the bed covers and curtains and went downstairs in search of the washing machine, he knew how to clean because he'd helped the nurses when he'd been in the hospital. He found a washer and dryer in a little enclave in the kitchen he put the curtains in first leaving the covers in a pile on the floor for later. Then he searched the closets for a bucket and sponge he found some soap by the sink, he made a bucket of soapy water he brought upstairs. Then set by the door, before he could clean everything he had to move the books. He rolled up his sleeves then set to work.

It took him several hours to clear the room of the hundreds of books, some of which really caught his attention and made him want to read them right then but he didn't. Instead he put them with the other books in the hall. He went back down stairs and put the curtains in the dryer and then put next load in. Then went back up stairs and grabbed a rag he used to dust off most of the surfaces. Then he grabbed the bucket and sponge and started scrubbing the floor vigorously. After finishing the floor he went back down stairs grabbed the curtains put the next load in the dryer then went upstairs to put the curtains back up. Then he put the books back only in a better organized pile against the walls, he went downstairs for the covers, he put them back on the bed.

After all that work he took a huge breath and plopped down on the clean floor looking around pleased, the room looked really good if he said so himself, he contemplated putting his clothes in the dresser but left them in the beg next to the bed he also left the stuffed cat in the bag before collapsing on the bed in exhaustion.

He was asleep before his head hit the pillow.

Roy walked into his house half expecting to see it trashed or in flames, something, but what he saw was his house, nothing was changed. He looked into the rooms like the living room and den and kitchen looking for the boy but he wasn't in any of the rooms. Roy checked the ice box to see if the left over food he'd put in there this morning was gone, but it wasn't it was still there. He frowned, had the boy left the room at all? Roy went upstairs and opened the door slowly to see the boy asleep curled into a tight ball, like most people did when they were sleeping scared.

Roy snorted, so the kid was afraid of him? That was good. He should be after the hell he'd unleashed on him in his first life.

Roy closed the door and went to his room to change, then he went downstairs and ate the leftovers, if the kid didn't want to eat what did he care?

Despite his attitude, Roy still left some food, he didn't want to find the moron dead in the morning. Then he went into the dinning room to do the paperwork he hadn't finished during the day, the stupid campaign was going to be the death of him.

Roy looked up several hours later to see a shadow pass in the hall to go into the kitchen, then he heard the ice box open. So the kid did have some self-preservation left. Pity.

A few minutes later there was some shuffling in the kitchen and then the shadow moved back at a quicker pace and disappeared up the stairs. Roy rolled his eyes then looked at his work and yawned, he looked at the clock and made a small noise of surprise, it was one AM, groaning he put his papers away and went up to bed.

And that's how it went for several weeks, Roy barely saw the boy and it was almost like he didn't even exist and Roy really had no problem with that, because whenever he did catch sight of him, the boy was looking at him and then he'd look away when he realized he'd been caught but not before Roy saw the fear in his dark eyes. And when that happened he felt guilty and he didn't like feeling guilt this fresh. He had guilt sure: Ishval; lots of guilt, Maes; even more guilt, but then he looked at Envy and the guilt got so bad it was almost painful. He hated that.

So when one evening Envy came into the dinning room, worrying his shirt in his fingers and not looking up Roy was half tempted to tell him to get out. But he didn't because Envy surprised him.

"Uh...um...I was...wondering...if ...if you'd be okay...with me cleaning the rest of your house?" Envy asked barely above a whisper. And Roy's eyebrows shot up he just stared before remembering the kid wanted an answer.

"Yeah, I don't care," he grunted, and then pretended to get back to work but watched from under his bangs as the kid ran away. He frowned when the guilt got stronger when he left. That didn't make any sense, he sighed and wished that none of this had happened.

Over the course of the next few days Roy saw his house getting progressively cleaner, first it was the den, all of the books were back on the shelves the dirty glasses were back in the kitchen, the floor was clean the mantel was dusted and the fireplace didn't have ashes anymore.

And then the living room, the couch and recliner were cleaner and didn't smell, Roy wondered how he'd managed that one, and then the radio was back on it's stand instead of the floor where Roy had left it after using the stand as a step stool to get to his stash of porn on the top of the book case which Envy had found and left in a corner, and Roy imagined the boy had blushed when he'd found it the man chuckled a little at the thought.

Then all of the empty food cartons from take out were taken off of every surface, the coffee table was again the color it had been when he first bought it. The lamp didn't have cobwebs in it any more and the ceiling was cleaned of them too, and then the den was dusted, Envy hadn't touch his paper work.

Then he'd moved to the kitchen where he'd scrubbed every surface and pot, pan, plate, bowl, cup and utensil he could find. By the end of the fifth week of having Envy living with him, his house was as clean as it had been when he'd first moved in.

Then after he'd cleaned everything he could find, outside of Roy's own room, Envy left a note on the table saying he'd gone to visit the Elrics in Risembool, and Roy frowned, that had been sudden. Not like he cared.

Envy got off the train after the three day ride and rubbed his butt, that had been painful. Then he looked around, it was very green. He smiled it was very nice here, almost calming. He went to the stationmaster and asked for directions to the Elric Automail shop, the man was pleased to give him the directions and then went and mentioned that Ed Elric was a national hero. Envy nodded and smiled before making his way there, looking at the scenery as he went, it was very scenic, green and homey feeling, he liked it.

Envy spotted the shop in the distance and quickened his steps and saw a sign in the front that said 'Elric Automail' and knew he was in the right place, he walked up the porch and knocked on the door, looking forward to seeing Ed or Winry's face, but he heard barking on the other side of the door, and an unfamiliar voice.

"Back Den, Back!" and the door opened to reveal a blond boy who looked like Ed only his hair was short and his face and eyes were softer, and Envy immediately knew that this was Alphonse, Ed's younger brother, and Ed was right. He was taller. Then Envy realized the boy was staring at him in shock and maybe a tinge of horror.

"Oh um excuse me...I'm looking for Ed...or Winry?" Envy asked with a slight bow, and the other male cleared his throat.

"And why would you like to see them?" he asked and Envy felt a little awkward to hear this boy who was supposed to be oh so very kind sound so cold.

"Um I...came to...to visit...they said I could...and I...I..." Envy glanced up at the boys face to also see it looking very cold and then Ed came to the door and saved the day.

"Who is it Al-?" and then he stopped and stared for a moment and then broke into a huge grin before pushing Al aside and gathering Envy into a back breaking hug.

"Envy! See you're not dead! I told you so!" Ed laughed while Envy gasped for breath and Al watched in disbelief as his brother embraced one of their old enemies.

"Not for long!" Envy gasped then Ed released him with a blush.

"Oops, sorry, I'm just happy to see you again, oh here, come in, come in!" Ed trilled happily grabbing Envy's suitcase and dragging him further into the house, Al slammed the door closed.

"Brother! What's going on?" He shouted and then Ed gasped and whipped around to stare at his brother narrowly missing Envy's head with the suitcase.

"Oh man I forgot to tell you! That's really weird! But it's so your fault, going off and proposing and stuff, now you're getting your ass married." Ed said and Al threw his hands in the air.

"Ed! How can you not tell me that Envy is still alive and now you're all buddy-buddy with him?" Al exclaimed and Ed shook his head.

"No, no, here one second, WINRY ENVY'S HERE! COME TAKE CARE OF HIM WHILE I TALK TO AL!" Ed shouted and Envy had to clap his hands over his ears since Ed was right next to him.

"WHAT ARE YOU YELLING AT ME?" Winry shouted back then walked through a nearby door and saw their guest.

"Envy! You came to visit! Oh Nicholas and Trisha will be so happy! They've been whining for you, you know, I think Trisha's first real sentence was 'Mommy where Kitty?'" Winry started giggling then she hugged him.

"How've you been?" she asked and Envy just shrugged smiling, but Winry must have seen something because the corners of her mouth went down. She took his hand and told Ed to take Envy's stuff up to a spare room while she yanked him into the kitchen. Envy saw Ed drag his brother up the stairs while the other male sent him glances.

Winry forced him into a chair then set a glass of iced tea in front of him, Envy sipped the tea before the taste registered and he had to stop himself from drinking it all in one gulp, Winry was a really good cook, he could tell.

"So how're things going?" Winry asked and Envy shrugged and took another drink before speaking.

"I'm a little bored really, I don't have any thing to do..." Envy muttered and then Ed and Al walked into the room, Al was looking at him like he wasn't sure if he believed his brother yet and would judge for himself.

"Sooo how's Roy?" Ed asked with a grin and Envy looked down and missed the frown Ed gave him.

"That bad huh?" he asked more seriously, and Envy nodded sadly he bit his lip, he really didn't want to talk about it, but he knew the others wanted to know, luckily a small blond blur ran into the room and took a flying leap at him.

"KITTY!" the little boy cheered but he was caught mid air by his uncle even though Envy had his arms out to catch him.

"Aaw! Unc'e Al!" the little boy cried in disappointment, but Al was glaring at Envy who put his arms down a little heart broken, he would have loved a hug from the little boy right then, instead there was a tug on his pant leg.

"Kitty..." Envy smiled down at the little girl then leaned over to pick her up. She put her hand on his cheek and he took it and put his finger in it she smiled at him.

"Hey sweetie," he said and she started bubbling at him, he only heard a few words like 'Kitty' and 'Mommy' and 'Daddy' and 'Nicky' which Envy assumed was Nicholas, he pat her head with a smile while Ed and Winry went over to the oven and started talking about food.

"Unc'e Al! I wanna see Kitty!" Nicholas whined and Al looked down at the little boy, he'd been staring at Envy waiting for Ed to freak out that he had Trisha, or for the male to hurt her but he hadn't. He set Nicholas down who climbed up onto Envy's lap who moved Trisha to make room.

"Hi Kitty!" he said and Envy smiled at him.

"Hey Nicholas, how're you? Are you taking care of your sister?" he asked as he squeezed Trisha who giggled, Nicholas nodded and started blabbing away.

"You really are different," Al said and Envy looked up at the man who was gazing at him in disbelief, Envy nodded a little unsure.

"Trisha doesn't take to anyone like that, you really must be different," Al said and Envy looked down at the little girl who smiled at him. Then at the little boy who beamed, he smiled back and pat the boy on the head and squeezed the little girl.

"I'm not really sure how I was before, but my face seems to make people scared or angry so I can understand if you don't like me," Envy said quietly, obviously thinking of Roy, Al frowned and sat next to him.

"So I hear you're living with the Major-General, how is that?" Al asked and Envy picked up on the fact that he knew the two of them had a history.

"Um...define living...?" Envy asked trying to joke but Ed heard and was over in less time than it took for the boy to blink.

"He didn't kick you out did he?" he asked with a hard tone, and Envy figured Roy would be in big trouble if that were true.

"N-no no! He didn't he just...doesn't talk to me...or look at me or acknowledge the fact that I'm alive," Envy said trying to sound flippant but it came out almost bitter and Ed's eyes narrowed.

"Why that bastard, and here I thought it was a brilliant idea and everything," Ed grunted then crossed his arms and glared at the wall.

"Have you tried talking to him?" Ed asked and Envy shrugged giving a finger to Nicholas so he'd stop poking his sister.

"Um...yes?" Envy said hesitantly, and Ed let an eyebrow quirk and Envy blushed, "well I uh asked him if I could clean his house and he said he didn't care...does that count as talking?" he asked and Ed blinked.

"You cleaned his house?" Ed asked sounding a bit incredulous and amused at the same time.

"W-what? I was bored, and have you seen his house? It was a pigsty!" Envy squawked and Ed laughed.

"I have a feeling that was your more feminine side taking over." he said with a grin and Envy's face went pink.

"Maybe..." he muttered and Ed laughed then pat his shoulder, Winry came over and filled his glass with more tea.

"I know how you feel, it's weird ever since I married this slob I can't do anything if the house is dirty," Winry said with a nod and Envy smiled taking another sip of the tea.

"Yeah?" he asked and she nodded again then pat his head before going back to the stove Envy looked at Al who had his head cocked to the side.

"What?" he asked confused and completely oblivious and Envy went even redder than before.

"Uh..Um..." he mumbled and Ed pat his back then looked at his brother with a grin and then squeezed Envy's shoulder.

"Envy's special Al, he's like...how he used to be I guess, androgynous, quite literally!" Ed laughed and Envy frowned, that was one way of putting it.

"Huh?" Al said and Ed groaned then shook his head.

"Oh never mind," Ed waved a hand at his brother then grabbed a chair and sat in it facing the boy, "So Envy I was thinking, maybe you should learn to cook and then he'll not be an ass, you know what they say food is the way to a man's heart and we're trying to get forgiveness in him, it might work," Ed said nodding seriously and Al sighed.

"Envy, I think you should just be around him more, don't push him into anything, just let him get used to you, and being around during meals is good, and cooking should just give you something to do it shouldn't be used as a technique to get you on his good side," Al said with a roll of his eyes at his brother. Who pouted and stuck his tongue out at him in return.

"Yeah...um I guess so..." he said then Winry took the kids off of his lap handed one to each brother then dragged him to the stove and started teaching him how to make stew.

Envy was with the Elrics for a little more than a week, he learned a new dish every day, and felt a bit more confident to go back. He spent most of the time there with the kids because they wouldn't leave him alone, but Al came up to him at one point to really convince himself that Envy wasn't a murderous bastard and Envy even told him his secret, he was pretty sure that was what convinced the younger brother of his change in heart.

It was the last day Envy was going to be there and he was sitting on a hill with his knees to his chest and arms were wrapped around his legs somebody sat down next to him and he glanced over to see Ed who didn't say anything at first and just watched as the sun went down.

"You seem a little down, not as much when you first got here, but you're still down," Ed told him, and Envy shrugged.

"A-are you sure I'm supposed to mean forgiveness for him or whatever? He doesn't seem like he wants to..." Envy said quietly and Ed sighed then fell back on the grass.

"No I'm not sure, but I still think he needs to learn how to forgive and you just seem the type of person hard to grudge against. So I thought maybe you could help, I'm sorry it's not working out. I'm sure it hurts," he said and Envy turned to see Ed looking at him meaningfully. And Envy went a beautiful shade of crimson.

"Is it that obvious?" he asked a little horrified at the thought and Ed shook his head.

"Not really, I had to really think about it in order to figure it out." Ed shrugged and Envy didn't know whether that was a good or bad thing.

"And the fact that he's the only person you remember might have something to do with it," Ed shrugged and put his hands behind his head.

"Yeah well he doesn't seem to like anything to do with me, he goes to work he comes home and he works some more, that's how it is," Envy said and Ed frowned.

"Well then I suggest that when he comes home, you have some food for him or something, it'll show a bit of compassion, and to be sneaky don't say anything, be reading or something in another room so as not to pressure him, kay?" Ed said then he winked, Envy went pink again and groaned but nodded.

"Okay I'll try..." he whispered and Ed sat up and pat his back then he rubbed Envy's head.

"Hey it'll work out, I promise," Ed said and Envy nodded staring at the blond through his messed up hair. He nodded and followed the man back into the house to help with dinner.


	8. Chapter 8

Mmmm...I have a headache, you know what'll make me feel better? REVIEWS!

Find Me

Cha 8: Trying new things

Envy glanced at the door again while he chewed on his thumb nail, he was curled up in the recliner in the living room, there was food on the table in the kitchen for Roy when he got home, he had a book in hand and was attempting to read it but the truth was he was too anxious to read. He jumped when the door opened and he brought the book to his face so he could watch the man walk trough the hall and into the kitchen over the top of the book, and Envy held his breath then heard the icebox open and was positive the man was getting leftovers of the take out he'd had the night before.

Envy didn't let the disappointment get to him, he just got determined to keep cooking until the man ate something he made, that would most certainly be a feat in its self. He narrowed his eyes and decided to keep trying. He waited until Roy was involved in his work before he went back into the kitchen and put the food in the icebox, then went upstairs and read until he fell asleep with the plush cat, that he had deigned as 'Kitty', in his arms.

Envy tried again the next day and the next and the next, but Roy wouldn't touch the food, and now he was getting frustrated. So frustrated he was getting upset with the man, he wasn't eating healthy at all and it would hurt him later on. So that's why one evening, he went into the dinning room and crossed his arms and glared at the man, he stood there until the man looked up at him.

"What?" he grunted then looked back down at his paperwork.

"Why won't you eat?" Envy asked and the man looked up with a raised eyebrow then Envy rolled his eyes, "I mean the perfectly good food that's set out for you at the end of each day?" Envy asked trying hard to keep the hurt out of his voice and the man shrugged and Envy tried not to feel scorned.

"What? Do you think it's poisoned or something?" Envy asked indignant, and from the look on the man's face that was exactly what he'd thought. Envy tried his hardest not to tear up from that, to think this man thought him low enough to poison him was very painful.

"I-if that's what you thought why didn't you ask me to stop?" he whispered now looking down and worrying his shirt in his fingers.

"Would you have?" the man asked doubtfully and Envy nodded.

"O-of course! If you asked me to do anything then I'll do it," he said trying not to get too emotional, but it was hard when you're trying not to cry and Roy's eyes widened for a moment, then they narrowed.

"Really, well if that's the case leave me alone, I have a lot of work to do," he said looking down at the paperwork again, then he thought he heard a sniff he looked up quickly to see the boy turning around and dashing off and up the stairs. He couldn't have possibly made the boy cry...could he? Well that was stupid, boys his age weren't supposed to cry, he should learn to grow up, Roy nodded to himself and got back to work, but the guilt gnawed at his gut all night.

One day the phone rang and Envy wasn't sure if he should answer, but decided he could and take a message even if it meant he would have to talk to the man who he hadn't spoken to in close to two months, though Envy noticed that from time to time, the left overs he put in the icebox would be missing, never the food he continued to leave out because the man hadn't asked him to stop, just the left overs.

Envy walked over to the phone with a little bit of curiosity before picking it up and answering.

"Um Mustang Residence," he said and a female voice replied on the other end he didn't recognize, so it wasn't Riza.

"Oh hello, I was looking for Roy is he in?" the calm and nice sounding female voice asked and Envy couldn't help but smile at it.

"He isn't, may I take a message?" Envy replied, grabbing pen and paper just in case.

"Yes please, I was wondering if Roy wanted to come over on Sunday night for dinner, he hasn't been here in awhile and we miss him," the woman said and Envy frowned so she was offering to cook the man real food was she.

"I'll tell him to be there, may I ask who's calling?" he replied and he heard a small chuckle from his reply.

"This is Gracia Hughes," she said and Envy nodded and wrote it down then an idea hit him.

"Um Ms. Hughes...Can I ask a favor?" he asked tentatively and she replied positively immediately.

"What is it?" she asked kindly and Envy smiled happily.

"Well, I'm Roy's...house mate I guess and he won't eat the food I make, I guess it's not very good and I was wondering if maybe...you could teach me?" he asked and the woman laughed.

"Of course! I would love to, Roy needs to eat more than that dreadful take out, it'll take a lot off my mind to know he's eating better," she said and Envy smiled at his own courage and they set a time where she would come over and would teach him how to cook.

Envy relayed the message to Roy about him going over to Gracia's house for Dinner on Sunday and how he had no choice because Envy was making him go lest the man die by takeout over load, the man had narrowed his eyes and asked how he knew Gracia and Envy said they'd talked on the phone, he didn't tell him about the arranged cooking lessons yet, he wanted to get really good first.

Everyday at 2:30 Gracia would come over and teach him how to cook a new dish and everyday Envy would leave it out on the table and Roy would actually eat it. Envy assumed it was because of the smell, Gracia was a very good cook, better than Winry, and very kind and she said she wanted Envy to meet her daughter because she thought they'd get along great. And Envy asked about her husband and she looked sad then and said he'd been dead for several years and Envy felt sorry he'd asked. He became very good friends with Gracia and liked her a lot but Riza had told him that he needed to come into the office again because the others missed him.

He walked into headquarters and tapped lightly on the door his head popped in nervously to see all of the Major-Generals men working, he cleared his throat and Riza looked up.

"Envy, so glad you could make it," she said standing up and holding out her hand before frowning and then hugging him quickly, Envy laughed lightly and started talking with the others when Roy came out looking a little peeved.

"Your doctor called and said you missed an appointment yesterday," he said and Envy's eyes widened and he gasped.

"Oh no! I can't believe I forgot! M-may I call him back?" Envy asked looking at Roy's shoulder, the man nodded and Envy rushed past him to call the doctor and apologize for his forgetfulness and then to reschedule. He came back out of the office with an embarrassed red face.

"S-sorry," he mumbled and Roy snorted then crossed his arms.

"So what's wrong with you?" he asked and Envy went pale and shook his head.

"N-nothing!" he peeped and Roy's eyes narrowed, the boy was hiding something.

"The doctor said it was a monthly check up, meaning you've had one every month since you were admitted to the hospital and after," he said and Envy shook his head.

"N-no! I mean yes, but it's nothing serious, you can't catch it or anything," he muttered nervously, taking the hem of his shirt in his hands.

"You're living under my roof I want to know if I should be worried," the man said and everyone in the room knew he only wanted to know for his own sake not the terrified boy's who was standing in front of him.

"It's nothing..." the boy said and knew he'd have to tell the man or he would call the doctor and find out himself.

"It's...I...they have to make sure I'm growing right...I...," why had it been so much easier to tell Ed or Al? Was he so worried the man would think of him a freak? "I um...I have extra parts they need to make sure they're growing right..." he said and Riza came over and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Extra parts? Are you okay, is it painful?" she asked concerned and Envy shook his head. Feeling a swell of affection for the blond Major.

"N-no...no, I...I um...have girl parts...I'm half girl, my hormones balance each other out, so I'm half boy half girl," Envy mumbled and looked down at the floor, the room was silent after he spoke before Breda gave a whoop.

"Damn! That must be great! You could do your self!" and he laughed but Havoc rolled his eyes.

"You're a pervert Breda, and that seems interesting...except you don't have the best female part," Havoc looked at the boys' chest and gave a whimsical sigh before glancing at Riza and a bullet whizzed past his head.

"E-envy?" Fury looked at him nervously, "I...do you know, can you get pregnant?" the timid man asked and Envy shook his head no. He saw Falman looking thoughtful.

"I have never heard of such a thing occurring, I will have to do some research to understand it better, would you mind if I asked you a few questions?" the man nodded to himself and asked Envy, who shook his head no again, Riza squeezed his shoulder reassuringly.

"If you ever need any Feminine advice you can always talk to me," she said and he smiled tentatively at her she smiled back then glanced up at Roy and glared at him, Envy looked up as well and felt his heart shatter, the man was looking at him in disgust. Tears immediately welled in his eyes and he looked away before the man could see his face.

"I-I'm going to g-go now...I'll see you later Miss Riza," he whispered and then he left as fast as he could, he faintly heard a pistol firing and a man yelp but he couldn't look back as he ran.

The thought faintly crossed his mind that all of the others had said what they did because they'd seen the look on their commanding officers face and were trying to protect him, he was grateful to them, but despite that, it still hurt to think the man you thought the most of thought you were disgusting.

Envy came home very late in the night, he slipped in the door without a sound and walked past the living room and the dining room without looking in and went up stairs silently he went to his room and fell on his bed, he'd seen Roy look up at him from the corner of his eye, but he couldn't bear to see the disgust again so he'd looked away and kept going.

On his bed he grabbed Kitty and curled up pathetically, he was out of tears so he just laid there thinking he should leave, it wasn't worth it anymore. The man would never accept him or forgive him, he wasn't meant for this. Envy fell asleep wishing with all of his heart he was dead.

Envy's eyes opened blearily as he heard the thuds, he frowned. The thuds repeated, and he looked at the clock, it was 2:38, he gasped and got up. Gracia! He rushed down the stairs and opened the door panting to see the woman standing there looking concerned.

"Envy, I was worried, are you alright?" she asked and Envy nodded then ushered her in before closing the door and catching his breath.

"No-Yes, I'm fine, I just over slept," he said smiling at her but she bit her bottom lip, looking unconvinced.

"Dear you've got tear tracks on your face, what's wrong?" she asked putting a hand on his cheek, his face heated up under it.

"I...nothing...I just told Roy some stuff and he got upset...it's nothing..." he whispered looking down but the woman caressed his face.

"What could be so terrible hmm?" she asked kindly, and Envy flinched, oh there could be quite a few terrible things.

"I'm half girl," he told her, thinking no one's reaction would hurt as much as his did, but she blinked at him.

"Well are you?" she asked and he nodded, she sighed and shook her head.

"He over reacted didn't he?" she asked more to herself than to him, "That man, what am I going to do with him?" she sighed again then pulled the boy into the kitchen. "You know what he did when Maes told him he was getting married? He told Maes he was ruining his life by falling in love, he has a tendency to over react to things he doesn't understand." she said and put the bag of food on the table and started to pull ingredients out.

"Maes?" Envy asked as he started helping, he guessed Gracia didn't have a problem with his problem.

"My husband, he and Roy were best friends, I think Roy had a picture..." she left the kitchen and went to the den and made an exclamation. "Here it is!" she said then brought the picture into the kitchen.

"This was Maes," she said and handed the picture to Envy, and the boy nearly dropped it, it was the same picture that Roy had snatched away the first night, this man, the smiling man with the glasses was the one he'd killed. Envy stared at the picture in horror until Gracia put her hand on his shoulder.

"Are you okay?" she asked worried and Envy looked up at her almost in fear. He took a step back.

"I...Miss Gracia...you...I...You should go, you shouldn't be around me anymore," he whispered, holding back his sobs. He shouldn't be with this woman, this beautiful, kind woman, he shouldn't make her be in the presence of the one who'd murdered her husband.

"What? What's the matter? Why not?" she asked getting overly worried for him and it made him step back further.

"I can't...you...you shouldn't...I...I..." Envy turned his face away from her and tears slipped past his eye lids. "I killed your husband," he choked out and they stood there in silence Envy didn't know how long until arms wrapped around him and he gasped in surprise.

"I don't believe a boy like you could ever hurt someone," she whispered and he shook his head.

"But I did, before when I wasn't a human! I killed him and I looked like you when I did it! Roy told me I bragged about it and so did Ed! They told me and I...I'm sorry but I did!" Envy cried and Gracia hugged him harder.

"That was before Envy, that you may have killed him, but the Envy I know didn't," she said and for some reason that made him cry harder the forgiveness made him so happy he cried in her arms.

Afterwards they cooked up the food and Gracia said she wanted Envy to meet Elicia, her daughter, Envy had been surprised and about to say something but Gracia gave him a look that he didn't want to argue with.

After they made the food they set it out and Gracia had to hurry home to meet Elicia, but she gave him a kiss on the cheek before she left, telling him to keep being strong.

Several moments later Roy walked in the door and Envy was still at the table finishing his own dinner and almost freaked out because he wasn't finished and he usually was by the time the man got home, and he hadn't seen him since yesterday, he froze when the man walked into the kitchen who stopped for a moment before he walked forward and sat down at the table and started eating himself. Envy looked up at him with wide eyes.

The man stopped eating to look back, he sighed a little then put his fork down.

"About yesterday, I'm...sorry," he said and Envy's eyes widened further, the man had never apologized before, and he'd never spoken to him with out sarcasm or a cold tone. Envy stared in utter shock before blushing and responding.

"It's...It's okay...I know I'm strange...I'm sorry I didn't tell you before," he said quietly and Roy nodded slowly, he wasn't really sure how to reply to that. Then he looked back down at his food, and took several bites then he looked up again.

"Where did you learn to cook?" he asked and Envy stiffed slightly and then moved the remnants of food around on his plate.

"Um...Winry taught me a few dishes when I was visiting..." he said and then stood up and put his dirty dishes in the sink.

"Oh yeah?" Roy stood up too and put his own dishes in the sink, Envy faintly noted that Roy was a very fast eater. "Where else?" Roy asked and Envy got the distinct impression Roy was getting suspicious.

"Um...I...I..." Envy, for the smallest moment was going to lie, but he knew he could never lie to Roy. "I asked Gracia Hughes to teach me when she called to invite you over for dinner and she's been coming over everyday since," he breathed and he saw the man go tense and knew then he was going to die again. A hand shot out and grabbed a handful of hair and his head was tilted back to face the furious man, he looked up into the burning obsidian eyes with terror.

"I should have known! You despicable creature! How dare you go near her! How dare you know her name! You monster, get out! GET OUT!" He screamed and he threw the male on the floor, he landed with a thud, then he scrambled away crawling on his hands an knees before getting to his feet and running from the house and out into the night.


	9. Chapter 9

:3 You're happy I updated, but it's short, boohoo...meh. And some of you will be happier, because of the truth of your predictions. Now read and goddammit REVIEW for the love of the gate!

Find Me

Chapter 9: A slap upside the head

Roy heaved and tried to reel in his anger, that little murderer! So he had been trying to get to him through Gracia had he? Well he wasn't going to let that happen, Roy left his house and made his way over to the Hughes, he knocked on the door and Elicia opened it with a happy hello.

"Uncle Roy!" she exclaimed happily and Roy had to force himself to smile and pat her on the head like he usually did,

"Hello Elicia, where's your mom?" he asked and Elicia took his hand and led him to the kitchen where the woman was doing dishes.

"Who was it Elicia? Oh Roy! What a pleasant surprise!" Gracia said as she wiped off her sudsy hands and then walked forward to embrace him.

"Hello Gracia...I came by to tell you that Maes' killer is on the loose again and I came by to protect...you," Roy trailed off as he looked at the woman, she had her hands on her hips and she was glaring at him.

"Roy Mustang what did you do to that young man?" she asked and Roy's eye widened and he stepped back.

"What-" he started but Gracia's gaze became colder and Roy had no idea a gentle woman like her could ever look that mean.

"Envy told me exactly what happened and you must have said something to him didn't you? Now you're worried he wants revenge or something silly like that! Well let me tell you something Roy Mustang, the day that boy kills anyone is the day Maes says he hates being a father! That boy is anything but a murderer! I'm ashamed of you Roy, you should be protecting him, he's in your care and he looks up to you! You need to get your head on right!" the woman poked him in the chest with every word and Roy backed up half terrified half impressed.

"Now you get out there and you find him before something terrible happens to him, or so help me I will make Maes haunt you!" the woman pushed him through the hall and out the door, slamming it behind him.

Roy stood there for several minutes before taking a wobbly step towards the road, what on earth had just happened?

Envy had run until he couldn't breath anymore, and he stopped and collapsed in an alley way, he pushed himself up against the brick wall and curled his knees to his chest and hugged them for comfort as he tried not to cry, but it hurt, it hurt so much! Roy hated him now! He hated him so much he'd called him a monster and despicable! He'd told him to get out! He couldn't look at him anymore that's what that meant, the man hated him and never wanted to see his face ever again. But why would he want to? He was a freak, and he was a monster, there was no way Roy was ever going to accept him.

Envy sobbed into his knees and didn't notice the shadows surrounding him but his head snapped up when one of them spoke.

"Aw what's the matter? Did your boyfriend dump you? It's okay we can make you feel better," one of them said and then Envy's eyes flickered to one of the others.

"Yeah little whore let us feel you!" he cackled and another guy walked over and pushed him aside.

"Well the bitch really doesn't have a choice," the man kneeled down in front of him, "She's in our territory and by right belongs to us now, isn't that right bitch?" he crooned at him and Envy went cold.

"No! I'm sorry! I didn't know! I'll leave! I'm sorry, please!" Envy begged and tried to back further into the wall in fear. But the man just smiled and put a hand to Envy's cheek in an almost affectionate manner.

"Hush now, if you cooperate I'll make sure you're well taken care of," he said with a kindly false tone in his voice.

"N-no! Leave me alone!" Envy said pushing the man away who fell back with surprise then he stood with a glare.

"Big mistake bitch, you can have her," he told his men and some of them gave sick chuckles one of them reached out to Envy who smacked the hand away and then another hand and he kicked out, flailing to keep the hands away but his limbs were caught and he was pulled further in to the alley, he yelled out and he felt hands all over his body and one slipped into his pants and he screamed.

Roy was walking through the questionable part of Central, having decided a few things. The first was that Gracia knew, and didn't care. The second was that Envy had told her, so he believed he was the monster he'd been told he was. The third thing Roy decided was he couldn't hate him anymore, he wanted to so much but he couldn't, it was hard to. The boy was so eager to please him and take care of him, and he was so susceptible to whatever Roy said to him, he was patient and quiet and kind. And he wasn't a monster and he wasn't a freak like Roy had thought when he'd told them he was part girl. He was different but that didn't make him a freak.

Roy sighed as he tried to ignore the great guilt he felt in his gut. He never should have been so cold to the boy, and everyone else said so too, Ed and Riza and Gracia, they all thought he was an idiot now he was sure, and now Envy was sure to be terrified of him. Really after how he'd treated the boy he didn't deserve to look after him, or be forgiven by him. After all he was the monster not the boy.

Just then he heard a scream rip through the air, his stomach dropped he remembered that scream, he'd heard it so many times after he'd snapped his fingers it was embedded in his memory. He quickly slipped his gloves on again, this time with intention of protection not revenge as he went the way he'd heard the scream now hearing a struggle, he went around the corner of an alley, he quickly made himself a part of the wall leaning behind a drain pipe. He looked over to see a group of men holding down a figure with familiar clothes on.

"Hey boss this ain't no bitch!" one of the men shouted as he pulled his hand out of Envy's pants, "He's got a dick!" the man said and the boss, who Roy assumed was the man standing back and only watching, looked thoughtful.

"Well that doesn't change much he's still a pretty face, you can still take him," he said but one of the other men had taken off Envy's pants and underwear by then.

"Hey boss I ain't so sure this is just a boy! Look there's a cunt under his dick!" and the man laughed as he stuck a finger in Envy and Roy was filled with overwhelming rage as Envy cried out struggling harder against the men holding him down.

"Does he really? Well then, it's almost like he was made to be found by us doesn't it boys?" the man asked and the other's laughed, the man wiggled his finger and Envy started crying again.

"Please no! No Leave me alone! PLEASE!" he begged frantically and Roy snapped, filling the alley with flames the men screamed as it touched their skin, Envy wasn't touched because the flames were higher than he was but he still gasped when he saw them, and gasped more when he saw who was walking towards him once the alley had cleared of heat.

"Get away from him." Roy demanded using his military 'no shit' voice, "Or I will incinerate you," he said but it wasn't necessary, once the men saw the blue military uniform they were scrambling over themselves to get away while Envy was left on the ground sobbing, in relief or from the after shock, Roy wasn't sure. But he slowly made way over to him and gathered his pants and underwear, slowly he approached the boy and kneeled next to him. He reached out to touch him but the boy flinched back looking in terror at the white glove on his hand. And Roy almost slapped himself, he took off the glove and shoved it back in his pocket. Then he reached out again and Envy watched him warily as tears continued to cascade down his cheeks.

Slowly Roy pulled the boy to him, and then put his briefs and pants back on slowly before he grabbed the shoes that had been yanked off then put those on too.

"May I carry you?" he asked quietly so he didn't scare him with a loud voice, the boy nodded at him hesitantly, then Roy gently put his arm under the boy's legs and then his back and he lifted him up, Roy was surprised at how light he was before he moved out of the alley way.

Roy briefly thought of just going back home but then changed direction half way and headed towards Gracia's house. By the time they got there, Envy was leaning against Roy's chest, one of his hands clinging to the flap on his uniform while he cried in his sleep.

He knocked on the door and waited a bit then knocked again, moments later it was opened to reveal a robed Gracia, she'd probably been asleep Roy felt a little guilty for waking her but she didn't seem to care, she gasped at the sight of Envy and dragged the both of them inside before closing the door.

"What happened?" she asked then she ushered him into the guest room where she had him lie the boy on the bed.

"I got there just as some gangsters were about to rape him." Roy replied as he took off the boy's shoes and Gracia pulled the covers over him, she looked at Roy with wide eyed shock and horror.

"Oh my gosh! Is he alright?" she exclaimed in a whisper once they had closed the door and entered the kitchen where Gracia put on some tea they both sat at the table.

"Yeah, just in shock I think" Roy replied and took the tea offered to him, then he looked up at the woman, "Gracia, I made a mistake, I thought if I forgave him I'd be tainting Maes' memory, but in the end I just ended up hurting him...and myself, I don't know what to do," he murmured then drug a hand down his face.

"I wish he were still here, he'd be able to set me straight," Roy murmured and Gracia chuckled softly.

"I think I did a decent job earlier, maybe I can do it again," she said and Roy looked up at her, his eyes asking for help.

"You did indeed, though I don't know if I carried out your orders very well...he almost _was_ hurt," he muttered and then Gracia took one of his hands in hers.

"Roy, I've known you for a long time and I know that you always fix your mistakes. This one is easy, all you have to do is talk to him," she said, Roy nodded and Gracia squeezed his hand before he got up to leave, he still had work the next day. He promised to come by the next day for dinner and to pick up Envy.


	10. Chapter 10

Because of needy fangirls I have updated. *pointed look*

Find Me

Chapter 10: Start Again

Envy woke up with a start and then remembered the night before, Roy had been upset with him and then he'd almost been raped and then Roy had saved him. A bit of a brisk over view but that wasn't really what was on his mind. He looked at the ceiling in confusion, why had the man come to get him? Or maybe he'd just been walking by and thought he was rescuing a damsel in distress? But no that didn't seem right, he wouldn't have been walking around that late at night unless he'd been looking for him. He bit his lip, but why?

He couldn't think on it longer since the door to the room opened and a head with pigtails popped in.

"Hi," a little girls voice said and he sat up and she came in all the way, "Mommy said you were probably sad and that I should come cheer you up by saying lunch is ready," the little girl said happily, and Envy figured she was around nine years old. She came over and grabbed his hand.

"Why are you sad?" she asked and tried to pull him from bed, he got up from her insistence and followed her out of the room.

"I just don't feel like being happy," he told her and she frowned at him as she led him to a kitchen.

"That doesn't seem right, Momma I brought him for lunch!" the little girl said and Envy laughed lightly then looked over to see Gracia placing food on her kitchen table

"No Elicia you brought him _to_ lunch we aren't going to eat him silly," she laughed and the little girl nodded seriously, hoping not to make the same mistake.

"Envy how do you feel dear?" she asked coming over to put a hand on his forehead looking over him in worry.

"I'm okay..." he said and Gracia hugged him.

"When Roy brought you to my doorstep last night, I was so sure you were hurt! But he said you might be shocked, are you sure you're okay?" she asked, not wanting to mention the word 'rape' in front of her daughter. Envy nodded then bit his lip.

"Does...Roy hate me now?" he whispered and Gracia took his cheek in her hand and caressed it gently while she shook her head.

"Of course not dear, he said he was coming by for dinner and then he was going to to take you home," she said and she saw hope alight in the boy's eyes and she really hoped Roy didn't mess up again.

"Really?" he asked not sounding too convinced but she smiled.

"Yes, but if not I'll kick his butt into gear, now sit. Eat." she demanded, her daughter pushed their guest into a chair and then started chattering away.

Envy ate and then after he was allowed a quick shower, Gracia forced him into work, making him scrub the floor and wash the walls and rake the yard and pull the weeds until he had to come in and help with dinner, Envy hadn't known what she was doing until he noticed he hadn't thought of the night before once all day because she'd kept him busy. He was eternally grateful to her for that, but then he knew Roy was going to be there soon, he didn't know if he wanted to talk to the man let alone look at him.

But he heard Gracia welcome the man in while he was at the stove, he heard the man's deep voice thank her before they both came into the kitchen, Elicia was hanging onto the man's hand and telling him about her day. How this mean boy had gotten ketchup on her new dress, she had been so upset her friend had beaten him up. Roy chuckled at this, but told the little girl that violence wasn't the answer unless used as a last resort, and Elicia nodded seriously, then said it was a last resort because the teacher hadn't even made the boy say sorry. Roy let out a full laugh then and told her if that was the case then the boy deserved to be tackled to the ground by another nine year old girl.

Envy's back was to them the whole time, as he stirred the sauce and yelped when he realized it was going to start burning soon, he quickly turned off the burner and moved the pot to another one.

"Having problems?" Gracia asked sounding amused, Envy blushed and put the sauce in a bowl with a ladle.

"N-no..." he muttered and Gracia chuckled then took the sauce to the table, Envy turned to see Roy sitting at the head of the table Elicia was sitting adjacent to him, blabbing his ears off. Gracia sat opposite Roy leaving a seat for Envy across from Elicia. He sat down not looking at the man at all, staring at his plate.

He barely ate, and he knew Gracia wasn't happy with him about it, and he could feel the man's eyes on him, he was silent through the whole meal, letting the others talk, even though Elicia did most of the talking.

When Gracia took the plates away to be cleaned in the sink, Envy felt his stomach drop, then he leapt up and squeaked out he would help with the dishes, Gracia sighed and glanced at Roy who gave a half-assed shrug, before handing the boy a dish towel.

Envy tried to dry the dishes as slowly as possible to stall the inevitable but Gracia was fast, and he didn't want to hold her up so they were done in no time at all, and then Roy said he was ready to leave. Envy felt himself start shaking when the man said that, he didn't want to leave, what if he said something that upset the man again? What if he got angry? Envy followed the man out of the door and to the car that was waiting outside, Riza was in the drivers seat and dropped them off, she threw a stern look at Roy and a reassuringly smile at Envy. Though Envy really couldn't smile back, he was too anxious.

When the two entered the house the tension was so thick Envy felt like he wouldn't be able to walk but some how he made it to the couch and sat down rigidly. Roy was standing on the other side of the coffee table in the living room. Envy knew the man was looking at him but he couldn't bear to look back. The man thought he was a weakling, as well as a disgusting freak. He couldn't stop his bottom lip from trembling. He watched Roy's feet since he couldn't lift his eyes further but he heard the man sigh.

"Alright...I'm not good at the whole talking deep thing so first I'll just say I'm sorry for losing it like that," he said and Envy could see that he had one of his arms up probably running a hand through his hair.

"You don't have to," Envy whispered and the man turned toward him full instead of just side ways.

"What?" he asked and Envy wasn't sure if it was because he hadn't heard of he didn't understand.

"You don't have to apologize, you were right, I shouldn't know Gracia, she's too kind...she shouldn't have to be kind to the one who murdered her husband." he said a little louder, but he got quieter at the end and choked on a sob.

"You...I don't think you were really the one who killed Maes, you just look like the one who did. I know that now. You were blamed for some thing you didn't do-" he started but Envy cut him off.

"But I did kill him, I don't remember it, I just know I did it, you have every right to hate me, you weren't wrong," He said and then Roy was over next to him with his chin in his hand making him look directly at him.

"You're just convinced you did because I was, you don't need to be." he told the boy but he shook his head.

"No, I know I did, I can feel it right here, the guilt and the hatred for myself," he whispered putting a hand over his heart and Roy sighed and released him.

"That proves you aren't him, the real Envy didn't have one of those," he said pointing to what was underneath Envy's hand.

"But I was him...in the back of my mind I just know," Envy whispered looking up at Roy his eyes glistening with fear and hurt.

"Well if that's the case...I forgive you," Roy said sounding completely sincere, and he was. Envy's eyes widened and then tears fell from his eyes streaming down his face he put his hands over his face in shame and bent over himself as he started to sob. Roy looked at him for a moment in complete shock, he didn't think his words would have that much of an effect, but now he didn't know what to do, so he decided to wing it. Slowly he put his hand on the boy's back and slowly put a hand on his shoulder and lifted him up and into his arms, he didn't know what to say to make him stop so he figured he might as well just at least let him cry comfortably.

He let the boy sob into his chest who clung to his uniform jacket like a lifeline. Roy looked down at him, the boy looked so fragile like this. So vulnerable, a state in which Envy would never voluntarily show. People could change, they just needed a medium in which to do so.

After that Roy came home to a good meal and Envy would smile at him, a sight that was different but not unwelcome, after just one close moment they were on more friendly terms. Envy started to ask him about his work and what he did, Roy told him it was boring and dull and advised him to never join the military, Envy had laughed. Roy wanted to hear him do that more often, it brought a smile to his own lips. So he tried to make the boy laugh at every chance possible, just because it was so much better than his timid, scared attitude from before he was still a little timid from time to time, but Roy figured that was just a part of his personality

But one night Envy surprised him by being bold. Roy was slumped over on the couch groaning about back pain and how paperwork was a pain in the neck when he felt hands start massaging his back he was surprised but it felt so good he didn't ask the boy to stop, by the end he was a pile of goo all over the couch. And from then on Envy simply gave him a back massage whenever Roy looked tensed or started grimacing when he worked on his paperwork too much. Sometimes Roy just pretended so he could get a good massage.

Afterwards Roy would ask what Envy actually did during the day and the boy would get excited and tell him about all the books he read, which is what he did all day after cleaning, and before cooking. He went to the library every other day and the librarians knew him just as well as they had known Ed, only they would say he was much more polite and friendly, but they'd never tell Ed that. Sometimes Roy could talk to him about the book, if it was one from his own extensive library, also known as Envy's room, then he could talk about it, and he noticed Envy usually talked about those the most just so the conversation wasn't one sided. But from time to time he would get so excited about a book he wouldn't notice he was the only one talking, at those times Roy admired Envy's passion. It was one thing about alchemy but when you can get drawn in and touched by all the things Envy had, it was admirable.

However there was one topic that they never broached, and that was Envy's problem, Roy knew it bothered him, from time to time he was skittish and pulled his shirt down as far as it would go, he would avoid Roy's eyes at those times and Roy wondered if perhaps the boy could get menstrual, but then that would mean he could get pregnant and he had told Fury he couldn't so that couldn't be it. So maybe it was something he saw or read that bothered him, he would ask but he didn't want the boy to get uncomfortable, and he didn't want to either. But he didn't want him to think he was a freak, which he knew the boy thought he was, Roy had heard him call himself that once when he was taking a shower and Roy had been walking past the bathroom. And Roy knew it wasn't true he just didn't know how to prove it to Envy as well.


	11. Chapter 11

In honor of the 69 reviews, I updated...with smut. Yeah that's right 'bout damn time i know. Well anyway. REVIEW!

Side note: I was told the ending to last chapter was awkward...um...how? I'd like to know so I can avoid that in future. Thanks.

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Chapter 11: Manipulated

Roy collapsed on the couch with a groan and Envy laughed as he walked into the living room, and leaned on the back of it next to him.

"You okay?" he asked and Roy shook his head miserably and Envy laughed again then moved behind the older male and started kneading his shoulders.

"Wow, did Miss Riza make you sign every piece of paper in the compound?" he asked and Roy grunted in affirmation, he laughed again and continued to rub his guardians shoulders who eventually started to relax.

"Uuuuhg never again..." Roy mumbled and Envy hummed in question. "She had me do all of my paperwork for this weekend because she wasn't going to let me come in, I don't know why," and Envy started laughing.

"I didn't think you'd have a problem with that and she said she was going to give us bonding time," he chuckled and shook his head before jumping over the back of the couch and landing gracefully next to Roy who looked at him amused.

"Bonding time?" he asked and Envy shrugged.

"I don't know, she told me that we needed it, did you tell her about the incident?" when Roy shook his head he shrugged, "but I'm not even sure how. I know girls bond over make up and stuffed animals and stuff...but yeah," and then he blushed and squirmed a little on the couch. Roy raised an eyebrow.

"You're not worried about it again, I hope," he said looking at the boy critically who blushed, and that told Roy that he had in fact been worried about his dual gendered body. Roy sighed.

"Envy you're not a freak, you're just..." he trailed off and Envy let his own eyebrow quirk sarcastically.

"Special?" he finished sardonically, and Roy rolled his eyes then pushed the boy away gently by the arm.

"You think about it too much," he said and Envy grunted, Roy looked sideways at him to see him fighting with the bottom of his shirt, which he usually did when he was nervous or uncomfortable.

"I couldn't help it...today while I was shopping a girl...she came up and talked with me. Then I realized she was flirting," he said his voice small, Roy was just glad the boy realized the girl was hitting on him, that made him proud in a way, "I thought she was nice and cute and we could get along fine, but then I thought...she probably doesn't want a boyfriend who has a vagina," he said and Roy tried not to show his surprise, and realized, the kid was right.

"Well you need to find someone who can accept you, all of you," Roy said but Envy shook his head.

"Easier said than done. Some people would be able to understand, but I don't think anyone could deal with it up front." he said then turned to Roy, "I remember the look on your face when I told you, you were disgusted," he mumbled and looked away. Roy tried not turn red in shame but his cheeks still went pink.

"Hey...I'm sorry. It doesn't disgust me," he said and the boy looked at him with a cynical raise of his eyebrow.

"Really? You're not disgusted that I have a dick _and_ a cunt? I find that truly hard to believe," Envy said, his voice dripping with cynicism.

"I'm not," Roy said trying hard to believe himself, it wasn't really that the boy disgusted him, he didn't at all in fact, he was very easy to get along with and he took care of him, but it was kind of hard to deal with the fact that his house mate wasn't all male. Envy rolled his eyes then stood up and Roy could see Envy was still hurt by it, and that Roy should have said more. Now that he actually liked the young man for who he was now and not who he had been, he didn't like to see him hurt.

"Hey I'm really not, then I was focusing on you know the old you I saw that as an easier way for me to hate you I guess but now...I think that you're fine the way you are, so you're a different big deal, you're still human and anyone who thinks otherwise is a jerk," he said and Envy stopped and leaned against the recliner while crossing his arms and almost glaring at the older male.

"That's a very nice way of calling me a freak, thanks." he said sarcastically and Roy crossed his own arms and glared right back.

"I did not say that, you're different from everyone else but that doesn't make you a freak," Roy replied trying to keep his calm, but Envy scoffed, irritating Roy.

"Prove it. Let's just face the fact that I'm going to die alone and unloved, just like before only this time I'll be a fucking virgin. So why don't you just prove I'm not a goddamn freak!" he snapped and Roy sprang up.

"Envy-" he started but Envy whipped around and started to make way to his bedroom.

"Just forget it Roy," he said quietly and Roy knew that the teenager was crying as he went upstairs. The only real problem with Envy's extra body parts was that it was accompanied by extra hormones which made it easier to make Envy cry, much easier than most boys, and that's the only thing that bothered Roy: the tears, he didn't know how to handle them. But he didn't like the idea of the boy sitting in his room crying alone.

He walked up the stairs and to the room with a sigh and raised his fist to knock, he could here the small sobs on the other side of the door, and strengthened his resolve when he felt it try to weaken. He tapped on the door gently.

"Hey Envy I'm coming in," he said loud enough the boy could hear just as he put his hand on the knob and opened the door, he heard Envy scramble away from the door as it opened and Roy figured he'd been up against it and now his back was up against his bed, Roy crouched in front of him.

"Hey, you know I don't think of you like that, and no one else in the office or the Elric's, or Gracia does either, we all care about you, we most definitely don't think you're a freak," Roy said softly and Envy nodded but he wouldn't look at Roy in the eye.

Roy took his chin in one of his hands and forced the boy to look at him, there were tear tracks on his cheeks and still more spilling over, but his eyes didn't look convinced, and Roy remembered he had demanded for proof.

"You are not a freak," he said and before he could stop himself he kissed his young house mate, who gasped in surprise opening his mouth for the older man who took that to his advantage and plunged his tongue in. exploring the moist cavern, swallowing the small gasps and moans the boy was making. They broke apart a moment later Envy was gazing at him, like he couldn't believe that had happened.

"How's that for proof?" he asked a little winded himself, and Envy snorted and looked away blushing, putting his hands on Roy's shoulders to push him away.

"Any old bastard can kiss me, still doesn't mean he's not disgusted with the part that matters," he said and Roy's eyes narrowed then he stood up dragging the boy up along with him, then he pushed Envy on the bed who fell back with another gasp only to have the older man on him right as he did.

His mouth was invaded again, and then moments later his shirt was pulled off and hands were roaming over his chest and stomach, his skin broke out into goose flesh, he wiggled at the new sensations and gasped louder when a mouth took one of his overly sensitive nipples. The hands brushed over his stomach again before wandering lower squeezing a still clothed thigh, Envy let out a whoosh of air and tensed as the pleasurable feeling went straight to his groin, exciting both parts.

Roy inhaled quietly as he slowly opened the black pants, he knew if he was going to prove to Envy he wasn't a freak, he'd have to pleasure both parts, the only problem was he'd only ever been with women. He had of course pulled himself off more times than he could count, so why not just do what he knew?

He slipped his hands into the pants and realized the boy was still wearing briefs, he tried not to make himself look like a complete fool so he tentatively brushed against the boys member, and he moaned. Roy decided then he might as well finish it, so he pulled down the pants, tossed them off the bed and then pulled off the briefs, they joined the pants on the floor.

Roy looked at him for a moment, it wasn't terrible and it wasn't deformed, if no one saw him from underneath they wouldn't know he had an extra hole in his body, then he put his hand on the boys stomach again, running it down brushing over his member and then the clit. The boy whimpered and arched into his touch.

"P-please...please!" he cried and Roy complied he pushed a digit into the hole and thrusted it a few times before adding another and then bending his fingers, he pressed gently and the boy cried out, tossing his head to the side and clutching the sheets, Roy couldn't help but smirk, he always got a woman's g-spot on the first try. Now came the part he wasn't so used to, he wrapped his hand around the decent sized member and the boy cried out again, so Roy assumed he was good so far, then he started to pump and the boy arched into his hand moaning and gasping. Roy was proud of himself, he'd done this to the boy and he was going to do more.

He stopped pumping for a moment and Envy made a small whining sound in frustration, then Roy smirked and started working both, he pumped his hand at the same pace that he thrusted his fingers into the boy's vagina, making sure to hit that sweet spot. It didn't take that long until Envy arched and tensed and he came. Both parts spilling the white substance of Envy all over Roy's hands.

Then Envy fell back on his bed panting, his whole body shivering in the after waves of pleasure , there was a nice sheen of sweat covering his body and Roy was looking at him and feeling his adrenaline falling, and then he started feeling disgusted with himself. He shouldn't have done that, the boy was seventeen and he was 39, there was too much of an age gape, not to mention Envy was mostly a boy and Roy did prefer women, well at least when it came to sex. He did like Envy he liked him a lot, he cared for him and didn't want to see him hurt. But he still shouldn't have done that.

"I shouldn't have done that," he whispered and Envy looked at him in shock then he looked crushed, and Roy had to look away, he stood up and was about to leave when Envy grabbed his hand.

"N-no! Please don't blame yourself! I-I pushed you to do it, I'm sorry, you can blame me. Please...I..." and Envy looked down dropping Roy's hand the older man saw him start crying again. Stupid girl hormones...he shook that thought from his head.

"It's not your fault Envy, I shouldn't have done it because I'm 22 years your senior and I should have better control of myself, I shouldn't have done that...It makes me a pedophile." he said and Envy shook his head.

"No. No. It's...I did it. You... I've wanted you to touch me ever since I knew you were real, even before, I dreamt about you...I...I was in love with you before I even knew your name." Envy whispered and Roy's eyes widened and then Envy got on his knees and reached for Roy, "and then when I met you and got to know you, I fell harder, even when you hated me, even when you hurt me and yelled at me, I still loved you. And now when you're nice and laugh and smile, I thought...I thought maybe you could too. But I knew that you wouldn't...so I...I...I'm sorry...I..." and he fell back to the bed turning away from the man in shame. Roy walked forward then kneeled on the bed and took the boy's chin again.

"You manipulated me," he said and then Envy let out a small sob as he nodded, tears falling onto Roy's fingers. Roy knew that was because Envy had manipulated him and gotten away with it, just like the Envy from before. The only difference was that this Envy felt guilty.

"It shows just how much I care for you that you are able to get away with it," he said and another tear fell from Envy's eye, Roy's thumb came up and wiped it away.

"Please don't cry, I'm not going to kick you out or shun you or anything," he murmured and wiped another tear away. Envy gazed up at him hopefully and Roy sighed.

"I know this is probably going to end badly and I really don't want you to get hurt...but I really don't like you crying...so...I can try...being with you, okay?" Roy asked and he saw the way Envy's eyes lite up and knew this was a mistake, but hoped that it wasn't because that look was so much better than anything else that Roy had ever seen. And it made him feel happy, it made him hope that eventually this would work.

(NOTE: _Real_ hermaphrodites...can't do that, they're pretty much sexually screwed, and not in a good way. :( sad for them I know.)


	12. Chapter 12

I don't know if you guys have noticed or not...but I UPDATE every time I get a certain amount of REVIEWS. The more reviews I get the more chapters you get, geddit?

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Chapter 12: Smiling

Roy noticed that everyday Envy was smiling much more, smiling at _him_. And every time the boy smiled Roy wanted to kiss him, and then some. And that was something, for an average horny teenage boy, he never pushed Roy into anything, and he figured it was because of the guilt from the first time so Roy had to kiss him, at first it was usually just a quick kiss on the cheek before he went off to work, and it looked like now the boy simply woke up just for that kiss and to wish him a good day, Roy was sure he went back to bed afterwards. But he was always there when he came home with a freshly made meal he'd learned from Gracia, and Roy would be so grateful after the long day Envy would get another kiss. Roy was okay with that, but he knew Envy wanted more, but he would never ask.

Roy was pretty impressed by that and even though he wasn't sure he should, he knew he wanted to take the boy, despite his extra appendage, Roy wanted him, he wanted him badly. Truthfully, that fact alone kind of weirded him out, but in the end he figured it made things easier if he wasn't disgusted by the boy, hell wasn't that what brought this on in the first place?

There was no doubt that, now that he looked at him, Envy was beautiful, his long hair was usually tied back, sometimes in a high tail or a low braid, it was a lovely contrast to his unblemished pale skin that was so smooth he was easily mistaken for a flat chested girl, he was also always clean and good smelling and his eyes always glittered whenever he set his eyes on the older man. But Roy wanted to see him on a bed his hair splayed over the sheets, his pale skin with a sheen of sweat and his eyes full of lust while Roy pounded into him, hearing those beautiful gasps, cries and moans, he knew the boy would make come out of those plump pink lips. Oh how he wanted to, but he knew he shouldn't. Though everyday he looked at the boy, smiling at him and laughing, it was getting harder and harder to resist and listen to reason.

It was ridiculous this lust he felt, his libido was taking over his mind and sooner or later, the lust was going to win out.

o0o0o0o

Roy was in the office, moaning and groaning over the atrocities of paperwork when Envy walked in wearing tight black pants and a form fitting red tank under a black jacket, Roy felt himself grow hard at the sight. He felt deep down that he was sick for even letting himself stare, but Envy was just so beautiful right then he couldn't help himself. Envy had his hair tied back, up in a high tail and some of it was falling over his shoulder, he flicked it behind him and his eyes were sparkling in _that_ way, the way that made Roy just want to take him then and there. Envy's pink lips were smiling at him as he spoke.

"Hey, I brought you lunch because I've decided you're not allowed to eat in the cafeteria any more," Envy said breaking Roy from his trance as he stared at his eye candy.

"Oh? And why is that?" he asked and Envy smiled then set a home made lunch on Roy's desk, moving to stand next to it, his hands on his hips.

"Because it's crap," he said and Roy shook his head in amusement, but couldn't keep his eyes off of the boy. His hips were just calling to be rubbed, his waist to be held, his shirt to be discarder. Roy felt his resolve break, oh how he wanted the boy right then.

"Well, as much as I'd love to eat this lunch you brought me I think there's something else I want to eat first," Roy said, his voice dripping with innuendo, and the boy didn't catch it which Roy thought was really kind of cute. To hell with reason, the boy was a walking sex magnet and he wasn't about to let some random sleaze off the street take him.

"What's that?" he asked looking as innocent as a baby deer and Roy had to stop himself from laughing as he grabbed Envy's hand and pulled him around the desk.

"You," he replied then pulled the boy onto his lap and took his lips, plunging his tongue into the open mouth since the boy had gasped. Envy pulled back after a long dance of tongues and wandering hands, Roy's hands had ended up under his shirt and he was flushed as he straddled the man his own hands clutching to Roy's uniform.

"A-are you sure?" he panted looking over at the somewhat closed door and Roy groaned, oh yeah they were in a semi-public place.

"The office always spoils my fun..." he muttered and Envy snickered then kissed him on the cheek regaining his breath and making his clothes look like he hadn't just been molested by the older man.

"I'll see you at home then," he said then got off of the man's lap but not before he took the boy's lips in another heated kiss.

"Yes you will," the man grinned and Envy turned red then scurried out of the room. Roy had never wanted five o' clock to get there so fast ever before as he did then.

o0o0o0o

Roy walked into the house welcomed by the sound of singing coming from the kitchen, he was slightly amused as he walked through the house. He went to the kitchen door to see Envy singing along with the small radio on the counter, he had his hair tied in a braid and was wearing an apron. Roy grinned and watched as the boy started dancing to the song throwing his arms out to the side with a sponge in his rubber gloved hands before he brought the sponge back to the sink.

He went around the kitchen with the rubber gloves on scrubbing things with the sponge or picking them up and using it as a microphone. Roy didn't know how long he'd been standing there watching as the boy's hips swayed and his hair moved along with his hips, when the boy spun around and spotted Roy in the doorway, his face went red and he dropped the sponge and scrambled to pick it up.

"How long have you been standing there?" he squeaked in embarrassment as he tugged off the rubber gloves and tossed them by the sink along with the sponge, Roy laughed and shrugged as he stalked into the kitchen.

"Not very long, though I did like your rendition of Charles Mensch's 'Morning Glory'," he said which told Envy he'd been there for a really long time.

"Oh my god..." the boy put his hands to his face then Roy laughed again and stepped up to the boy taking his hands in his own pulling them away from his face.

"Don't be embarrassed, it was cute," he said as he backed the boy up against the counter, who was looking at him with wide eyes.

"But I was acting like a girl," he whispered pitifully and Roy laughed then kissed his forehead.

"Well guess what, you are a girl, partly, it's not a bad thing to do the things you feel like doing," he murmured as his lips went down Envy's neck who shivered in pleasure.

"And are you doing...what you feel like doing?" Envy asked breathily as Roy took one of his ear lobes into his mouth. Envy gasped and then hands were on his ass and he was pulled closer to the man, feeling his growing erection before being lifted up and put on the counter. Roy stepped forward right up against him in between his legs.

"Mhmm," the man hummed as his lips traveled over the boy's cheeks then to his lips. His hands running over the top of Envy's ass again and then his thighs.

"When you came into the office today, wearing those tight pants," he ran his hand to the inside of the boy's legs brushing over the member and womanhood inside. "I had to stop myself from taking you right then on my desk, with the others just in the other room," he whispered against panting lips the boy arched against him and cried out as the hand cupped him and teased the wetting womanhood through his pants.

"Oh...please...oh please R-roy! Take me...please...I'll never want anyone else...please!" he begged, and Roy was surprised for a moment but then he took the boy's mouth thrusting his tongue in as he took off the apron and threw it on the ground, then Envy's shirt joined it, Envy's own clumsy hands worked on his uniform, he broke away for a moment to help him shrugging off the jacket and then the undershirt. But then Roy took a deep breath and slowed down, he attached his mouth to the boy's neck. His hands started running over his chest and stomach and back and sides. Feeling the boy shiver in delight as he cried out, his body breaking out into goose bumps his arms wrapped around Roy's neck gasping in the man's ear making him harden painfully.

"I love you..." Envy breathed and Roy shivered that had been the most erotic thing he'd ever heard, he'd heard that phrase from various people over the years but never had it effected him so. He took the boy's mouth again, taking off his pants followed by his own. Then his fingers moved down to the boy's female entrance sticking them in and finding him already wet. He brushed against the g-spot briefly for good measure he heard Envy let out an enticing 'Ah!' then he pulled back.

"This might hurt," he warned and Envy nodded as Roy put his hands on the boys' thighs to widened his legs up on the counter, pulling him closer and lined himself up taking the boy's member in his hand making him gasp and buck forward onto Roy's own member, he moaned and backed up then lined up and pushed in slightly. Envy started panting in anticipation and then Roy pushed harder and he felt the boy tense and cry out in pain and he knew he'd broken through his hymen. He pulled back to see a single tear drop from his closed eyes, he wiped it away and Envy opened his eyes, looking at him.

"You are mine," Roy whispered and then leaned in and kissed Envy gently as he pushed the rest of the way in, up to the hilt and began pumping the other member. Envy moaned into the mans mouth all pain forgotten as he felt the pleasure on his member. Roy pulled out again before pushing in at a different angle, Envy cried out, his nails dug into Roy's shoulders as Roy set a pace hitting his g-spot, pumping at the same rate as his thrusts, speeding up as he felt the tight cavern around him pulse with heat. He had to support himself on the counter as his thrusts sped up erratically, he changed his angle again and pulled the boy closer so his face was in the crook of his neck and the man could hear his pants and moans and mewls of pleasure, which served to drive the man insane until he squeezed the boy's member and plunged into him harder hitting his g-spot roughly. Envy clutched onto him throwing his head back as he came. Roy thrusted several more time before he cried out too, then he put his forehead on his lovers shoulder to catch his breath. Arms came up and hugged his head.

"I love you," Envy breathed into the older man's ear again, Roy pulled back then took the boy's chin in his hand and brought him closer for a deep kiss. He couldn't say he loved the boy too because he wasn't sure if he did, he cared for him a great deal, but he didn't think he was allowed to love. Not after everything he'd done.

He pulled out of the boy who flinched in pain, Roy looked at him in sympathy and in apology but the boy smiled at him, almost glowing, so he figured the boy was very happy about what had just happened on the kitchen counter, Roy took him off of the counter shaking his head in amusement as he pulled him along for a shower. They both needed one.

After the shower Envy went back to the kitchen and made dinner, after cleaning up of course, and Roy was sure the blush was going to be permanent now. Every time the boy looked at him he went red and Roy would smirk. But still, he may have been proud of the fact that he was Envy's first, but he wasn't sure if he had a right to be, the kid was so young.

"Envy?" he asked while they were sitting at the table the boy looked at him, his cheeks going pink.

"Yes?" he replied and Roy was impressed by his ability not to stutter he was so sure he would, he was a little disappointed, it was cute in a way.

"Are you...upset with what happened?" he asked and Envy's eyes widened and he shook his head then he looked at Roy a little sadly.

"Are you?" he asked and Roy hadn't expected that, his eyes widened as he considered the question.

"Well I don't regret it, if that's what you mean, but I'm not sure if it's right. You're so much younger than me, technically you're still a minor, I could go to jail," he said and Envy nodded, and then chewed his lip.

"So you would mind...if we did it again?" Envy asked and again Roy was surprised, he really hadn't expected that. In all honestly he had enjoyed it despite the moral dilemma he was fighting inside and he would like to do it again, many times in fact.

"No. No, I wouldn't mind, but we'd have to keep it quiet until you're eighteen, when you're legally an adult...when is your birthday?" he asked and Envy shrugged but he was smiling.

"I don't know officially but, the doctors put down the date I was first found," Envy said then looked at the calender on the wall.

"So in about four and a half months." Envy said and Roy blinked, had he really known the boy for that long already?

"Wow, well that's not too long, makes me feel a little bit better...a little," he mumbled and Envy frowned.

"Do...do you not want me anymore?" he asked quietly and Roy shook his head adamantly.

"No, no that's not it at all, honestly I'd do you again right now if I didn't know things about the vagina men usually aren't supposed to know, like after her first time a woman needs a week for her vaginal muscles to relax and heal." He said and ignored the boy's incredulous eyebrow raise, "No that's not it, I'm just having moral issues," Roy said really fast to make Envy feel better, who had shaken his head at the female anatomy fact and then wasn't really surprised, this was Roy Mustang after all.

"So basically, you're just saying...I'm too young?" he asked and Roy nodded.

"Yeah basically," he replied and Envy nodded then tapped the table with the end of his fork, then he looked up at the man.

"Uh-huh, well would it make you feel better if you remembered that I'm technically older than you? By about ohh...a few centuries?" Envy asked with raised eyebrows and a small smirk and then Roy's eyes widened.

"You know...it does, but at the same time it really doesn't, I think I'm just going to tell myself this is a part of the healing process, Ed told me you were here to heal me right? And why not through something I love," he said then Envy shook his head with a laugh.

"Man whore," he said and Roy's jaw dropped, that was definitely something he thought he'd never hear come out of Envy's mouth.

"Hey that was a while ago," he said and then Envy smirked, his eyes glittering with mischief.

"About five years ago, old man," he said and Roy went pink, then he spluttered and pouted. Envy started laughing then he stood up walked around the table and hugged the older man.

"Are you sure you're the older one? You're acting awfully childish!" he sang and then Roy grunted and grabbed the boy's arms and tugged him into his lap, the boy yelped then looked up at him in surprise, Roy smirked down at him.

"Maybe so, and for my next childish act I will whine until I get a kiss," he said and Envy rolled his eyes

"That was really dumb," he said before pushing himself up and connecting their mouths, his own immediately submitting to the more experienced one slanted over his. The slow tongue dance ended and they broke apart panting, black eyes looking into another pair of glazed black ones,

"Will you sleep with me tonight?" Roy asked and Envy smiled and nodded his head then rested it on Roy's shoulder while the man held him.

That night in bed with Roy's arm around his waist and his face snuggled into the man's chest Envy felt so happy to be alive he was sure he slept through the whole night with a smile on his face.


	13. Chapter 13

It's short but...you'll see why. Oh and Review please and thank you!

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Chapter 13: Surprises

Everyday since their first time together Envy would bring in Roy's lunch and he would cajole the boy into his lap, and they would tongue wrestle until Envy would get too scared of getting caught, and Roy knew it wasn't because he wouldn't be embarrassed, it was because Envy was worried about him getting in trouble, but Roy was starting to like the thrill and danger of getting caught, he was almost looking forward to it.

Everyday he was getting Envy distracted longer and longer. First it had started with a few exchanged kisses with Envy on his lap, then Roy had managed to get his hands into Envy's pants teasing him mercilessly with his fingers. Envy had bitten his lips so hard that day to stop himself from crying out it had bled. Roy had felt a little guilty from that and made it up to him at home, which happened quite a bit. But Envy didn't really seem to mind.

Then Roy had managed to get the boy on his desk while he was on his knees, now using his tongue, this time Envy bit into his hand while he was teased and then heard some one about to come in. He had his pants back on and he was on the other side of the desk faster than Roy could put his tongue back in his mouth. Moments later Riza walked in with some more paper work, it took Roy days to get Envy back to that point, and he had to work really hard to not feel any resentment towards his blond Captain.

It was a Friday and Roy was determined to get his own pants off this time, Envy was on his desk again his pants on the floor and legs spread while Roy's tongue did lovely things to his woman hood. Roy would have tried giving him a blow job but he'd never actually done it before, might as well keep to what he knew. So he kept his hand on the boy's member stroking it slowly and his tongue teasing his clit until he could feel him getting wet. He stood up and unbuckled his pants pulling his member out, which was much too hard.

"N-no...we...we shouldn't..." Envy panted gazing up at Roy who looked disappointed before he smirked and went over to his door, still free as a bird so Envy was watching the whole time as he silently clicked the lock on the door, he didn't know why he hadn't thought of it sooner. Then he turned around to look at Envy a triumphant smirk on his face and his eyes blazing, from the way he shuddered Roy was sure the boy had almost come just from that look alone.

But he wouldn't have it, he was back to the desk in less time it took for him to take the boys mouth again, roughly pulling him up for a few moments of tongue on tongue action before pushing him flat on the desk and lining himself up.

"I've been wanting to do this since the first time you know, I'm not giving this chance up," he whispered as he leaned over the boy who was gazing up at him, lust clouding his vision as Roy entered him, Envy made a mewling noise and started to pant, he put his hands at Roy's shoulders fisting in the material, Roy watched the boy's closed eyes and sweating face as his chest started to heave and his hands gripped his uniform so tightly he feared it might rip. He pushed in all the way then bent over him and took his lips, pulling out and thrusting in just as he did the same with his tongue, swallowing the boy's gasps and moans as he started thrusting in and out knowing they didn't have much time so he sped up the pace. And then he heard several voices in the room outside the door, and one of them sounded familiar and then there was a really loud young voice. They broke apart so Roy could glare at the door.

"Oh no..." Envy gasped he clutched at Roy, his legs wrapping around his waist urging him on faster. Roy knew he was enjoying it too, but it was just their luck the Elrics decided to come by for a surprise visit.

"Roy..." he breathed and the man took the boys mouth going faster they couldn't go out their unfinished it just wouldn't work so he sped up and he felt the boy tense and he came crying into the man's mouth. Roy was careful to catch the come from his member in his hand so it wouldn't soil his uniform, and then the heat around his own pulsed and he came, also crying into Envy's mouth. Then they sat there for a moment breathing deeply until they heard someone mention them, they were back in their proper clothes looking tidy and Envy was at the door opening it just in time to catch a little blond boy.

"Hey Nicholas," he said smiling, and the little boy hugged him, then there were arms around his leg and he looked down to see Trisha.

"Hey Trisha," he said to the little girl who smiled up at him then she extended her arms up towards him.

"Kitty up please," she said and Envy laughed, she was very polite for being only two years old.

"Kitty guess what?" Nicholas asked excited, and Envy looked at the little boy, Envy was too preoccupied to see Roy come out of his office and excuse himself to the bathroom. But some of the others weren't.

"What?" he asked the little boy as he bent down to pick up the little girl in his other arm and rest her against his hip.

"I'm Five!" he said excitedly, and Envy smiled at him.

"Wow, that's amazing you're so old now!" he grinned and Nicholas looked pleased by the response.

"Hey there Envy how's it going?" Ed asked and he was smirking, as to why Envy wasn't sure but he smiled back anyway.

"I'm good how are you and Winry? Where is she?" he asked and Ed sighed then ran a hand through his hair.

"She's back in Risembool, she had a last minute repair she had to do but she sends her love," Ed said and Envy nodded.

"Well tell her I say thanks," Envy smiled and Ed nodded then looked at him suspiciously, Envy blinked and backed away.

"W-what?" he asked, half tempted to put one of the kids in front of his face, Ed couldn't possibly know? Could he?

"Oh nothing I was just wondering what you and Roy were doing, you two were in there for a while before coming out," he said grinning, his eyes twinkling Envy went pink. Oh god he did, or he suspected anyway.

"N-nothing! We were just talking!" he peeped and Ed smirked, he didn't believe him, Envy went even more pink.

"Uh-huh, why do I find that hard to believe?" Ed asked crossing his arms over his chest, and Envy could feel all of the other people in the office looking at him in confusion. But luckily he was saved.

"I don't know Ed, why?" Roy said from the doorway, and Ed whipped around to look at him then he put one hand on his hip while the other pointed at the other man.

He opened his mouth to accuse the man of something but then a lieutenant ran in and saluted at Roy before handing him a note. Roy opened the note and frowned at it for a long while until Ed came over and grabbed it from him.

"Edward, that is classified information, you aren't in the military you aren't supposed to-" he started but Ed had already read it.

"WHAT?" he screeched at the little slip of paper then he looked at Envy then at Roy and then back at the paper. "That's impossible!" he said then he looked at Envy, "You don't have a mom," he said and Envy's eyes widened.


	14. Chapter 14

I don't know if you guys have noticed or not but I update Every FIVE reviews, not a bad deal if you ask me.

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Chapter 14: Mother & Father

"Ed, that was rather harsh," Riza reprimanded and Ed went pink then muttered a quiet sorry, Envy just blinked then he put the two children he had in his arms down.

No, it was true he didn't have a mother, he knew that. But for some reason it made him feel so happy to think so. He walked over to Ed and took the note, it said something along the lines of a woman named Dante Alighieri was demanding to see Roy so she could take her son back.

"I wonder what she wants with me," he muttered looking at the words on the paper, but another hand came over and took the paper easily. Envy looked up to see Roy there.

"I don't know, or care. But she's not taking you away if I have anything to say about it." he said and Envy smiled.

"Thanks," Envy said quietly but Riza stepped in and put a hand on his shoulder, looking hard at Roy.

"Sir, if Envy truly does have a mother then we have no business keeping him from her," she said but Ed spoke up again.

"But Riza, he doesn't have a mom, he can't have. He shows up one day out of the blue with no records, wearing the face of one of our enemies, not to mention only remembering Roy's face, who ever this woman is, has to be lying. There is a possibility that there was a person who looked like Envy, but the fact that he remembered Roy rules that out. When you get killed by someone a countless number of times it tends to make an impact on ones psyche," Ed told her and Riza sighed.

"He's right, when I woke up in that warehouse, I was as close to a baby as anyone else would be at the beginning of their life." he told them keeping his eyes off of people out of embarrassment, he kept his eyes on Roy's chest. "When I first woke up I couldn't talk and barely move, that's why they thought I was hurt, but after watching everyone else move for a while I could too, and it was the same with talking, luckily, I just had to stare at the pages of a book and then it started to make sense. That's where I learned everything. None of the doctors noticed because it happened so fast," Envy told them and knew they were surprised.

"So you were born as a seventeen year old boy?" Ed asked and Envy looked at him with a nod, then Ed laughed. "Oh man I feel sorry for the woman who had to push you out!" He started howling with laughter along with Breda and Havoc who stopped the moment Riza's gaze fell on them.

"No, I was born from alchemy, or at least I was brought here by it," he said and Ed stopped laughing to look at him wide eyed.

"Say what?" Ed asked looking a bit too serious for Envy's liking, "Envy if what you're saying is true then that means you aren't exactly human," he said and Envy smiled at him a little sadly.

"Was I ever? It only makes sense that when I was reborn or whatever, that it wasn't naturally, I remember the feel of the transmutation, there was a hand and I grabbed it and then I was on the floor of the warehouse," Envy reminisced, sharing something with them he barely remembered himself. He looked up at Ed who was looking at him as if not really seeing him, he was deep in thought and then he snapped his fingers.

"I think you were the result of a failed Human transmutation, but whoever it was was prepared to give everything they had in return for their lost loved one hence why you're not all...gooy." his fingers moved a bit at the description before he moved on, "Too bad for them, it's impossible to bring back the dead," Ed said and Envy cocked his head to the side.

"But why me?" he asked and that was a question no one could answer, they were all sitting in silence when the door was nearly broken down.

A woman with brown hair in ringlets, wearing a fancy suit with several rings on and heels pushed her way in to the room followed by two low ranked soldiers trying to keep her back.

"Let me through! I am speaking to the man whether you like it or-" she snapped at them then gasped when she saw Envy.

"Baby!" she screeched then threw herself at him her arms wrapped around his neck and started sobbing into his chest, "I was so worried! I thought you were dead! I thought you'd been taken from me!" she wailed. And Envy had his hands in the air, he was looking down at the woman like she was nuts, which she probably was.

"Um...who are you?" he asked and the woman looked up at him looking devastated, her brown eyes glistening in sadness as she pulled away from him.

"Oh baby! I'm your mom! The doctors told me you might not remember and that this man," she turned to glare at Roy who was watching with raised eyebrows. "Told you everything you thought you needed to know! But whatever he told you is wrong, I'm your momma! Salvador and I adopted you when you were just a baby," she told him and Envy knew this woman was lying, he could just tell.

"Excuse me ma'am but could we see proof of this?" Riza asked, Envy felt grateful to her for that, she must have smelled a rat too.

"Proof? I sent his records to your superior's officer, he said I was welcome to take him home at any time," she said and Roy bristled.

"Well I would like to see these records first, I'm not putting him into the care of someone he doesn't know," Roy replied and the woman gasped as if offended.

"Doesn't know? He's known me longer than he's known you!" she yelled at him, but Envy cleared his throat.

"Um I'm sorry Ma'am but I don't know you, I've never seen you before," he told her and the woman started to sob in her hands.

"Oh honey I'm so sorry! If this is about the fight we had before? If you're still upset I'll let Elizabeth stay over longer, I'll even let you close the door! I'm sorry!" she wailed and Envy looked at Roy for help he even mouthed the word.

"Look lady, he's not going anywhere with you, so you can just leave," Roy told her sounding a lot angrier than he should have, but he didn't want to lose Envy, it made his chest clench the thought of not seeing him again.

"Is there a problem Mustang?" everyone in the room looked to see General Hakuro standing in the doorway.

"Sir, this woman has no right to be on Military grounds," Roy said saluting along with all of the other members of the military in the room, the General waved his hand in dismissal.

"She was invited by me, she said she was looking for her son it seems she found him and you're keeping him from her is that right Mustang? That could be classified as kidnapping," he told the younger man who scowled.

"Yes sir," he said between gritted teeth, the man smiled then turned to the woman who was looking a little lost.

"You can take your son home madam," he told her and the woman smiled in thanks then held out her hand to him.

"Come along Joshua, let's go home," she said to Envy who scowled and took a step back from her closer to Ed.

"That's not my name," told her and she looked a little angry before the emotion was gone and she smiled sadly at him.

"Honey-pie these people have lied to you, it's time to come home now," she said and then Roy looked at him and nodded at him once his eyes looking determined, Envy hesitantly gave the woman his hand, she took it and started to drag him out of the room but there was a wail that stopped her.

"No! Kitty! Wait!" and Nicholas came hurtling at him from out of nowhere, his little sister not too far behind. Envy turned to him the woman having to drop his hand so he could bend down and take the two children into his arms.

"Kitty I don't want you to go!" the little boy said clutching onto his shirt.

"No go, Kitty," Trisha said tears starting to fall from her big eyes, Envy felt an overwhelming amount of warmth for the two children he gathered them into his arms and squeezed.

"Hey you two, it's okay, I'm not leaving forever, we'll still be able to visit," he told them and he looked up at Roy telling him the same thing, the man let a small, pained smile grace his lips before the woman put a hand on Envy's shoulder.

"I'm sorry honey but your father is waiting.." she said gently like a real mother would have, he squeezed the two children again and he felt Nicholas start crying too, he closed his eyes, it was okay though it wasn't like he would never see them again. But maybe to them it felt that way. He was being taken away by a stranger after all. Then he stood up and the woman took his hand again. He looked at the others in the room before he couldn't see them anymore.

Then he was following the woman out of the headquarters as she talked away, saying how much she missed him and how worried they had been and how happy they were to have him back and how Elizabeth would be so happy to hear he was okay. Envy sighed, this was so wrong, he was supposed to be with Roy.

Envy stepped out of headquarters with the woman and blocked his eyes from the sun, then she pulled him gently to the gates where there was a car, she pushed him in the back and followed him in not letting go of his hand, like she couldn't bare to part with him again.

"Hello son, I'm so happy to see you again," the man from the front seat, Salvador the woman had called him, he had blond hair and brown eyes, he looked friendly enough, he was certainly emitting a fatherly vibe.

"Uh...sure..." he muttered and the woman smiled at him. They were sitting in silence the whole way back until the woman, Dante, Envy remembered her name was, started talking to Salvador about dinner and how they should have a celebration. They hadn't seen him in over a year so they wanted to welcome him home with a bang.

They came to a very nice neighborhood pulling into the driveway of a white house with a little white fence, then they got out and went inside where there were several people and they all came over to him and told him how happy they were to see him again, and how worried they had all been.

Envy had never seen any of them before.

They stayed there all night, and there was a girl with platinum blond hair who came up to him with a blush. She was wearing a white blouse and a pink skirt her eyes were a beautiful blue.

"Um...Joshua...do you remember me?" she asked and Envy shook his head, staring at her then glancing at the others.

"I don't know any of you, if this isn't some big hoax," he stated and he didn't see any of them react to that, "then I'm not the right person, my name isn't Joshua, it's Envy," he said and Dante sniffled a little.

"Oh that terrible man Mustang has told you lies! My poor baby has been fooled!" she bawled and was over to him in an instant clutching his head to her bosom, he tried his hardest not to grimace.

"Um...or you have..." he said pushing away from her, she let go of him reluctantly.

"Well...that...that may be true, but can't you at least try? I haven't seen my baby in over a y-year and I-I can't bear to t-think something h-has happened t-to him!" she said starting to cry and Envy felt a little guilty, he didn't want to hurt anyone, he just wanted to go back home to Roy.

"You look just like our son, maybe you are him and your memories are just suppressed, and maybe you aren't, but couldn't you please try?" Salvador asked sincerely and Envy sighed, he couldn't say no to that. And all the others, Elizabeth and her parents and the neighbors looked sincere too. It had too many people to be a trick...didn't it?

Roy grumbled at his desk, he glared at the records on his desk, it was Envy's birth certificate and adoption papers, they sure as hell looked real, but Roy knew they weren't, they couldn't be. But they were real enough for a judge so there wasn't anything he could do. Ed had tried looking things up too but couldn't find anything, but something else must have been bothering him because he confronted Roy about it almost immediately after Envy was gone.

"Roy I need to ask you something," Ed sounded more like he was demanding something and not asking. They were in Roy's office and Ed had closed the door and was gazing at the man, his arms crossed and looking like the parent he was.

"What is it Ed?" he'd replied tiredly. Sitting down at his desk and not even caring that it looked like two people had just had sex on it.

"I need to know. Are you and Envy romantically involved?" he asked and Roy was suddenly very glad the boy had learned how to be a little more subtle.

"Why would you ask?" he replied raising an eyebrow and Ed narrowed his eyes at him, before rolling them at the ceiling.

"Politician through and through," he mumbled then glared at the man, "Please, you really don't think I didn't recognize that 'holy shit we just got caught,' look? My son gives it too me all the time, though thankfully for different reasons. Envy was bright red and you went to go wash your hands, not to mention this room reeks of sex," Ed said bluntly and Roy took back his previous thought. Roy looked at Ed for a long while before sighing.

"Yeah we were, not that it matters much anymore does it?" he sighed and Ed blinked, he hadn't really expected Roy to say it outright. And truthfully he wasn't as disgusted as he thought he might be, sure Envy was seventeen and Roy was thirty-nine, but in a way they were a perfect match, perhaps that's why Envy was back. So Roy could forgive himself through love.

"Why am I getting the impression you're relieved?" Ed growled and Roy's eyes snapped to him he scowled.

"And what the hell does that mean?" he asked and Ed snorted and flipped his hair back.

"It means, Roy, you're afraid you're in love with him aren't you?" he asked sneering, "You're too afraid to love him back, I know he loves you. I can just tell. I'm not blind. So tell me Roy how many times has he said he loves you, have you ever said it back? You're too afraid to admit that you do. And now you think you can get out of it now that he's been stolen from your life?" Ed demanded and Roy was shocked, was he really that translucent?

"That's not...I don't..." he swallowed and tried to wet his mouth but everything, even his tongue, was dry. Ed sighed.

"Roy, you can't just give up on him there has to be something about this that we can use to peel back the lies, you're not the only one who loves him you know. Right now Cain and Riza are trying to console my kids because they know Envy was taken away by a stranger. In a way I see him as a part of my family too. All of the people under you also like him, I know they do," He said glaring at the man, "If you're too much of a coward to get him back for yourself do it for everyone else." Ed said more gently and Roy stared at him.

"I want to get him back, I...just don't think he should come back to me." Roy admitted and Ed let an eyebrow raise.

"You afraid he'll leave you or something?" Ed asked and Roy sighed and ran a hand down his face.

"You wouldn't understand, I did things that can't be forgiven, he shouldn't be with me," Roy said then he heard Ed snort.

"Yeah okay, whatever, call me when you pull the pity out of your ass," Ed said waving his hand at the man before sighing and rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, well you didn't commit the worst sin of all, not by your own will anyway, I moved on, you know how? I had people who forgave me, people who mattered, Al, Winry, even you, and then I was able to forgive myself and now I can just live. You can't forgive yourself that's your problem, you need to learn how Roy, or Envy won't come back." Ed said and Roy hated to admit that this kid fourteen years younger than him was right but he was. And not to mention that he knew so much about him, and here he thought he was a private person.

"Fine, I will get him back because that woman looked fishy," Roy said and Ed shook his head and sighed but he smirked and came over to Roy's desk to help him find a way to get Envy back.


	15. Chapter 15

See? I updated and this time I got SIX reviews, and don't you feel happy? Yeah, I thought so. So pretty much...REVIEW!

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Chapter 15: I love you

Envy was getting seriously suspicious of the two people who claimed to be his parents, they were acting very parental to him, like they had in fact had a seventeen year old son before, but it almost seemed...too perfect. The house seemed just right, his room looked lived in and there were even a few pictures of him, he had no idea how they'd pulled that off.

They were happy and smiled at him, they scolded him if he forgot to put his dishes away, which he'd done on purpose to see what they'd do, and his 'dad' was home schooling him, and he worked at night. His 'mom' worked all day and then came home exhausted. Envy had decided there was no reason not to be considerate and started making dinner. They were very surprised and happy about this fact, Envy did whatever he could during the day because he went through 'school' faster than the man could teach so he had a lot of free time. But that meant the girl, Elizabeth filled as much of his time as she could when she wasn't at school.

Envy found it very awkward when she tried to kiss him or get her hand in his pants, he'd grabbed it at one time and almost thrown her away but instead had just told her no. she had looked angry before smiling at him and saying it was okay she could wait. Envy certainly hadn't believed her since she tried again several more times. And no matter how many times he'd told her he didn't like her like that she wouldn't take a hint. Finally he told her he was gay, she had thought he was lying.

At the moment she seemed to be the biggest problem, and Envy figured that she along with his 'parents' had no clue about his extra body parts. But he certainly wasn't going to tell them, if they didn't know they didn't need to know.

Envy eventually managed to get out of the house one day when Salvador had to go into work early, Envy got out and really wanted to go see Roy, but the two adults had forbidden him from ever seeing the man again so he decided to go see Gracia and Elicia.

He knocked on the door tentatively hoping that he'd remembered the address correctly and was happy to see Elicia open the door.

"Envy big brother!" she said happily and dragged him into the house before throwing herself at him. He caught her and hugged her back tightly.

"Hey Elicia, how are you?" he asked and she smiled and told him she was doing great, school had been great that day and it was even better now. And she dragged him into the living room and Envy froze at the entrance to the room and stared then his face broke out into a smile.

"Roy," he said with a grin and Roy looked up from the coffee he was staring at, he stared in shock for a moment before his face broke into a smile and then his coffee was on the table and Envy was in his arms.

"Envy...I was worried," he murmured into the boy's hair, Envy wrapped his arms around Roy and decided he wasn't ever going to let go.

"I missed you," he breathed, trying his hardest not to cry, because he sure felt like crying, he was already tearing up against the man's uniform jacket.

"You better have I haven't seen you in over a month," the man said, his arms tightening around him.

"And he's been crying to me the whole time," a voice said from the doorway, Envy turned his face against the man unwilling to let him go to look, to see Gracia standing there with a smile on her face and a spatula in her hand.

"I have not been crying," the man huffed and Envy laughed then buried his face more deeply into his uniform.

"I have," Envy mumbled inaudibly, he knew Roy hadn't understood what he'd said, but must have just known, he kissed the top of his head and squeezed him.

"Well it sure sounded like it," Gracia said looking at the two of them affectionately, she smiled then turned back to the kitchen.

"Dinner is ready, come on you two," she said and Roy let him go but dragged him along by the hand then looked back at him.

"Gracia is a very smart lady, just as good at observation as her husband," Roy said and Envy blinked before he understood. Gracia knew they were together, and she didn't seem to care. Envy figured it was because she knew what love was like and didn't want to be negative about it and because she wanted Roy to finally be able to forgive himself and let himself love.

"Oh," Envy said and let himself be pushed into a chair at the table a plate of food was placed in front of him.

"So...how are things?" Roy asked a little strained and Envy smirked at him in a reassuring manner.

"Think I might not want to come back to you or something?" he asked and Roy went pink, Envy started laughing.

"I wouldn't be there even if they were my parents, they're really clingy." Envy shrugged and grinned at Roy who sighed and rolled his eyes.

"That's no good, I can't get you out as it is," he muttered and thanked Gracia as she placed a plate of food before him and then sat down to begin her own meal.

"I know you will," Envy told him, completely sure, Roy smiled at him and Envy beamed back. He was really happy to see the man after so long, just being in his presence made him feel happy.

Dinner lasted a little while longer, Elicia talking about school and such, while Roy somehow managed to get a hold of Envy's hand who didn't mind in the least, Gracia smiled at them before she got up and insisted doing the dishes herself. Leaving the two males at the table to listen to Elicia, who finally noticed their entwined hands.

"Uncle Roy?" she asked after a pause the man raised his eyebrows in question at the girl, Envy smiled hearing Roy being called 'Uncle' he thought it was cute.

"Yes Elicia?" he said and the girl looked at their hands again.

"Are you and big brother going to get married?" she asked and the two males spluttered and turned various shades of red.

"Wha-wha-what makes you ask that Elicia?" Roy asked in probably the highest pitched voice he could reach without helium. The girl smiled. (haha sorry I was watching Ouran while writing this and Tamaki had just gone 'I-I-I-I-I hope not!' lol xP)

"Because you and big brother love each other right? And that's what you do, Mommy and Daddy did it," Elicia said as if she thought it was obvious, and both males went darker a darker shade of red.

"Elicia, don't you have homework?" Gracia stepped in before things got even more heated, Roy and Envy wished the girl a good night before she left the table with a small pout. Roy sighed and let his head hit the table.

"She isn't related to her father at all," he mumbled sardonically, and Gracia laughed and set a cup of coffee in front of the man and a cup of cocoa in front of Envy who thanked her gratefully.

"Yes she certainly knows how to read people well, Maes did the same, but he had a little more tact I think," she said lightly and laughed Roy gave a bark of laughter.

"Now whether he chose to use it or not was a completely different matter," Roy grinned and Gracia giggled.

"Very true," she replied happily while Envy looked between the two of them feeling guilt start to bubble up in the pit of his stomach Roy seemed to notice and took his his chin in his hand and made him look up from the table top he'd been staring at.

"Hey, none of that," he demanded and Envy went pink.

"S-sorry!" he squeaked and Roy smiled at him gently then caressed his cheek with a thumb, his face was soft and Envy couldn't help but stare and try to commit the man's face to memory.

"Do you want to move to the sitting room?" Roy asked and Envy didn't know if he nodded his head yes or not, but apparently he had because Roy took his hand again and led him to the sitting room.

They sat on the couch, Roy looking as relaxed as he could while he was still in uniform, Envy sat next to him and was happy to be pulled in to lean against Roy's side, he sighed in contentment and shut his eyes squeezing Roy's hand and snuggling closer. He was so happy to be with him again, to feel the heat radiating off of him, to feel the rough texture of his uniform on his cheek. To be in his arms and to be kissed on the forehead, like the man had just done, Envy opened an eye and looked at the black glittering eyes above him.

"What?" he asked quietly, hoping to keep the mood soft. Roy smiled at him again, his lip quirking in amusement.

"Oh just you, you're so cute like that," he said and Envy went pink and spluttered, he knew Roy was teasing, in a way he was also being truthful, but it was still embarrassing.

"W-well you-you're..." he trailed off with a pout and Roy laughed then kissed his forehead again, brushing aside a lock of hair.

"I love you," he murmured against his forehead and Envy pulled away slightly to look at the man in surprise who looked down at him, saying with his eyes that he meant what he had just said and Envy beamed.

"I love you too," he returned and received a kiss, a chaste sweet one on the lips before he snuggled closer to the dark haired man feeling the happiest he ever had in his life.

After a while of cuddling Envy realized he had to get home before the Alighieri's flipped, he kissed Roy goodbye thanked Gracia for the food then hurried back home, he was greeted by two very angry looking parents.

"And where were you young man?" Dante demanded her arms crossed her eyebrows furrowed and looking for all the world like an upset and worried mother.

"At a friends house, she fed me," Envy replied cryptically, playing the part of a rebellious teenager, which he more or less was.

"Oh and who is this friend exactly?" Salvador asked leaning against the door to the living room, his eyebrow raised and his arms crossed as well. Envy had to stop himself from rolling his eyes.

"A friend, do you need to know every single detail of my life? Should I give you times in which I plan to urinate?" he asked callously and Dante looked surprised before frowning.

"If I find out you were at _that man's_ house you will be in so much trouble young man!" she said and Envy did roll his eyes this time.

"I wasn't at Roy's house," he said truthfully, "I was with my friend Gracia, she's the one who taught me how to cook," he said and Dante blinked then deflated.

"Oh," she said and Salvador raised an amused eyebrow at the black haired teen.

"So this Gracia, is she _just_ a friend?" he asked putting inflection on the word to imply something.

"Yes, I'm not really a 'cougar with a nine year old daughter' type," Envy replied flatly and the man frowned looking a little disappointed, and that seemed to make Dante come back to herself.

"Oh Liz dropped by, how are you two getting along?" she asked and Envy tried not to look pained but he was pretty sure he failed.

"I don't really like her that much, she's really pushy." he muttered and Dante blinked.

"But you two always used to be so close," she said and Envy sighed.

"Yeah well, that's something I find pretty hard to believe, among other things," he said looking at them significantly and Salvador's lips tightened while Dante just looked sad, then Salvador struck out and slapped Envy across the face who blinked in shock at the wall to his right before looking back.

"What was that for?" he asked in wide eyed shock and the man looked at him with a hard face.

"We are trying our best for you son, the least you could do is give us the benefit of the doubt," the man said in a hard to read tone. But Envy shook his head.

"Well that isn't something I can do, you can't be my parents, because I don't have any, I know that, so whatever it is you're trying to do must be bigger than me," he said looking at the two people posing as his parents, they both had slipped unreadable masks on and Envy smirked.

"See, I knew it. Let me guess you're trying to get at Roy through me, well it's not going to work just so you know, You should give up on this charade before it gets ugly," he said and he stared at the two others waiting for one of them to crack. Then Salvador inhaled.

"I will not take this from you, go to your room young man, we are your parents and will not be treated any other way," he said evenly but there was an underlining tone of anger. Envy blinked at him, then shook his head with a sigh and went to his room.

Envy didn't think much more of things, he could hear the two other people in the house talking quietly downstairs but really didn't pay much mind to it, until his door opened.

The two adults stepped in carefully, closing the door after them Envy turned to look at them, sitting on his bed.

"Yes?" he asked hoping it didn't sound as irritated as he felt. Salvador sighed and Dante put her hand on his arm.

"We want to set some ground rules. You can visit your friends, as long as it's not that Mustang," here he sneered, "and you have to be home by nine, ten on weekends, okay?" he asked and Envy blinked.

"Sure," Envy replied a little surprised they smiled at him and Dante came over to Envy and hugged him.

"Maybe you aren't our son, but we still care for you," she said and Envy nodded.

"Okay, I'll tell you if I go out again, thanks," he said a little unsure but Dante smiled at him then hugged him before leaving, Salvador nodded then closed the door after him. That had been weird. Why did he suddenly get the feeling that something was up?


	16. Chapter 16

REVIEWS = FASTER UPDATES that's the simplest equation you'll ever find. Oh...and if I was you I'd update REAL fast with this chap. *evil smirk*

Find Me

Chapter 16: True Colors Oh and smut.

Almost every other day Envy went to go see Gracia and Elicia, and a lot of the time Roy was there too, but he had a lot to do concerning his ambition to be the next Fuhrer, though now it was more of a Neo-Fuhrer. But he made time for Envy every chance he could, and every time before Envy would leave to go back, Roy would kiss him on the cheek and tell him 'I love you,' it made Envy so happy every time he didn't stop smiling until the next day.

It was soon a routine Envy would go over to Gracia's he'd help her make dinner and then Roy would come over and he'd kiss them both on the cheek before sitting at the table and Elicia proceeded to tell them all about her day. It wasn't until maybe two months after Envy had been claimed by his parents that they actually got some time alone together, Elicia went to spend the night at a friends and Gracia had gone on a girls night out leaving Roy and Envy alone.

It started out on the couch a pretty innocent make out session, when Envy shimmied closer to Roy and their crotches touched, they both gasped and Roy's eyes gleamed with lust, it had been a pretty long time since they'd really been together, a moment later they were in the guest bedroom and Roy was over Envy taking off his shirt while the boy was doing the same to Roy's uniform his hands found the pale skin underneath and they started to explore it, and Roy realized it was the first time too. He moaned a little when the boy got to his pants and fumbled with the buckle before pulling it off and shoving the pants down. Roy was quick to do the same to Envy who was panting in anticipation his eye glazed with want.

"Roy..." he whispered and it took most of Roy's self control to not ravish him right then, instead he yanked off the pants and then bent his head down and licked at Envy's clit who moaned through clenched teeth.

"I want to hear you," Roy said and licked it again and Envy opened his mouth to cry out, then he plunged his tongue in and Envy cried out even louder in pleasure his hips bucking. Roy held them down as he continued to lick and tease the opening. Envy started making sounds of frustration, his hand went to Roy's hair and yanked on it gently.

"Roy...please...I want you in me...please," Roy shivered in sheer delight at the words, he took Envy's lips surprising him in the middle of a gasp, dipping his tongue in and thrusting it in and out a few times giving the boy an idea of what was to come. He lined himself up and pushed in a little as Envy's arms wrapped around his back and he mewled into his mouth then bucked his hips up impaling himself a little further, Roy pushed the rest of the way in and Envy threw his head back and panted right before Roy pulled back thrusted back in and hit his g-spot. Envy cried out the loudest yet, his nails racking Roy's back and he was sure there would be marks in the morning.

He pulled back and thrust in again earning another loud cry of pleasure, Roy looked at the boys face as he panted and gasped and writhed in the pleasure he had caused. His eyes were shut tight his mouth open slightly as air rushed in and out usually accompanied by a mewl or cry. His hair was spanned out behind him creating a dark halo, sweat gleamed on his face. It was the most beautiful thing Roy had ever seen.

"Envy," he breathed and kissed the boy again who tried to respond but was too overwhelmed with pleasure, Roy's pace started to pick up and Envy started meeting his thrusts erratically. A beautiful sound coming out of his mouth each time.

"Oh Roy! Roy! Ah! AH!" Envy's headld ha was thrown back as he reached his peak, Roy let him ride it out right as he hit his own, he cried out and thrust a few more times before he pulled out and collapsed next to the boy who turned to him and kissed him lightly on the lips.

"I love you," he said and Roy moved a strand of hair, letting his finger trail down the jaw line and trace his lips.

"I love you too," he replied and Envy smiled at him tiredly then he snuggled closer to him, Roy's arms wrapped around him, as he sighed in contentment. They fell asleep in each other's arms the sheet entwined with their legs. A smiling angel checked in on them later in the evening, happy that they were smiling in their sleep.

Gracia called Envy's parents to let them know he was staying the night because Elicia had worn him out along with the two other nine year olds who had insisted on dressing him up as a knight and making him rescue the princess from an evil tyrant. It was a lie but she had talked to Roy and he'd said they didn't' like him and if they found out Envy was with him he'd get in trouble so she didn't' mind lying for his sake.

Envy awoke to gentle breath fanning over his face, he opened his eyes to see Roy's sleeping face over his own, he smiled happy to see it in such a relaxed state, he brought the arm that had been resting against Roy's chest up to his face and softly traced the lines and contours of it, there were wrinkles, two on his forehead from all that scowling and frowning, same for the ones by the corners of his mouth, and then the ones by the corners of his eyes, the ones that crinkled when he smiled. The pad of his finger gently brushed them all, as well as those thin lips that were open slightly letting air go in it out as needed. Envy smiled up at him then moved up a little to press his lips oh so gently to Roy's, he felt the arm at his waist tighten and the lips kiss back. He pulled back to see Roy blinking at him sleepily.

"Good morning to you too," he whispered and Envy laughed softly, then burrowed further into Roy's arms, inhaling his sent and absorbing his warmth.

"Good morning," he said lazily in return and Roy chuckled softly and started playing with a few strands of Envy's hair looking his face over just as Envy had done to his moments before. Envy smiled up at him and he smiled back down.

"Roy what are you gonna do after you become Fuhrer?" He asked mainly just to hear the man's deep voice. Envy loved to listen to it, the rumble of his chest and deep baritone flavor of it.

"Why do you ask?" the man asked back seeming to be perfectly content with just sitting there in each other's embrace, Envy shrugged.

"Just curious is all, I know that the Alighieri's are trying to distract you from the candidacy with me...but I don't want you to get distracted," he said and Roy kissed his forehead with a smile raise of his head.

"You're not a distraction, and it's fine, I have Falman looking into things while I'm busy doing all of the lovely fun stuff," he said airily and Envy laughed, he meant paperwork. Envy snaked an arm around Roy's waist and pulled himself closer so his face was right up against his chest. He inhaled contentedly and Roy tightened his hold on Envy's own waist.

"I love you," Envy wasn't sure who had said it him or Roy, perhaps they'd said it at the same time, but it made him smile all the same.

"Hey you two time to get up!" the guest room door slammed open, and Gracia came in wearing an apron and had a spatula in hand. She didn't even seem to care they were scrambling to cover themselves up better with the sheet.

"If you're not up in five minutes you don't get any breakfast," she said waving the spatula at them, completely ignoring their wide eyes as she turned around and went back to the kitchen, feeling a little mischievous after that.

"Well," Roy said his cheeks a bright red, Envy nodded, his own face completely crimson. After their embarrassment subsided they dressed and Envy stripped the bed and went to the washing room, put the clothes in and went to the kitchen to see Roy already at the table sipping at coffee, and avoiding looking at Gracia who was smiling at him in an almost smug manner.

"Um thank you Gracia, for calling the Alighieri's," Envy said unsure of the woman at the moment, she blinked and looked at him her face turning pleasant again.

"Oh it was nothing dear!" she said happily and then pushed him into a chair and almost shoved food down his throat.

"Uh-huh..." he said and Gracia just smiled all the more brightly, Envy blinked then started eating the food on his plate. After eating Envy felt he should probably leave so as not to make the fake parents worried.

Roy walked him to the door, and right before Envy stepped out pulled him in for a kiss, when they broke apart Envy was panting and his cheeks were flushed.

"I love you," Roy told him, more like a reminder than a real declaration, and Envy flushed further.

"I know," he said and Roy kissed his forehead, and then Envy walked down the path with a smile.

Envy walked in the door to the Alighieri's and saw Dante putting on her heels, she smiled as he walked the door.

"Oh Honey! How were the nine year olds?" she asked and Envy grinned, Gracia was awesome.

"Terrible, I think I have bruises," he said and Dante laughed then she brushed her finger against his cheek and left for work Envy was home alone most of the day and didn't hear anything until much later. He went downstairs to the living room where he heard several voices conversing lowly.

Envy popped his head in to see Salvador sitting in the recliner while many other men were standing around the room. One of them spotted him and grunted, Salvador looked up and saw him he smiled and Envy felt a chill run down his spine.

"Joshua," he said and he nodded in greeting. "Come here for a moment will you?" he asked and Envy moved into the room a little further.

"Yeah, what do you want?" he asked a little hesitantly.

"I was wondering where you were earlier," he asked and Envy shrugged.

"At Gracia's," he said and the man gave a hum.

"These are some of my coworkers," He said and Envy glanced around at the men, they sure didn't look like it, in fact, they looked...familiar.

"Uh-huh..." Envy said raising an eyebrow he sure didn't get the connection between the two.

"And one of them was on his was home this morning and saw you with someone other than Gracia Hughes," he said giving Envy a piercing look and Envy frowned, then something occurred to him...had he ever told the man Gracia's last name?

"So?" he asked feeling every part the rebellious teen, and a very weary victim.

"So, I don't think I like the idea of my son being with a man." Salvador said glaring and Envy flinched.

"I hardly see how that's any of your business," he snapped back defensively and the man frowned.

"I make it my business, you were seen kissing Mustang," he said and Envy blushed, that wasn't embarrassing at all. He was spluttering for something to say when someone else spoke up.

"Ah! Now I remember!" one of the guys said and Envy along with everyone else looked at the man.

"I thought I'd seen him before, this is that kid from that night we got our asses whipped by flames, you remember?" he asked the others and Envy frowned, what was this guy talking about?

"Wait you mean it's this kid? The one with both?" another guy asked and the first guy nodded.

"I'm positive," he replied and the guy who was standing near Salvador snapped his fingers.

"Of course, that was Roy Mustang that night, so this has to be the kid who'd make us a fortune," and Envy recognized him, along with the others, these were the guys who had almost raped him.

"Wait, this is the one you told me had both..?" Salvador asked and the other man nodded, then he gestured to two of his men and suddenly Envy was getting restrained.

"H-hey! What are you doing let go!" he said struggling, beginning to panic. But they didn't let go and the head guy came over and yanked Envy's pants and briefs down and he was lifted slightly so it was easier to see he yelped and struggled harder.

"Yep, it's him, see there's the vag and dick," the guy pointed, like he was showing his boss a new piece of merchandise, and Envy realized, he was.

"That's intriguing, he'll fetch a pretty cenz, but I don't know if we can use him yet I have to ask my wife if we can go through with things yet," then he looked at his fake son, smirking, and Envy felt terrified, what the hell was going on?

"I don't think I want him being used any more than he already is, so if you please?" he gestured to someone and they came over pulling something out of their pockets and then kneel in front of him.

"What the hell are you doing?" he shrieked when he felt something enter his vagina, something large, he bit his lip to stop himself from crying out in pain it felt like it got bigger the moment it entered and then it stung like something was attaching to him. And then there was something tight being placed around the base of his member, then his pants were pulled up roughly and he bite his lip rather than cry out.

"Those my dear boy will prevent you from straying. And if you tell your little Mustang friend, imagine how he'll feel in future when he knows he lost the candidacy because of you." Salvador said when Envy was set back on the ground trying to stop tears from spilling because of the pain. The man had his chin and was smirking in his face.

"I knew you weren't really my parents," Envy said in a strained voice and the man chuckled then tapped his head.

"Smart boy...well smart thing." he laughed then stood up and looked down, "I suggest you get to bed now." he said and the two men holding him helped him to the door but left him to make it up the stairs by himself. Envy did, albeit very slowly, there was so much pain coming from his groin he could barely make it and fell several times causing more pain.

He made it to his room gasping and straining against the pain, he fell to the floor and cried out when he was jarred. He pulled down his pants with shaking hands and looked down to see a small silver ring around the base of his member. He tried to take it off but it wouldn't budge, then he figured he'd probably have to use alchemy to get it off. Then tentatively used his finger to poke at the plug that was in him, he flinched when it shot pain through his lower regions. He tried to find anything to get a grip on it but it was smooth, he didn't know how he could get it out.

He choked on a sob, this wasn't supposed to happen was it? Was he supposed to tell Roy, but what if he wasn't supposed to be with Roy, maybe Ed was wrong, he wasn't meant to be here and with Roy. Maybe he was supposed to die soon, Roy had forgiven himself now, his job was done wasn't it? He didn't want it to be, he loved it here with Roy and Ed and Winry, the kids and everyone else. He wanted to stay here, but he couldn't tell Roy about this, he still wanted to make the military better, but he couldn't if he was focusing everything on him.

Envy took in a shaky breath and pulled himself up and onto the bed, it didn't hurt as much if he was laying down. He would keep it quiet until Roy got him out of here, then he would use it as retribution then for persecution. He would act normal and then that man would fall and Roy would be at the top.


	17. Chapter 17

Consider this MY revenge dear sweet Becky. *smile*

Find Me

Chapter 17: Revenge

"Envy! What are you doing here?" Riza stood from her desk and moved to greet their visitor, she smiled at him as she hugged him and he grinned back.

"I snuck out," he grinned mischievously, and the men all laughed, the door opened to Roy's office and he came out with a flurry of papers.

"Captain, where are those papers for the committee meeting, I thought you put them on my desk I can't find them!" he said, his hair was ruffled and his eyes were a little wild then he spotted Envy who was looking at him faintly amused.

"Envy!" He smiled brilliantly at him then frowned, "What are you doing here?" he asked looking confused and Envy laughed.

"Don't sound so disappointed to see me, sheesh," he grinned and Roy had the decency to blush and spluttered.

"That isn't what I meant and you know it," he said and Envy just grinned bigger, Roy blinked and Envy turned to Riza.

"I think he needs to be punished," Envy said and almost every face went red, Roy's went purple, Envy merely smiled innocently.

"E-Envy..." Roy whispered in utter embarrassment but all Envy did was walk over to him and take his hand.

"No disturbances please!" Envy said happily and Riza found her voice again.

"Ten minutes," she said Envy turned around and pouted, bottom lip stuck out and eyes pleading.

"Miss Riza!" he whined and they held eye contact for a moment before Riza's eye brow twitched.

"Twenty, but I expect it to be spotless in there." she said fiercely and Envy beamed at her then yanked Roy into the room.

"Don't worry Riza we never leave evidence," he said smiled then slammed the door closed after his long pony tail cleared the frame.

All of the personnel in the office stared at the door for a full five minutes before turning back to their work to try and distract themselves trying their hardest to not strain their ears to see if they could hear anything. It was one of the most awkward situations they'd ever been in.

"Envy! That was terrible!" Roy said and Envy just laughed as he led Roy back to his chair, he smiled at the man.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry, I just felt the need to get a little revenge," he said happily and Roy blinked, while Envy sat on the edge of his desk grinning.

"Revenge for what?" he asked and Envy smiled and shrugged.

"That one time, you know...on your desk and then seconds later I had a five year old in my arms. And then for the fact that I still can't cuddle with you at night," Envy started poking Roy in the chest. "If you don't get to the top soon I'm going to do it for you, I get lonely at night dammit," he scolded and Roy started to laugh then pulled the teen into his arms.

"I miss you at night too, and every time in between," he said softly and Envy smiled and wrapped his arms around the man's neck and sighed happily. It was almost nice enough to make him forget about the constant throb in his groin.

"How have you been?" Roy asked and Envy shrugged ambiguously it had been about two weeks since they'd seen each other Roy had become swamped with work and hadn't been able to make it to Gracia's since that day.

"Fine I guess, bored mostly," Envy replied making sure to keep his head on Roy's shoulder so the man couldn't see his eyes and know he was lying.

"Oh, sorry I haven't been around much," Roy said putting his chin on top of Envy's head, who smiled a little ruefully.

"It's okay I know you're busy trying to rule the world and all. King Mustang," he teased and Roy laughed then tipped Envy's head up with a hand and kissed his forehead.

"Yep, does that mean you're my Queen?" he teased right back and Envy hit his chest with the palm of his hand and huffed.

"Jerk, yeah I guess it does," he said with a smirk and Roy paused for a moment before he started laughing he hugged the teen close who yelped out of surprise and a little pain before he started laughing too. Then before they knew it they were caught in a kissing war, their tongues battling it out. Envy straddled the older man his arms around his neck, while Roy's hands moved down from his waist to his pants. Envy broke away panting.

"N-no, wait...I want to...try something..." he panted and Roy raised an eyebrow as Envy slid to the floor. His hands went to Roy's belt and Roy figured out what he was doing, and grabbed his hands.

"You don't have to," he said and Envy shook his head with a petulant pout.

"I want to, you've done...well things to me with your mouth...I want to try..." he said and Roy certainly couldn't deny him if he was looking at him like he'd cry if he'd say no.

Envy gently took Roy's member out of his pants and the man gave a small grunt from the contact. And Roy watched as Envy bit his lips, unsure of what to do next. Then he gently took it in his hand and then leaned forward and licked the tip tentatively. Roy let a small gasp escape his lips, but at the sound it made Envy smile, and Roy figured he was probably gauging what he was doing by the sounds Roy was making.

He licked again and Roy let out a small moan, then Envy opened his mouth and wrapped his lips around the head of the member and Roy slapped a hand over his mouth to cover the cry. Envy took that as a sign that he wasn't failing at this so far, he let his tongue prob the head of the member and tightened the grip his hand had, he knew he couldn't put it all in his mouth so he had to compensate. Roy moaned behind his hand and then Envy started pumping slowly as his tongue played with the tip of Roy's member.

"Mm!" Roy moaned, Envy glanced up to see the man had his eyes squeezed shut and his knuckles were white as he tried to not be too loud.

He gave a small suck, and the hand that was on the chair gripped it painfully, He took more of the member in his mouth and sucked harder while his fist sped up. Roy started panting, his chest was heaving and his his breath was coming out in whooshes. Well it much have been a long time since he'd gotten a blow job. Which was fairly comforting for his lover.

"Envy," the man breathed and the boy crouching in front of him looked up as he sucked harder, his eyes blazing and Roy came.

He cried out, covering his mouth with a shaky hand. Those had been the most intense eyes Envy had ever had, and it had been so beautiful and alluring, but almost frightening in a way. Envy shut his eyes as he caught the hot liquid in his mouth and swallowed. He released the now flaccid member, put it back in the pants zipped them up and then plopped on his butt.

"Ew..." he said and Roy smiled at him in sorry then put his hand out, Envy took it and was pulled to Roy's lap and brought to his chest.

"You didn't have to do that you know," he mumbled in his hair and Envy sighed then loosely wrapped his arms around his older lover.

"I know, but I wanted to." he replied and Roy hugged him, he smiled, and rested his head on Roy's shoulder.

"Roy?" he asked after a moment of comfortable silence, the man hummed in acknowledgement of the question.

"You're going to be Fuhrer no matter what? Right?" he asked and Roy pushed him back a little a bemused smile on his face.

"What brought that on?" he asked and Envy shrugged then pulled himself closer to the man, holding onto his uniform with loose fingers.

"Nothing I just want to make sure. You're not going to let anything get in your way right?" he asked and he felt the man nod.

"Yes, I want to make the world a better place, and I have to get as close to the top as I can in order to do that," he said and Envy smiled then nodded into Roy's shoulder.

"Good, I'm glad," he said Roy hugged him and they stayed like that for a few moments longer before they heard what sounded suspiciously like the click of the safety of a pistol being turned off on the other side of the door.

They both rushed to make sure everything looked clean, it did so they were fine and when the door opened Envy was sitting on the couch with his hands in his lap while Roy had a pen to a piece of paper, Riza nodded then exited the room. Roy and Envy looked at each other and then they both clasped hands to their mouths to stifle their laughter. It was a good day.

Envy walked away from headquarters, smiling and he would have a bounce in his step if it didn't hurt, he felt very proud of himself, Roy hadn't noticed! He grinned to himself and walked towards the house. It wasn't as easy living with them now, Dante had apparently been told and would usually look at him like she was trying to see him, see if he really did have both, while Salvador just smiled at him in a predatory fashion.

It was very uncomfortable to be in that house so Envy spent most of his time out of it, now that they didn't have to play parent the two adults didn't care, though Elizabeth still tried to get in his pants even after he told her he knew it was a trick. She said he was the hottest boy she'd ever laid eyes on and then Envy told her he had a vagina, she backed off then.

Envy smiled at the thought, the look on her face had been priceless and she had run out of there like the world was on fire, it had been a good day, but he really didn't have much to look forward to today. He stopped walking and frowned, he didn't have to go home...nope, he could go visit Gracia! He grinned then turned around and started walking in the direction of the kind woman's house.

He took two steps when all of a sudden someone came up behind him and put a cloth over his mouth and nose, he gasped in surprise and inhaled an odd smell. And then he felt himself go weak and get caught by the person holding the rag as he went limp. Well there went his good day.


	18. Chapter 18

Here you go, since well there were more reviews than I thought. Okay have fun.

Find Me

Chapter 18: He Knew

Roy ran a hand through his hair, paperwork was going to be the end of him, the sheer volume of the stack Riza had brought had made tears come to his eyes, the visit from Envy had been nice, very nice to say the least, he really hadn't expected that but he was glad it had happened. And Envy had kissed him goodbye fairly passionately and Roy was sad to not think he wasn't going to go home and have the boy waiting for him, but it was okay, once Falman figured things out Envy would be his again. He knew his man could do it, he hadn't come this far without putting any faith in his men after all.

He nodded, he had good, understanding, fine men who needlessly teased him about being a cradle-robber. He snorted, the moment Envy left and he stuck his head out the door to tell Hawkeye he was done with the reports for the General at East HQ, they all smirked and started calling him names. He had frozen on the spot and then smiled at all of his male subordinates, then closed his door, he sure hoped they had all been terrified by that reaction because his initial response had been to clap his hands and then using Havoc's lit, though it wasn't supposed to be, cigarette and burn every one of their eyebrows off. But he hadn't. They should consider themselves lucky because his revenge was going to be worse. He chuckled, oooh yes it was.

While Roy was chuckling madly to himself he barely noticed as the door opened and Hawkeye came in.

"Sir," she said and he snapped out of it to look at her.

"Uh...yes?" he said blinking and Riza sighed.

"Sir, there seems to be a problem," she said and Roy noticed for the first time the tight grip she had on the papers in her hand and the narrowing of her eyes in what could be worry. Roy straightened a bit and looked at her more seriously.

"What is it?" he asked and Riza bit her lip before she handed him the papers and started speaking.

"Ten minutes ago someone called in a report of kidnapping, the person in the description matches that of-" she started but Roy stood, he had already read the report.

"Riza I want a unit on the search for him, and I need a-" he started but Riza interrupted him saluting as she did so.

"Sir with all due respect, you have a meeting in ten minutes with the other three candidates," she said and Roy froze, "You need to be worrying about that right now, let us find him sir," she said and Roy ground his teeth together, glaring at his first in command. Then a voice echoed in his head.

"_Roy? You're going to be Fuhrer no matter what? Right?_" Envy's voice echoed in his head and he sighed before nodding at the woman and then a thought struck him, why would Envy say something like that?

"He knew," Roy breathed, the hand that was halfway through his hair freezing, Riza cocked her head in confusion.

"Sir?" she asked and Roy turned to her his eyes wide as he looked at her but didn't really see her.

"He knew, he knew he was going to get kidnapped, and he didn't tell me because he wanted me to focus on...Dammit!" Roy cursed and Riza's eyebrows shot up, Roy never swore. He clenched his fists, then stormed out to Falman.

"Falman, look into Hakuro's records see if he's had any dealings with these 'Alighieri's' before," Roy demanded and the man stared for a second before hoping to it, he shuffled through the papers before he pulled something out and Roy snatched it. He scanned it quickly and his eyes spotted what he wanted.

"Art dealers huh? I'm pretty sure Envy never mentioned having any art in their house, and he would have, I know it, he loves paintings ever since he read that book about the greatest works of the centuries. So they're dealers of some kind, which is why they needed permission to do some trading with Drachma?" Roy smirked, well this was great, now if only it wasn't so cryptic. "Falman look into this and have a report on my desk by the time I'm back, Havoc I need you to finish authorizing the paperwork on the right side of my desk, Fuery keep an ear out for any 'Ransom' calls, Breda see if you can find out where they are if any calls are made in relation to where he was seen being taken," Roy demanded and each and every one of his officers saluted and then dove into their work. He smiled, they were the best men an officer could ask for.

Roy sat in on the meeting only speaking when he was spoken to directly by Fuhrer Grumman, who noticed something was up but didn't say anything. Hakuro was also glancing at him from time to time but Roy refused to make eye contact, he didn't want the man to think he was losing it. Which he wasn't he was thinking of what he was going to do to the man once he had evidence that he was the one who had led to Envy being forced to living with the Alighieri's.

Envy was being strong, and so he could be strong too, he would be Fuhrer even if it meant having to look weak in front of Hakuro.

"Mustang, what do you think the parliament will say to the one year service limit?" Hakuro asked. And Roy turned his eyes hiding the anger he felt as finally made eye contact, his lips quirked in a smirk.

"Well surely, I don't know, I'm not a politician, but I would believe they wouldn't understand our reasons behind it. If we can get them to understand that if we can lessen the amount of soldiers being granted discharge, if we put a limit on service, if we weed out the weaker applicants frrom the start the overall work ethic of the men should increase," He said and Hakuro hid a huff, he had obviously been hoping to catch Roy with his mind somewhere else, but Roy was far too used to zoning out during meetings that that was a pipe dream for the General. He was quite satisfied when the man scowled at him.

"Good," Grumman said, then he grinned, "Well I think that's enough for today," he said and then everyone stood and saluted, he returned the salute and then dismissed everyone.

The Fuhrer caught Roy as he was leaving, and started walking along with him.

"You seem distracted Mustang, what's on your mind?" he asked and Roy sighed, knowing Riza was following them at a distance.

"Nothing of importance, sir," he replied then caught the older man's eye, his eye brow was raised, showing how he clearly wasn't satisfied with the answer. Roy sighed.

"A friend of mine has gone missing, and I believe General Hakuro is responsible." he said, seeing as there was no point in stalling.

"You have evidence of this?" the Fuhrer asked, and Roy sighed.

"Not yet, sir. I have men working on it," he said and the elder man nodded then put his arms behind his back.

"I hope you know what you're doing Mustang, I'd hate to see Hakuro in office because you got distracted." he said then grinned, Roy grinned back then saluted the man nodded then turned and walked away.

Riza hurried her steps to walk level with him.

"Anything yet?" he asked and Riza nodded and handed him a file, he opened it and glanced down.

It turned out that the two of them weren't even married, Dante Alighieri and Salvador Dali. They both were very well known dealers in the black market, however it was not mentioned what it was they sold. Roy frowned that was covered up deeply, that meant it was probably very bad, he sure as hell hoped Envy was okay, while Roy sent people out to look in the areas he was when he was taken he would hope for his safe return.

Roy made certain to get the two bosses under watch, as he marched back into his office, he was satisfied to see the decrease of paperwork on his desk, he grabbed a pen and started going through the rest of it like a madman, Riza was faintly thinking that after they found him, because she knew they would, he should get 'kidnapped' again just so Roy would finish his paperwork on time for once.

"Hawkeye! Get me a car, we are going to visit the 'Alighieri's'," Roy said his smirk growing feral, Riza swallowed, she had never seen that look on his face, it was pretty terrifying. She saluted and rushed to follow the order.

Roy was in a car on the way to the house in seconds, Riza was driving at a much faster pace than normal, but Roy was grateful that the house came into sight so soon. She parked the car and they stepped out, Roy was up to the door in moments Riza right beside him as he knocked. The door opened and Salvador's face changed from surprise to a frown and Roy smiled.

"Would you mind if we came in?" he asked and his tone of voice broached no argument, his black eyes glaring at the man, he was going to get his lover back and become Fuhrer, no matter what.


	19. Chapter 19

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Chapter 19: Kidnapped

Envy groaned as his eyes flickered, it smelled really bad down here, even worse than that cloth that had been placed over his mouth. There was a bad taste in his mouth because of it too, he opened his eyes and closed them again, did that light have to be so bright?

"Ah it appears that our guest is finally awake, how do you feel?" Envy opened an eye to see someone standing in front of the light source. He was pretty sure they were up, but he was feeling disoriented and couldn't be sure if they weren't to the side.

He opened his mouth to tell the person to go shove something very painful up their butt but instead just coughed, the nasty taste in his mouth had made it go dry. The person hummed and turned to talk to someone else then moments later he was grabbed under the arms which were tied behind his back and lifted into a sitting position. He flinched as it jarred the things on and in his genitalia, then a glass was pressed to his lips and he didn't take any at first but they grabbed his chin and poured some down his throat, it tasted like water so Envy started drinking it on his own. They pulled back and he took in a lungful of air, it smelled really musty down here, if it was down, it sure felt down. It felt very odd in fact, this place made shivers Tapdance all over his spine.

"There now, that's better, yes?" the first voice spoke again, and Envy looked up to see a woman probably in her late twenties, not very attractive but not ugly, fairly bland with brown hair and eyes looking at him, smiling kindly. Envy frowned, then looked behind her, there were two other people one looked to be a boy about his age maybe younger. The other was an older man, in his fifties at least, and they were both carrying a gun each.

Envy frowned, he was sure the people who were going to do something to him were Salvador's men, but he didn't think these people worked for Salvador, something was wrong with this.

"So, you're saying that you were going to have him kidnapped but it wasn't scheduled until tomorrow?" Roy asked his voice not betraying his growing worry or anger. He was staring at the couple on the couch while Riza stood behind him.

"Yes, more or less, but it's kind of pointless now, got you distracted though didn't we?" Dante smiled and Roy gave her a bland look.

"Don't get your hopes up, Hakuro is never going to be Fuhrer." he said and the two on the couch frowned, Dante huffed and crossed her arms.

"Well what are you going to do? We were your only lead weren't we?" Salvador asked with a smirk and Roy smirked right back.

"No, just the most obvious one," he replied, not giving away any sign of a bluff. "Anyhow, I suggest you not leave anytime soon, I do have evidence that could put you away for years," Roy stood from the chair he was sitting in and turned towards the door. "We'll be keeping in touch," he said and then he went to the door, Hawkeye right behind him. He would go back to the office and hopefully there would be more leads.

Envy was stumbling along, being jabbed with a gun every time he stumbled and he glared at the boy who smiled back.

He hadn't said anything to them, he wasn't sure what they were after all he knew was that he really didn't want to be down here any longer than necessary.

He felt like this place was very familiar, but he couldn't remember from where, it was just a bunch of hallways, really old smelly hallways.

"I'm sure you recognize this place, I was told this is where you resided most of the time," the woman said and Envy just stared at her, she smiled.

"There is no need to be wary, it's fine just as long as you do as you're told no harm will come to you." she said and Envy stared at her more blandly, raising an eyebrow. She simply smiled back as they came to a large room that looked destroyed, and fixed with Alchemy. Envy frowned, it did feel familiar. But Why?

The woman smiled as she watched Envy look around.

"You'll be wondering where we are I'm sure, we're under Central Headquarters, where Father was until the Promised Day." she said and Envy's eyes widened, why was this sounding so familiar?

"And you will be my link to the gate so I may become a God," the woman said then Envy snorted.

"You're joking right?" he said and the woman blinked at him, turning at him with a smile.

"Not at all, I will become a god and everything will fall to my will!" she laughed a little crazily and Envy tried to back away but felt a gun barrel in the small of his back.

"It was my brother who originally had this plan you know, he thought if he summoned a 'homunculus' from the gate then he would gain immortality unfortunately in doing so he disappeared, but I know you are just keys to God-dom, it was our father who told us of you, he was a General you know, one of the ones who would have reached God-dom had the Fullmetal and Flame Alchemists not interfered." she said and Envy sighed. Yep she was crazy.

"Yeah well sorry, but I'm not a homunculus so, oopsie-daisy too bad, you can let me go now," he said but the woman shook her head.

"Not now, but you will be again, when you have your life source back," she said and then walked over to one of the vein like tubes and cut it open, what spilled out was red goo and several red stones. Envy's eyes widened, hadn't Ed said something about Philosopher's Stones? Envy backed away further not even caring that the gun barrel was pressing in to his back with bruising force. But then he fell to the ground as it suddenly moved and then the two males had a foot on his torso, one had one on a shoulder while the other was on his abdomen, pinning hims down but he was too busy gasping in pain to really care.

And then the woman came over to him several small stones in hand she was standing above him and he snapped his mouth closed. He had an inkling suspicion of what she was going to do with those. She knelt down and frowned.

"Come now, I'm sure you want this too, why else would you have come back?" she asked and Envy shook his head, and the woman frowned then nodded to the older man who had his foot on Envy's abdomen. He pressed down firmly and Envy squeezed his eyes and mouth closed, it hurt, but not enough to make him gasp. She frowned then the man pressed harder, but Envy just clenched his teeth harder and then the pressure released, but reappeared lower, on his groin. He cried out in pain as it flashed through him and then a hand clamped over his mouth, stones dropping in. Envy started struggling, they fell to the back of his throat and he desperately tried not to swallow but it was so hard, he started choking on them, but the hand wouldn't move. He started thrashing harder but there was still a foot on his groin and he cried out as the pain increased and he choked one of them down, tears started to stream down his face. He didn't want to swallow people's souls! But soon he couldn't breath, and his body was reacting the only way it could and it was trying to get rid of the stones via gag reflex, only there was something obstructing the path. He swallowed by instinct and the rest went down his throat, he thrashed harder, if he could get free he could make himself puke them back up, but they were holding on tighter.

And then he felt something in the center of his chest, it felt like something had pulsed, and then it happened again, he froze and then it felt like he was being filled with warmth from head to toe and it was starting to gather very quickly all around his body. And then the power exploded.

Roy scrubbed his face with his hands and then let his head fall to his desk. Nothing. So far they hadn't heard anything, and Roy was getting very worried, so were the others, they didn't like seeing him like this and they certainly didn't like knowing Envy was missing.

Roy would just have to keep looking, yes, that was all, he had to still be in the city he'd only been gone for four hours, he couldn't be far.

And suddenly the building gave a violent lurch, and Roy fell out of his chair, he stood up and then went to his office door.

"What the hell was that?" he asked and all of his subordinates were either on the floor or standing back up from falling to the floor.

"We don't know Sir," Fuery said at the communication consul, and Roy frowned this was incredibly odd.

"If Fullmetal were here we could have just blamed it on him," Roy said in bitter amusement only to have the door slam open.

"And what the crap do you mean by that huh?" Ed said from the doorway, a toddler on his hip and a five year old attached to his hand.

"Ed, what are you doing here?" Riza asked as Roy just gaped, at a loss for words and instead just looked like a fish out of water.

"Well we were thinking of surprising Envy for his Birthday, cause it's tomorrow you know, and then it appears all hell has broken loose," Ed said as he walked into the room, he deposited Trisha to Fuery who smiled at the little girl and then gave Nicholas to Havoc who immediately removed the unlit cigarette from his mouth so the kid wouldn't grab it and wouldn't get a reprimand from the father.

"Oh crap," Roy said and Ed gave him a look, Roy flushed, he'd totally forgotten tomorrow was Envy's appointed day of birth.

"You forgot didn't you?" Ed asked crossing his arms, only his twinkling eyes showing how amused he was.

"W-well it's not like it matters! We have to find him first!" Roy spluttered and Ed would have laughed if the content hadn't caught up with him.

"You _lost_ him? How on earth could you-" and then Ed stopped and almost everyone could hear the clicks in his head. And then Ed stared at Roy.

"He goes missing and then there's an explosion underneath Central HQ, I think there's a connection." he said and Roy frowned.

"Are you saying he blew something up?" He asked skeptically and Ed rolled his eyes and started doubting whether the man wasn't senile.

"No, but it's just likely he is, Roy, he used to be a homunculus and that was their main point of operations, come on." he said and Roy shrugged, that was fair enough.

"So, what are we waiting for shouldn't we go get him?" Ed asked sounding like he used to, his old impatient self and Roy frowned then grabbed Nicholas from Jean who was amusing the child with funny faces, then handed him back to his father.

"My team and I will be getting him, Edward, you, as a civilian, will wait here with Sergeant Fuery," he said and Ed deflated a bit, he must have forgotten he'd had kids and quit the military.

"Fine, just hurry up," he mumbled and pouted at Nicholas who giggled and patted his father's face.

"Yes, yes, don't have a conniption, you might shrink," Roy said and then gestured to the rest of his officers and left the room leaving a spluttering Ed behind.

The moment the burst of an alchemic reaction had stopped, Envy stopped writhing on the floor, his voice was horse from screaming, he panted for a moment before it all stopped.

The woman came over and crouched next to him, she laid a hand on his cheek and smiled down at him.

"There that wasn't too bad was it? Now, you are mine, you are my tool to rule the world!" she threw her head back and laughed but it was cut off with a gasp when a hand gripped her wrist painfully.

"I am no one's tool, you pathetic human scum, I am Envy!" the woman screamed as her wrist was snapped.

She screamed again as the two men ran in terror, the last thing the woman saw before she died were two furious blood red eyes.


	20. Chapter 20

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Chapter 20: Monsters Reawakening

Roy led his team through the tunnels to where he thought he remembered the main chamber was, truth of the matter was, Roy really had no clue, considering he'd been blind and transported into the place in the first place.

Roy was debating between going left or straight, when two sets of frantic heels clodded on the stone ground and intersected with them, they were grabbed by Havoc and Falman. They had wide scared eyes and a panicked look about them.

"What are you two doing down here?" Roy demanded, and they looked at him the older one was the first to speak.

"You've got to get us out! There's a monster! It'll kill us!" he said and Roy frowned.

"Where is this monster?" he asked and the man pointed down the hall they'd just ran down he nodded at Falman and Havoc. They pushed the two males forward against much protest, but they managed to make their way back to the main chamber.

Roy looked around, he'd never actually seen it before, it was pretty badly wrecked, Fullmetal sure knew how to decorate. Then Roy spotted a black figure laying on the ground, in a pool of blood.

His heart stopped and he rushed over to the figure, it was Envy alright, he was laying on his side one arm straight out the other next to his chest covered in blood. His bloodied hair was covering most of his face, Roy gently turned him over, and brushed his hair from his face and gasped.

"What the...?" he breathed and Riza came over, she too saw the three circles on his forehead connected by red lines, forming an upside down triangle.

"Roy, what does it mean?" she asked and Roy shook his head, then slowly moved his arms under the prone boy, lifting him up.

"I don't know," he said and then walked back up to the surface with the intention of admitting him to the hospital.

The hospital trip was longer than Roy expected, he was happy to hear that none of the blood belonged to Envy, but he was worried as to where it had come from. And then the doctor had told Roy about the things that Envy had not, the things that were on and in Envy's genitalia. According to the doctor it had caused some tears, because of how long they'd been there, but he would be fine. Luckily it was Dr. Shepperd who checked him out and made no comment about the extra marks on his body. Though Roy did ask if there was one on his thigh the doctor said no, Roy let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

Then Roy took him back to the office, mainly because he'd forgotten to tell Ed, and because he still needed to work and he wanted the teen close by when he woke up, he was laid on the couch and Roy went out to talk to Ed closing the door behind himself.

Envy came to with an unattractive grunt, he rubbed his forehead, it hurt a lot and so did his back and chest, it hurt practically every where. Dammit, he hated pain, he growled for the sake of letting his temper rear it's ugly head, and he opened his eyes, grateful it was dark where ever he was.

He sat up and held his head, dammit, why did it hurt so much, and where was he? He looked around, it looked familiar, why was it...? Oh it was Roy's office. Roy. Roy Mustang. The man he loved.

He scrunched his face, Love? Is that what that feeling was, that burning sensation, that big swell in his chest? Yes it must be, he loved Roy with all of his being, but why? That man had _decimated_ him.

He rubbed his head again, it was throbbing now, aching badly. Something had to be seriously wrong with him, he couldn't _love_ Mustang, that was just ridiculous. He took a deep breath and tried to clear it of thought, and while doing so heard voices from out side of the door. He stood and moved closer to it and heard people talking about him.

"...still should have said something, now we don't know where the fault lies," Envy recognized that baritone immediately and a small smile came to his lips before it turned into a scowl. That idiot.

"The two we have in custody said it was a woman, but there were no remains at the site," another voice, a female's. Riza.

"You said he was covered in blood Roy, and well...it is possible..." this voice also familiar, male...Fullmetal. Ed. "Envy was a psycho killer at one point..." the blond said and Envy wanted to smirk, but the urge left him quickly.

"No, I don't want to think that..." Roy said and sighed, "But you're right it is possible, there is evidence it was him. I'll just deal with it. Perhaps when he wakes up he can tell us what happened, whatever the problem was." he said and then Envy opened the door to see Roy standing right next to it, everyone turned and stared in shock as Envy glared at the man.

"The problem was Roy Mustang, that there were Philosopher's Stones within easy access of any foolish alchemist that wished to see where the almost god's domain had been, you fucking dumbass." he snarled then marched over to Roy and poked him in the chest, "You know just as well as I do that the most curious people alive are alchemists, you really think that a few walls and laws will stop them from going down there?"

"Well what did you want me to do?" Roy asked a little shell shocked, his lover was no longer demure, but didn't seem bent on killing him which was a good thing, but he also had the most terrifying red eyes it made him want to look away, but he didn't. The red eyes rolled.

"I don't know, I'm not the alchemist! You could have destroyed them, Marcoh knows how!" he recalled that memory and grit his teeth as the pain attached to the memory assaulted him. "Hell you could use them as a way to get to be Fuhrer, if you have a cure for every ailment known to mankind you'd be a world hero! Bah!" he threw his hands up, then sighed and put a hand over his face.

"Why did I have to fall in love with an idiot?" he muttered, and only Roy caught it, a huge smile broke him from his weariness, Envy must have spotted the arms rising around him because he looked back up at him with a feral glare.

"I'm still mad at you dumbass, so don't _even _think about it." he said bluntly, and Roy blinked before giving a bark of laughter and waved his hand in slight embarrassment.

"Okay, okay, so I was dumb. But what about you, you were keeping things from me," Roy said pointing a finger at the boy who blinked.

"I'm sure there are a lot of things you don't know, dumbass, what was I keeping from you?" he said, the insults just so comfortable on his tongue, though he got poked in the butt by guilt for saying them. Roy rolled his eyes at the insult before crossing his arms.

"That there were a few added things to your anatomy," Roy said outright, an he watched as the young face looked on in confusion and then understanding and finally humiliation and shame.

"I...uh...that's...that's not really relevant to the conversation," he mumbled his face going pink, and Roy sighed that was true, but he still wanted to know why.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked and Envy's red eyes flickered at him before looking down and frowning.

"Because you didn't need to know." he said and Roy frowned and was about to say something else when Envy's attention was directed elsewhere.

"Kitty I want to play," Nicholas tugged on Envy's hand, and Envy stared down at him for a moment before shaking his head.

"No, not right now Nicholas." he said a little strained and the little boy frowned, the older boy had never denied him before.

"Kitty..." he started but Envy shook his head and glanced up at Ed who was watching him looking a bit confused, then he saw Envy raise his eyebrows and he nodded then came over and grabbed Nicholas' hand.

"Come on kiddo, Envy isn't feeling very good today okay?" he said and made to take the boy away but the child in his arm reached forward and attached herself to the teen, Ed sighed.

"Trisha you're not a koala come on," Ed said but the little girl had inherited his stubbornness and wouldn't let go, Envy groaned then gave up the struggle and took the little girl into his arms. She snuggled against his chest and gave a small sigh of contentment.

Envy looked down at her with a look on his face that said something along the lines of 'What, does me being partially insane make me more cuddly?' Ed shook his head and Nicholas pouted.

"Kitty!" he said and Envy rolled his eyes then went down to his eye level, looking at the little boy with his bottom lip pulled out.

"What?" he asked and Nicholas crossed his arms in an image so reminiscent of his father Envy had to stifle a laugh, as did many of the others in the office.

"I want to play," he said in a demanding voice and Envy's eyebrows went up as he tried not to smile.

"And I want to play too, but I'm busy right now, can't you wait till tomorrow at least?" he said and Nicholas pouted more.

"Nu-uh, tomorrow is Kitty's birthday! We're gonna do what he wants!" he said and Envy blinked, was tomorrow really his birthday? Wow.

"Nicholas, I have to do something right now, but I will want to play tomorrow okay?" he asked and Nicholas looked him in the eye and then nodded before he frowned.

"Kitty your eyes are all red," he said and Envy blinked, red like he'd been crying? He didn't recall crying recently, but then again, he was having trouble remembering yesterday, that's why it was taking him so long to remember people, and especially his changed relation to them. Roy was probably the hardest to totally grasp, he loved Roy, but he hated him, so much. He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment before opening them and looking at Ed.

"My eyes are red?" he asked, and Ed nodded a little wearily, and Envy hoped it was because of the kids, because he didn't trust himself with them. Then Riza came over and showed him a compact mirror he looked in and saw his eyes were indeed red instead of the deep black they'd usually been he also had the marks on his forehead, he brushed a finger against them with a frown.

"Why?" he asked and no one had an answer, he sighed and the little girl in his arms looked up at him.

"Pretty Kitty," she said and Envy smiled at her giving her a small squeeze, Ed smiled, a little relieved, his daughter sure was something else.

"Okay...so now that you know you're going to get all of the Philosopher's Stones and use them for good, what do we do with the ones in me?" Envy asked and he expected more of a reaction other than a few cringes.

"Well we could always use them I guess," Ed said rubbing the back of his head in thought, Envy made a face at the suggestion.

"I really wouldn't have cared about that you know...if I wasn't human now," he said and Ed nodded then his eyes lite with a memory.

"So Envy you still jealous of us? What do you think of being a human?" he grinned and Envy gave him a flat look, totally unamused.

"It sucks," he said bluntly and Ed chuckled before shaking his head. Then Roy sighed and crossed his arms.

"At the moment that's really not the biggest problem, we need to find out who it was, well whether or not they're still alive," he gave Envy a look who spotted it from the corner of his eye and he froze.

"Uuuh...I really can't remember," he said and Roy sighed again, that was a lot of help, "Sorry," he said and even though he was sorry, he didn't sound like it. He frowned at himself and groaned, his head hurt so much right now. He was trying to be two different people but not being them at the same time, he couldn't remember which one he was.

There was only one real thing set in stone, and that was: He loved Roy Mustang. That was true, but he was also terrified of the man, and he was angry at him and didn't want to look at him, but he wanted to take him all in, he wanted to actually look at the hands that had cause him all of that pain, but had also caused him the most pleasure he'd ever experienced. He loved Roy, but he also wanted him dead, or his hands chopped off, but also not. He also didn't know whether he should keep the little girl in his arms, he wasn't good with children but he was, they were annoying but so sweet too.

Envy put a hand to his face and made a small sound of discomfort while the others talked of what they were going to do, the general drift was Hakuro was going down for both accounts and then they'd worry about getting Envy back to normal.

"Kitty?" Trisha asked worriedly and the adults turned to see Envy, still crouching on the floor with Trisha and Nicholas, only shaking badly and clutching his head with his free hand.

"Envy?" Roy was next to him in a second a hand on his shoulder, "Are you okay?" he asked gently and the boy shook his head.

"No," he said and Ed came over and took Trisha from his arms while looking worried, "My head hurts." Envy said trying not to sound too whinny but, he never had liked pain.

"You should lay down," Ed said and Roy helped him up, then led him back into the office and to the couch, he was gently pushed to sit on it.

"It feels like I'm trying to be two people at once," Envy murmured and was pulled against a chest, he relaxed immediately knowing it was Roy.

"It doesn't matter who you end up being, I still love you," the man said in his hair, and Envy's face scrunched up.

"Even if I'm the one who murdered your best friend?" he asked and Roy drew back, hands on his shoulders.

"Even then," he said and Envy looked surprised, Roy leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead.

"Get some rest," he said and Envy nodded, and watched as the man exited the room and closed the door behind him, Envy sighed then flopped on the couch willing the headache away. He hoped everything would work out.


	21. Chapter 21

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Chapter 21: Surprises

Envy hadn't realized he'd fallen asleep until he was awoken by a pair of lips over his own, he mumbled a bit and the lips parted to let out a laugh. He opened his eyes to see Roy smiling down at him, and he felt a hand brushing his face. He mumbled again not really feeling up to talking and just waved at the man to go away he was still tired.

"It'd be more comfortable at home you know, in bed," Roy said continuing to brush Envy's face, he huffed, then threw his arms unexpectedly around Roy's neck.

"Fine, but you have to carry me," he said and Roy started laughing out of surprise, it was not like Envy but also like him, he shook his head and kissed his forehead.

"I don't think I can," he said and Envy looked up at him, his red eyes hard to read.

"Try," he said and Roy rolled his eyes and stood up bringing the boy up with him, but not lifting him in his arms.

"Well I would, but that'd give me a perfectly good reason to call you Princess," he said and Envy yelped when he was poked in the side.

"Princess! Tch at least I'm not a human torch!" he said and Roy laughed then pulled him in for a kiss, that turned very heated very fast, but Roy broke away before there was any disrobing.

"Come on, it's time to go, the others want to make sure you're okay too," he said a bit breathily and Envy nodded with a pout, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and took Roy's hand who led him out to the office where Riza, Jean and Ed with the kids were waiting.

"How do you feel?" Ed asked and Envy just shrugged tugging Roy along, he wanted to get back to bed.

"I think he's just tired," Roy told them as they made their way out of the office and Envy grunted in agreement. The others followed with soft chuckles.

"Oh wait, Envy," Riza said and the teen turned to look at her, she could see he was still tired, but smiled at him as she put something over his head and then pulled his hair from under it and then placed it over his forehead over the mark. It was a headband.

"So people don't stare," she said and Envy nodded in thanks and then continued to drag Roy to the door, and out to the court yard.

They walked across the grounds it was about five in the afternoon and everyone was heading home, and when they came to the front gate Envy caught sight of a prisoner transportation vehicle and the prisoner being put in after General Hakuro looked up and smirked at him.

Envy was filled with overwhelming rage to see Salvador smirk at him, saying 'I knew you were a little whore,' and Envy lunged at him. But luckily his hand was still in Roy's and the man had noticed his sudden anger and was able to grab him around the waist before he attacked the man.

Roy grabbed him and pulled him against his chest as the teen tried to get at the man who looked startled to see such a reaction before he was pushed in to the vehicle. Roy wrapped his arms around Envy's chest, resting a hand on his head and murmuring things into his hair. Envy stared as the truck started its engine and moved away, his breathing was erratic and he was shaking badly then it all caught up to him and he started sobbing. Roy turned him around and let him rest against his chest looking at the others a little lost.

"Why...? Why? I don't like it," Envy sobbed into Roy's chest and he hugged the boy, Riza gave a soft supportive smile.

"It's okay, we'll have it figured out in no time, come on let's go home," Roy said quietly and Envy nodded, but continued to cry the whole way home until he was in bed, Roy next to him. The others left them, assuring they'd be there at the first call if needed.

Roy sighed as he stroked the sleeping boy's hair, looking at his tear stained face, this had been a very trying day, but in the end it all worked, Roy had gotten notice that because of Hakuro's actions against him, he was leading in the run and would most likely be the next Fuhrer, it was a pity they couldn't celebrate, oh well, once Envy felt better.

Roy frowned in his sleep before he woke up, why was he feeling a draft? His eyes opened only to see the dark of the ceiling of his bedroom. Then he tried bringing his hands down to bring the blanket back up but his hands were stuck to the bed post.

"I see you're awake," a voice said and then there was a familiar hand on his chest. "I was thinking I'd have to wake you up a little more inventively, a little disappointing but that's alright," the hand traced gentle circles on his chest and then brushed up and down once before Roy watched as Envy climbed on top of him. He straddled the man, a knee on either side of his waist, his fingers continued to run over his bare chest. He was naked with a naked teen on top of him, now if he had known Envy like he did, he would have found this very erotic. But seeing those blood red eyes glowing down at him, those lips smirking in a completely unfamiliar, yet very familiar way. It was somewhat terrifying.

"Envy...what are you doing?" he asked and the boy blinked at him before he started laughing and then smiled seductively, something Roy's Envy didn't know how to do.

"Now Roy, I know it's been a little while, I thought for sure you'd know what we were doing," the boy said smirking. And Roy just blinked, this was so very weird, maybe he'd wake up soon and find out it was just a dream.

"No really what are you doing? I don-Ah!" he was interrupted as a hand gently brushed his member and then the boy went on his hands and knees and crawled up so his mouth was above Roy's.

"Hush, I want to have fun too you know," he whispered and then gently put his lips too Roy's who waited till Envy sat back up before speaking.

"But you've never done something like this before I think-" and he was interrupted again only by a snarl.

"It's always about you isn't it Roy Mustang? Humans are selfish so selfish to the point they won't let other humans do what they want, you're just being a selfish human Roy, Maybe I want to be in control, you ever thought of that? Of course not because I've never said anything, well there are a lot of things that I haven't said that you know nothing about, so just shut up and let me be," he snarled and Roy's mouth snapped closed, okay so more volatile Envy was in charge, best just to shut up and moan.

Roy's mouth opened again when Envy moved his body again, his lips trailed down his chest and his female entrance teased Roy's member as it brushed by and he let out a wanton moan as it did, Envy smirked and looked up and then did it a few more times, appreciating the fact that Roy's hand kept clenching and unclenching, wanting to hold him but couldn't.

"E-Envy!" he cried out when he pushed on him a little then pulled away, he moaned in frustration, his member painfully hard now and then he felt a tongue lap at him playfully before pulling back just as he bucked.

"Please! Untie my hands at least!" he begged and he heard the boy purr, and looked to see him watching with a smirk, and pleased narrow eyes.

"When you beg...it's so beautiful..." he whispered and Roy watched as he raised himself and then slowly lowered his womanhood over his member, making soft sounds as he did.

"Ah!" he let the small sound escape his parted lips as he seated himself on Roy's member, the man was in a trance as he watched the teen slowly start to move up and down, gripping at Roy's chest. That was the most erotic thing he'd ever seen and was still seeing, he was panting now, gripping at the cloth tying his hands back, he wanted to touch him, oh how he wanted to touch him. But he was afraid him might reach his climax before he had the chance he felt it now, coiling up like a snake, Envy was panting now too, moving up and down erratically, crying out more loudly and then he threw his head back and came, Roy's eyes were locked on the boy as he climaxed too, groaning and taking in deep breaths.

Envy moved off of the man, and then slowly crawled back to the top of the bed and untied Roy's hands, his arms were immediately around Envy and had him on the bed.

"Next time, I get to touch you," he hissed and then swallowed the surprised cry coming out of his mouth, it was a long battle of tongues and they separated, gasping, then Envy smirked up at him.

"It was revenge for all those times you lite me up like a Cretian candle," he said and Roy blinked then shook his head and kissed his forehead.

"I love you," he said falling to the bed, but keeping his arms around the teen, who smiled gently.

"I love you too Roy," he said before drifting off to sleep in the arms of his lover.


	22. Chapter 22

I miss the badgering...I really really do. :(

And for the record: NO Envy CAN'T get prego. I set it up so he has no uterus, but he does have ovaries, and no balls, only one urethra, and then a vajayjay and a PEN15 cause that's kinky. And I did mention earlier that he can't get prego...I just guess no one was paying attention. ~_~ sad day. Well anyhow...read on.

Find Me

Chapter 22: Forgiveness is divine

Envy woke up and saw the events of last night go through his mind and he gasped, oh my god had he really done that? Oh my god, oh my bloody freaking god! He'd practically assaulted his lover! Envy sat up fast, his hair flying around his face as he looked over to where Roy was, the bed was empty and Envy grit his teeth. Oh crap. He slung the covers off of himself and realized he was still naked, he turned red before he searched for clothes, he put on a shirt and shorts then went downstairs.

Roy was in the kitchen humming under his breath as he prepared breakfast, the only meal he could actually make without burning his house down, omelets, mostly because that's what he lived on for most of his academy days during exams. He shook his head, academy days, that sure was something else. He continued humming, took the omelets off of the skillet and put them on plates, that he put on the table then turned to the door when he heard a small cough.

"Good morning," he beamed at the teen who went red, and shuffled his feet his eyes flickered from Roy to anywhere else.

"What's wrong?" he asked and Envy bit his lip, and Roy set the skillet in the sink before coming over to him and brushing a few fingers across the soft cheek.

"You...you're not mad...?" Envy mumbled and Roy quirked an eyebrow.

"Mad about what?" he asked and Envy looked down.

"For last...last night..." he whispered and Roy stared for a moment before letting out a soft laugh and then tipping the boy's head up so he could kiss his forehead.

"Nope. Like I said, next time just let me use my hands," he said and Envy blinked before smiling slightly.

"O-oh, okay," he said and then Roy grinned and dragged the teen over to the table and pushed him down.

"So what did you want to do today hmm? Ed and the kids demanded to come by so we can celebrate properly, the others from the office are coming too." Roy said sitting down and Envy blinked at him

"What for?" he asked and Roy stared for a second.

"It's your birthday, remember?" he asked and then comprehension dawned on the boys face and he nodded.

"I forgot, I've been kind of preoccupied you know," he said and Roy smiled then placed a hand on the boys head.

"Yeah I know. And speaking of which, why didn't you tell me about what the man did to you? I could have helped," Roy said his eyebrows were furrowed and Envy smiled at him softly.

"I know, but I want you to be Fuhrer, Hakuro would have won if I'd told you," he said and Roy rolled his eyes.

"You're so dumb. You're lucky I love you so much," he said and then bent down and kissed the boy fiercely before going to his own seat and beginning to eat his omelet.

"Yeah I love you too, dumbass," Envy muttered his face red, Roy started laughing and Envy smiled, this was what he had, and it was the best thing he'd ever had in his life.

Roy watched Envy at the party, he was trying so hard to act like he used to but from time to time he would get snarky and sarcastic and then go red and apologize profusely to who ever he was talking to. Roy smiled sadly, if they couldn't reverse it, it would be a little difficult but at least it was entertaining. Though the one thing that made Roy feel very mixed about it was when Gracia and Elicia came in, Envy looked up at them, his eyes widened before he looked down at the ground with such a look of pain and guilt on his face any resentment Roy had felt for him vanished.

He didn't want Envy feeling that anymore, he had started a new life and had no need for his old memories, especially ones that caused him pain. But he was still a little upset at him for not telling him he was in trouble.

Roy sighed, the fact that Envy hadn't said anything was probably his fault anyway. Envy really didn't tell him anything as it was, probably because the boy didn't want to worry him. It must have been that characteristic that made Roy appreciate him and love him.

Roy smiled, yes he loved the one who murdered his best friend, and was once one of his enemies, but that wasn't all Envy was, he was also a kid, even when he'd been a homunculus he'd still been a kid more or less, with little understanding of life and humans. Probably why he was so jealous, but now he was a human and he could learn it was a second chance, now Roy was a little torn about whether he deserved the second chance, but if someone like him had gotten several, he guessed it was okay.

But that was behind them now, he needed to focus on the future with how things were going, he would probably be the next Fuhrer, and Envy needed to get the stone out of him, that's what Roy needed to think about. He would do everything he could to make those two things happen. And he would but first, he would have some of the cake Gracia had made for Envy's birthday.

"Hey, So Al is coming from Xing in a few weeks, he and Mei should be able to come up with something," Ed said from his seat on the couch, holding onto Trisha who was trying to climb off of him and go over to Envy who was also sitting on the couch while Nicholas was playing with Elicia.

"And that's important because?" Envy asked, a little like his old self, but Ed ignored it. Envy sighed at himself before rolling his red eyes and taking the girl into his arms, Ed sighed and then grabbed his drink from the table.

"Because they know Alkahestry, they might be able to do something about the stone without doing something to you," Ed said and Envy nodded slowly his lips pursed.

"What?" Ed asked and Envy made a few faces that Trisha found amusing and started giggling, Envy smiled down at her then tickled her sides for a moment before looking back at Ed.

"Mei...is that little Xing girl isn't she?" he asked and Ed nodded and he made a face again before going on, "I manipulated her pretty badly...are you sure she'll want to help me?" he asked and Ed smiled.

"Mei's pretty open and understanding, she had to be in order for Al to fall in love with her," Ed grinned and Envy nodded but didn't feel so sure about it Ed noticed and frowned.

"What is it?" he asked in that tone that Envy recognized as his 'Dad voice' Trisha must have recognized it too because she stopped playing with the older boys hair to look at her daddy with big eyes.

"I don't know...I guess it's just hard to confront all of the things I did well not _all_, obviously but some of them..." he said and Ed smiled.

"You'll be fine, I can guarantee that Roy will be the hardest you'll ever have to face," Ed said and Envy smiled Roy sure had been difficult, the stubborn man. But all was well now, he would be alright, he hoped, for a couple of weeks.

Roy thought it would be fine, waiting for Alphonse and Mei to arrive, what he hadn't put into account were Envy's severe changes in mood. One moment he was close to normal the next he was either very pissed off or very horny and usually after those he was very guilty. But more often than not they ended up having 'make-up sex' though Roy didn't really think it was necessary, he went along with it anyway, because he enjoyed it too. Though he didn't enjoy Envy's misery at his own dislike of the whole situation, the boy was a walking gloom cloud most of the time. It was relief when the two from Xing arrived at the Mustang residence.

Ed and Al immediately started speaking to each other about possible solutions. Mei however came over and gazed at Envy who was clutching onto a pillow out of nervousness. They stared at each other for a long time, Envy going more and more red with each passing moment before he lost it and spoke.

"Your hair is different," he said, noticing that she no longer had her hair in the loose braids but instead had them up in loops.

"And your eyes are freakishly terrifying," she said in response and he went red then pushed the pillow over his face.

"So I'm a freak who got carried around in a jar by a ten year old, can we move on?" he mumbled into the pillow and moved it down a little to see the expression on her face. She had her arms crossed and looked to be deep in thought. Then she nodded.

"Okay you are different, though I still do not like you for manipulating me," she said and Envy blinked and nodded.

"I'm sorry..." he mumbled and then she looked at him in surprise.

"Really?" she asked and he nodded, then she smiled.

"Oh okay, Alphonse-kun! I will work on him now!" she said and the Al stuck his head through the door.

"That's good, you're amazing Mei," he smiled and she practically gushed with happiness and then Envy noticed the little black panda on her shoulder also gushing.

"You still have the cat?" he asked and Mei looked back at him and nodded.

"Of course! Shao Mei is always with me," she said and Envy grunted, he'd meant she was still alive but oh well.

"Okay Envy," Al said walking into the room, "Get down on the floor and we'll see what we can do." Envy nodded then laid down on the floor, being sure to take the pillow with so he could put his head on it.

"What do you have in mind?" he asked and Al kneeled next to him then clapped his hands, he'd also retained that ability along with Roy.

"Just check things out, we're not going to try anything until we have a solid idea of what's going on," then he placed his hands on Envy's chest who gasped. It felt like cool water was running through every one of his veins.

It felt good in an odd sort of way, at first but then his mind was bombarded with memories from his first life, and most of them were not pleasant. He cried out softly at first before he grabbed his head and tried to get away, Al's hands were gone in seconds and the images stopped coming but there were still the ones he'd just gotten, running around in his head, reawakening emotions and sparking new ones.

Blood on his hands, a smirk on his face, screams in his ears, bloodlust in his heart.

Envy turned over and got on his hands and knees and heaved, getting sick all over the floor, he clutched at his gut where overwhelming feelings of guilt and hatred for himself consumed him. He let an anguished cry escape his lips, and then his arm went weak and he fell to the floor missing the puddle of sick.

"Envy!" someone cried in worry but all he did was start to sob and then try to grab the floor, trying to grab something to keep him anchored and away from his anguish. It hurt. He didn't like it. No, no. He was sorry, he didn't mean it. Someone came over and moved him away from the spot of sick and held him in thin arms and cooing at him. His eyes opened and he saw Mei petting his head and shushing him, he reached up a shaky hand and grabbed her shirt.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean it! I'm sorry!" he cried and she looked at him in surprise before taking his hand then brushed his face and hushed him again telling him he was okay, he wasn't at fault. She didn't blame him. He sobbed into her chest, why did it feel so good for her to say that?

It was several hours later, Envy was laying down on the couch his head in Mei's lap one of his hands clutching to hers almost desperately, she was playing with his hair with her other hand as he dosed on and off. He had wanted as much human contact as possible and since he'd been attached to Mei she'd just stayed with him.

"How is he doing?" Ed asked and Mei looked up at the blond with a small smile, brushing hair from his face, touching the marks on his forehead.

"Better, I think," she said and Envy's eyes opened briefly before falling closed again then she brushed his forehead again. "I think the transmutation caused some of his more horrible memories to come to mind," she said and there was a soft grunt from her lap, Envy agreed.

"So we try Alkahestry next?" Al asked from the foot of the couch his arms crossed and his eyes narrowed. Mei rolled her dark eyes then a couch pillow was tossed at him, he caught it and put it back on the couch.

"Yes we do, it should not hurt him. And Alphonse I suggest you keep your jealousy in check, it is unattractive," Mei huffed and Al went pink.

"Jealousy is bad..." Envy mumbled tiredly from her lap, they all looked at him he hadn't spoken since Mei had calmed his mindless apologies.

"Bad Envy-san?" Mei asked and Envy nodded, his eyes falling closed again.

"Envy is Ugly..." he whispered and everyone picked up the double meaning, not only was Envy calling the actual emotion ugly, but he was calling himself ugly as well. Before anyone else could say anything Envy was asleep again and someone else was in the room walking over to the couch.

"Now I regret ever saying that..." Roy said putting his hand on Envy's head then brushing his cheek with a finger.

"Yeah well what you gonna do?" Ed said walking over to Fury who held his two sleeping children, they'd spent the day with Uncle Roy who knew how to wear them out, along with many lower ranked soldiers who wanted to make good impressions on the future ruler of the military.

"Make it up to him I suppose," Roy said then he leaned over and took the small form off of Mei's lap and held him close to his chest then he excused himself for a moment and put the boy up to bed before going back downstairs to discuss things with the others.

"So what did you deduce?" He asked when everyone was seated in the den, the children asleep in the spare room.

"That the stone has direct relation to his memories," Al said immediately, and Roy nodded, "And he's incredibly sensitive to them, we're not sure which ones he saw but he apologized profusely for it," he said and Roy nodded again then sat back in his chair.

"Do you have any ideas?" He asked and Al nodded then looked over at his fiancé who smiled back.

"Mei should be able to do something with Alkahestry, and then we can do something about the stone with our new combination of Alchemy and Alkahestry," he said and Roy nodded that was reassuring.

"Good," he said and then gave a small sigh of relief as long as things worked out, he sure hoped being Fuhrer wasn't this stressful. Okay that was a pipe dream, but still.

It was much later in the evening when Roy went back upstairs, Mei and Al were sleeping on the couch while Ed was asleep with the kids in the spare room.

Roy had grabbed something else on his way upstairs, and was hoping it would make Envy feel better. He opened the door quietly and saw the teen asleep and spread out over the bed his limbs taking up more space than they needed. Roy smiled and chuckled softly he moved a strand of hair from his sleeping face and then bent down and kissed his forehead in the middle of the triangle. Then ran a finger down his jaw and pulled back, tired red eyes were looking up at him glazedly.

"Roy..." he muttered and the man smiled down at him then picked up a hand and kissed it before sitting on the bed.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" he asked quietly and Envy frowned a little and shrugged, then pouted and Roy knew that meant he wanted to cuddle. Roy brushed his cheek again with a finger.

"I have to change before I get in bed, but first I have something for you, it was going to be your birthday present but I didn't find it in time," he said and Envy sat up rubbing his eyes.

"You didn't have to, I don't need anything from you, I have enough," he said groggily, and Roy smiled, he knew that was what he was going to say.

"I know, but I wanted to," he said then pulled out the object from his pocket and placed it in Envy's hand, the boy blinked down at it a few times then he picked it up between his fingers and looked at it more closely. Two small metal plates on a ball chain, one had the Amestrian Military coat of arms, while the other had words on it that made Envy's breath catch in his throat.

Hughes, Maes

Lt. Colo.

He stared at it until it got blurry, tears streamed down his face as he was pulled to a uniformed chest and fingers stroked his hair.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cry," Roy said into his hair, holding him tightly. "I just wanted you to have a piece of him too," he said and Envy sobbed again before pulling away from his lover.

"W-why? I killed him while looking like Gracia! He would hate me! I don't deserve to even be with you because you knew him!" he sobbed putting his hands to his face along with the dog tags.

"No he wouldn't. Maes wouldn't hate you. You did what you had to do. I think that if you had been...raised, for lack of a better word, differently, you would have been different. Your Father ingrained in you that humans were below you, I think Maes would understand that. I want you to have this so you remember that you are who you want to be now, and Maes wants you to take care of his family in return. And he wants you to take care of me too." Roy said quietly and he knew Envy had heard because he started sobbing harder, leaning into him one of his hands clutching onto his uniform, he wrapped his arms around the teen and kissed his head. He was pretty sure it had made Envy feel better because the next time he saw the dog tags they were around the slim neck.


	23. Chapter 23

Reviews = love = happy writer = faster updates. ← easiest math ever.

Find Me

Chapter 23: Nightmares

Al and Mei worked on Envy several more times, some results were better than others, but the more they worked on him the more withdrawn he got. Many times after Roy got home he'd see him on the floor or couch either with Mei or by himself, one arm wrapped around his legs while the other clutched onto the dog tags at his neck. Mei would rub his back or persuade him back onto her lap and try to get him back to sleep since he was usually better after a few hours of rest, but recently he had started having nightmares.

Roy was awoken by a kick in the shin, his eyes snapped open and his arm was in front of him ready to snap, but then he took a deep breath and remembered he shared his bed now and looked over at Envy who was making soft whimpering noises in his sleep as he thrashed around. Roy gently placed a hand on his arm.

"Envy..." he whispered and the boy thrashed more violently at the contact he grabbed an arm before it hit his face.

"Envy!" he said more loudly and eyes snapped open and the boy gasped and then he caught sight of Roy looking down at him holding his wrist and he started sobbing.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry I didn't mean it! Please! I'm sorry!" he cried trying to get away and Roy could feel him shaking. He pulled him close and was surprised when Envy's other hand was on his chest pushing him away.

"No, No! Please! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!" he cried shaking his head, and Roy saw how terrified he looked and he shushed him.

"Hush, it's alright," he murmured but he continued to be pushed away by the apologizing and sobbing boy, and Roy realized exactly what memory he was reliving. The one in which he died.

"Shh, I'm not going to hurt you, I swear," he whispered into an ear and Envy stopped struggling, but continued to sob for a long time after, Roy held him as long as needed, they would get through this, no matter what.

Envy sat at the kitchen table arms crossed glaring down at the surface, this sucked. A lot. He had been taking a shower as per usual, it helped make him feel better. But then he'd caught a look of something in the mirror. He had stopped and stared at the mirror a moment, it looked kind of like a smudge, so he'd used his towel to wipe at the mirror but nothing happened then he looked down at his thigh. It was a circle the color of dried blood, it didn't really look like it but but Envy knew exactly what it was, he was sure that it was his Ouroboros. He'd taken in a shaky breath and tried to wipe it off but it wouldn't smear. This wasn't good.

Now he sat at the table trying to think of what to do, and what might happen, would he go back to his old terrible ways once the whole tattoo was there? Would it be impossible to change back? Would he be fighting himself for the rest of his life? He didn't know and he didn't know how to tell Roy, he sighed and then stood up and moved out of the kitchen and went to the door, he stepped out and walked. He didn't want to be there when Roy got home, he didn't want to think right now, everything was so hard! Why did it have to be so hard?

He turned a corner sharply as he grit his teeth together trying not to cry, he was so easily brought to tears it was disgusting. He snorted and shoved his hands in his pocket trying to ignore the feeling that everyone knew what he was trying to hide underneath his clothing, the pants and shirt and headband. But no one was looking at him.

He snorted at himself he was being stupid, not like it really mattered anymore right? He was practically two people trying to be one but just couldn't find the right middle ground. He kicked a pebble nearby and heard it hit some metal, he looked up to see the Military Cemetery. He stared at the wrought iron gates for a moment before entering. He walked along the rows of heads stones barely making a sound on the grass and turning down one of the rows and coming to a stop in front of a white headstone.

He stared at it for a moment and then the tears he had been trying to hold in spilled over and stream down his face as he collapsed to his knees in front of Maes Hughes' grave.

Why? Why? WHY? He didn't want to be here anymore, he wasn't helping anyone, he was distracting Roy, he was even making the all gentle Alphonse _jealous._ He didn't like this at all, he wanted it all too stop.

"Why couldn't it have been you?" he weeped, bending over himself and gripping the dog tags under his shirt, "Why wasn't it you?" he cried, it would have been so much better if Hughes had come back he knew that, but he didn't understand why it was him standing there.

"Because I didn't need him," Envy gulped in surprise and turned to see Roy kneeling down next to him.

"W-what do you mean?" he asked through his tears and Roy smiled at him, taking his closest hand into his own.

"I miss Maes, and I do wish he was still here, but I'm glad you came back instead. You see if Maes were here all he would have done is told me what a fool I was, and made me see the error of my ways, but he wouldn't have shown me what you did." Roy said his thumb caressing Envy's hand softly while the boy looked at him in wonder.

"W-what?" he asked, tears still falling down his face, but he was too transfixed on Roy to really care.

"You let me forgive myself," he said and Envy bit his lip again, before he started bawling again, throwing himself at the man. Roy fell back in surprise before wrapping his arms around the sobbing teenager. He held him and soothed him until he fell asleep at the foot of the grave of the man he murdered in the arms of that man's best friend, he felt so undeserving, but it was also so_ right._

Roy carried Envy home, he had been lucky, he'd seen the boy leave the house and had decided to follow him out of curiosity, and it seemed to have been a good idea. He entered his house to be greeted by Alphonse and Mei both of whom were looking excited and said they'd figured it out, they knew how to do it, they just needed time to prepare, Roy was relieved to hear that and was able to go to bed with Envy in his arms with a lighter load than he had in a long time.

The next morning saw a groggy Envy sitting in the middle of a circle, he rubbed his eyes again and watched as Mei placed the last knife in the floor and Roy gave a final flinch. His poor floor.

"Remind me again why I had to be awake so god damn early." Envy growled and Al rolled his eyes as he stood from his final chalk line.

"It's only nine thirty, you'll live. And we need to see if it works first then it'll take three sessions, all about ten minutes but you need to rest in between and they can't be spread by too much time." Al explained. Envy stared at him blinking slowly.

"Can you repeat that...in Amestian?" he asked and Al sighed and shook his head in amused exasperation.

"Just lay down," He said and Envy nodded and did just that laying down with a sigh and a small mumble.

"Don't fall asleep now, you can sleep after we're done." he said and there was a small groan from the center of the circle. Al chuckled then he looked over at Mei who nodded they both placed their hands on the circle.

The transmutation sparked to life and Envy gasped in surprise, it didn't hurt it was just surprising, he felt the warmth from before recede slightly, and then it was over and he felt exhausted. He groaned and felt a bit nauseous but not terribly so.

"Come on you can lay on the couch," Al said and Envy felt himself have an arm around his shoulders and his own arm slung around a neck. He mumbled a bit pathetically, he didn't want to move, the floor was just fine, but as he was lowered to it, the couch was nice too. The next second he was out.

Al shook his head in amusement, then pat the boy on the head, he wasn't bad really, just had the short end of the easy stick.

Envy was awake three hours later and looking at the food on the kitchen table droopy eyed, he picked up his fork and let it drop back down to the table top.

"Why am I so tired?" he moaned and Mei giggled as she put a plate of Xingese food in front of him.

"Alphonse-kun said it's because we can't use the energy from the stones, he uses some of his own too, but it's safer to use yours because of the Alkestry." she said and Envy nodded staring at the food in front of him he poked the chicken with his fork.

"Oh," he said and Mei giggled then threw her arms around him hugging him from behind, Envy hummed tiredly.

"Is that Mei's cooking I smell?" A voice said entering the kitchen, Mei smiled at Al over Envy's shoulder.

"Yes you do!" she grinned and Al blinked at Mei who was grinning at him, Envy was staring at the fork in his hand vacantly.

"Uh you okay there Envy?" He asked trying not laugh Envy looked up at him and shrugged.

"I'm just tired..." he said and Al smiled then pat his shoulder.

"Eat then, you'll feel better." he said and Envy nodded before taking a bite, it took several bites before the taste registered.

"Wow...this is good. Mei?" he looked at the girl who was sitting at the table next to him. She looked at him with a smile.

"Yes Envy-san?" she replied and Envy blinked before he remember what he was going to say.

"Can you teach me to make this? It's really good and I'm running out of new foods to make for Roy," he said and then Al's eyes widened.

"Uh-oh," he said and then there was a squeal and Envy was almost thrown to the ground as Mei impacted with his side.

"OF COURSE!" Mei squealed, almost bursting with enthusiasm, Envy grunted with wide eyes.

"Oh my," he said and Al and Mei started laughing.

A few hours later after Envy wasn't feeling as tired, he was in the circle again, glaring at Al because the boy had made him put down the new book Roy had brought home, he wasn't too happy about that but would live.

"Okay, lay down," Al said and Envy pouted at him, and heard a snort from the door way, Envy looked over to see Roy smirking at him, he stuck his tongue out. And Roy just grinned bigger, Al shook his head.

"Honestly you two are like kids," he mumbled as Envy lay on the ground then he smirked himself.

"Hey at least I make the old man feel young again," he smiled innocently at his lover who rolled his eyes.

"At least I'm not bratty." he sighed almost whimsically. Envy blinked at him before shaking his head.

"I would love to rise to the occasion of rebuffing your taunt my love but I have a philosopher's stone to be alchemically removed from my body," he said just as whimsically, Roy laughed then turned to leave.

"Okay okay, I'm going to go finish some paperwork." he said with a wave, Al grinned at Envy.

"You know I'm glad you and Roy worked things out, I don't think I've seen him this happy before," Al said and then envy went pink.

"No, it's not cause of me it was..." he trailed off into mumbles growing more red, Al chuckled and Mei grinned at him.

"Oh just get on with it you weirdos!" he pursed his lips in embarrassment and the two others laughed before taking their places and nodding to each other as they began.

Envy felt the cool tingle of the transmutation move over his body, the warmth receded even more moving towards the center of his body. He gasped as he felt something clench, and then there was a yank on his consciousness and then he fell into darkness.


	24. Chapter 24

You all did a fabulous job reviewing I'm so proud! Bu unfortunately...only one more chapter after this.

Find Me

Chapter 24: True Forgiveness

"Envy?" Al called, at the prone figure lying in the middle of the circle, he was supposed to be tired sure but not that tired, the second time was supposed to be easier actually.

The teen turned over and groaned Al frowned, he didn't feel any fluxes in the transmutations, he shouldn't be this out of sorts.

"Fuck..." Envy breathed and Al's brow furrowed deeper, the teen wasn't really much of a swearer, that was more Edward's department.

"Envy?" he asked again, and then the teens' head whipped around to look at him, black eyes flashed red as they glared at him. Al took a step back in shock.

"Who the hell are you?" he snapped, and then frowned, wait he did know who this was, but...this he was supposed to be metal...wasn't he?

"What are you doing out of your shell?" he smirked, and Al's eyes narrowed, this wasn't Envy...it was _Envy._

"That was a long time ago Envy, all of that, along with Homunculi, are history." he said and Envy's eyes narrowed dangerously as he sat up on his knees.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" he hissed and Al couldn't help but let the corner of his lip quirk up into a smirk.

"You're a human now," he said and then Envy's eyes widened for a moment then his lips pulled back and he snarled.

"You liar!" he snarled and then took a flying leap at Al but was tugged back by a hand that grabbed the belt loop at the back of his pants. Luckily he wouldn't have gotten far anyway his legs collapsed under him before he managed to take a step.

He fell backwards on top of a smaller body and was pulled off by Al, then he was forced to kneel down and his wrists were grabbed, after he was reoriented which took longer than it should have, he glared up at the blond.

"Let go!" he demanded and Al shook his head, before he looked over at Mei who was rubbing her butt, he smiled at her and she blushed.

"That wouldn't be wise, you need to calm down and try to remember everything that happened," he said and wasn't too surprised when Envy just glared at him and snarled quietly as he tried to free his hands.

"Hey I thought I heard something, is everything okay?" Roy asked popping his head through the door, his eyebrow raised in wonder but he wasn't able to think on it as Envy lost it.

"YOU! YOU BASTARD! I'LL KILL YOU! YOU STUPID FUCKER! LET ME GO! I'M GOING TO MURDER HIM!" Envy screamed struggling as hard as possible, trying to get free so he could get his hands on the man, who inadvertently ruined his life, who'd stepped back in surprise.

"Envy calm down!" Al said trying to get a better hold on the flailing teen, but it was hard and ended up having to pin him down by sitting on his legs and holding down his wrists to the floor.

"GET OFF! HE TOOK IT ALL AWAY FROM ME! IT'S ONLY FAIR I GET TO DO THE SAME TO HIM!" he screamed louder, and gasped for air, in that time Roy had managed to make it over to them.

"I wish you wouldn't," he said quietly, then he bent down on his knees at Envy's head, "I wouldn't be able to go on if you took it all from me," he said and Envy glared up at him upside down.

"Good!" he hissed, but then was surprised when a hand was placed on his cheek, he was too surprised to even try biting him.

"I couldn't live without you, now that I have had you in my life I can't imagine going on without you," Roy said and he watched as black eyes tinted with red widened dramatically in surprise.

"W-what are you talking about? I-! Don't you remember you asshole? I killed your best friend! While looking like his wife!" he declared, but he still sounded more surprised than boastful.

"I know, and I had my revenge, and I gave my forgiveness. Now I can continue living, moving forward. With you," he said and Envy's eyes flickered frantically searching Roy's face for a trap of some sort, he was so absorbed he hadn't even noticed that his wrists weren't pinned anymore, but Al was poised just in case.

"N-no! What are you talking about you dipshit! There's nothing between us! Nothing..." and then he remembered that first time, the first time they were together, and then so many other times after that. What were these? They didn't feel like his memories but he just knew they belonged to him. His hands came up to scrub at his face. No what was this? This human feeling overwhelming him? Guilt, yes for saying those awful things to Roy and about Mr. Hughes. Regret and shame too.

He made a small sound of discomfort, this wasn't right, he was supposed to be dead, that was why he'd pulled his stone out of himself, he didn't want to feel these things, these _human_ emotions.

"No..." he whined, pushing the palms of his hand to his closed eyes. He felt fingers brush his forehead then a hand rest at the top, on his hair.

"Envy, I'll let you up if you promise to behave," Al said sounding kind, Envy's lower lip moved out into a small pout. He was feeling very tired now that he thought about it, and from the looks of it, he couldn't do anything about his situation. He really had no choice but do as they said, dammit.

"Whatever..." he muttered, still covering his eyes, Al frowned at him before getting up cautiously, he looked at Roy who was still kneeling at Envy's head looking at him with a mixture of emotions on his face, concern, frustration, wariness and a little bit of fear. Envy moved his hands away, and placed them on the floor, a look of despair on his face as he attempted to push himself up and failed, he was really tired. Roy caught him by the shoulders easily, then moved closer so he was leaning against him. Envy frowned at him as the man helped him stand and get unsteadily to his feet, but once on them he pushed him away, feeling disgusted with both himself and Roy.

He did try to move forward on his own, but he couldn't get far, he stumbled into Al who caught him by instinct. Envy growled in frustration and disgust and anger.

"Roy can help you to the couch so you can lay down." Al said helping him stand again and Envy frowned as he felt a hand at his elbow.

"No." he said and Al frowned, "I don't **want** _his _help." he said and the hand disappeared. Al looked at him slightly shocked, Mei appeared at his side looking equally shocked.

"Why ever not?" she asked looking at Envy then at Roy who had a blank face, hiding any hurt he may have felt from the statement.

"Because it feels weird when he touches me!" Envy snapped, and Mei blinked in confusion, Al frowned and Roy let an eyebrow quirk.

"If it bothers you, I won't touch you," Roy said and Envy clenched his jaw and furrowed his brow, he had said it, he didn't want Roy's help, but he didn't say he didn't want to be touched, honestly, it felt...well nothing less than wonderful, the places on his head that he'd touched earlier and his back and elbow, they all radiated with Roy's touch. He didn't dislike it, it was just so weird, he was unused to it.

"Mm," was all he said frowning still and Al sighed looked over at the General who shrugged his unreadable mask back on, and that worried Al a bit, he hadn't used that in a long time, this had to be bothering him.

"If I'm of no use then I will go back to work," Roy said indifferently, moving past them, brushing Envy as he went, their hands touched and Envy didn't even feel as his own hand tried to grab Roy's but he was out of the room before he could even snag a finger. Envy glared down at his hand, what had that been about. Tch.

"Come on Envy you should lie down," Al said, seeing the whole thing as he grabbed the teens other hand and then taking him along to the living room. Mei was behind him just in case, her hand on his shoulder.

"Whatever," Envy whispered his other hand fisted in frustration, he knew what it was, he knew exactly what this feeling was. But that didn't mean he had to accept it or like it.

He plopped on the couch, and groaned, pouting slightly as Mei put a blanket over him, he rolled his eyes, and kicked it off.

"Why can't I 'rest' in a bed, they're more comfortable," he said and Al smiled, at least he was being reasonable.

"Because you can't sleep too deeply yet, just rest, and the couch will make sure you're not comfortable enough to sleep deeply." he explained Envy frowned.

"Why can't I sleep?" he asked and Al smiled, either he was being obstinate or he was actually curious, he figured it was a little bit of both.

"If you get into too deep of a sleep it could settle something inside you and we can't have that, it wouldn't be good for when we try to remove the stone." He said and Envy snorted.

"Whatever, now go away and let me 'rest'," he said mockingly then flopped over onto his face. Mei and Al looked at each other before going back to the room to look over their formulas to see if they'd made a mistake.


	25. Chapter 25

Cha 25: Finding End

Roy sat in the dining room, his paper work untouched, he glared at the opposite wall. Why? Everything had finally been looking up, today he'd gotten a call telling him indirectly he'd won the candidacy it wouldn't be announced until tomorrow, but he'd finally won, this being due to the fact that he'd said he'd use the stones as special cures in hospitals, training Alchemists to use them for good and for the people. And Envy was supposed to be better by tomorrow, but now he didn't think that would happen. This Envy knew about it all, about them, about what they were to each other, for each other and he felt everything the guilt and regret but it was _Envy_ and he wasn't stable. He was still that childish lost little homunculus.

He sighed and stood he wasn't going to get anything done right now, he walked out of the dining room and past the den where Mei and Al were working, they didn't notice as he went into the living room. His face fell slightly as he looked upon his lover, he was frowning in his sleep and gripping the armrest, Roy walked over to the couch and kneeled next to it his hand was at the edge of the cushion, he didn't know if he should touch him despite how desperately he wanted to.

He briefly wondered if this was how Envy had felt before, when Roy had hated him, when he wanted to be accepted by him so badly, he wanted to be with him so desperately but knew he couldn't. Because it wasn't reciprocated.

Roy sighed letting his eyes roam over Envy's body from head to toe. His hair was loose right then spilling over the side of the couch like a black waterfall, his skin was as smooth and pale as ever, Roy looked at his furrowed face wishing he could smooth out those wrinkles, his eyes moved down his black clad arm to see a clenched fist, the same hand he'd touched earlier. He wanted to hold it and make him relax, he wanted his legs to be less rigid in their black jeans, he wanted him to be smiling at him, sweet and kind, like he'd have been if he'd been a real human, he scowled in frustration and gently placed his hand over the clenched fist. His other hand went to his face and ran it along the wrinkles in his forehead, trying to smooth them out as he gently pried the fist loose and entwined their fingers so he could lift the hand and kiss it gently before placing it back down. He sighed and stood with a last brush of his finger to Envy's cheek before turning and heading back to the dining room. He didn't notice the hand reach out for him again.

"Please..." a small voice said, he turned to see barely open glazed black eyes staring at him as well as the outstretched hand. "Please don't..." he whispered and Roy took a step towards him again. The hand grabbed his pant leg when he was within reach.

Roy kneeled down next to him again and placed a hand on his cheek, Envy made a face, like he knew he liked Roy's touch, he'd been dreaming of it, but he didn't want to like it. It disgusted him, that he craved this man's touch, that he needed it so badly. He turned his face away from Roy but into the hand. The hand brushed past his ear to cup his jawline while the thumb rubbed his cheek.

"Envy..." Roy said and Envy shook his head, the hand that had gripped his pants was now on his uniform top, his fingers tightened and pulled the man closer despite his dislike about knowing he wanted it. He felt a kiss being place to the top of his head, and frowned. Why? Why was this man acting this way, why did he...love him? He was awful, he knew he was an ugly embodiment of an ugly sin. He was a monster, unworthy of second chances and of this feeling that he shared with this man.

"I love you," he whispered into Envy's ear, who shivered as he felt the statement roll through his whole body, sending warmth even down to his toes.

"Why?" he said after a moment, and then a hand turned him over, midnight eyes gazed at obsidian.

"Do you really need an explanation as to why I do?" he asked back sounding somewhat amused and Envy frowned before huffing in anger.

"Yes, I do," he snapped, and Roy rolled his eyes then stood, he grabbed Envy's hand and then yanked his upper body up for a moment so he could sit down, then Envy's head fell on his lap.

"The first reason is probably because you're gentle," he said and there was a snort from his lap and a cynical black eye looked up at him.

"Oh yes, I do so enjoy slaughtering innocents oh so _gently_," he sneered, and Roy sighed, and placed a hand on the long hair.

"Do you really slaughter innocents?" he asked and he looked down at Envy to see him smirk up at him, but then caught his eye and his mouth closed.

"Yes!" he snapped then frowned, "...No...I only killed those who got in the way, actually that was Lust's job, she was the attacker, Greed was the defender." Envy said, a small light glittered in his eye as he spoke of his siblings, he missed them, Roy could tell.

"The Ultimate Spear and the Ultimate Shield," Roy said and Envy nodded absentmindedly.

"Yeah, and I was usually back up or reconnaissance or I carried out the...harder tasks," he said, smirking slightly.

"Oh like what?" Roy asked, a little curious despite himself.

"Like placing hints or evidence or stuff, or getting people to do what I want, one face can be disarming, and once someone is disarmed I can make them do whatever I want." he said and Roy nodded, he knew that, he knew that very well.

"And what did Pride do?" he asked and Envy rolled his eyes up at him.

"Did you ever really meet Pride?" he asked and Roy shook his head, not really, he was pretty sure they'd been in each other's precesses but that was about it.

"Well if you had you'd know he was the eyes and ears. Sloth was the worker, Gluttony was the mistake and Wrath was the pawn, Ironic huh?" he smirked and Roy nodded once, it was a bit ironic that the 'King' was actually a Pawn.

"I see, but you're still gentle," Roy said after a small pause and Envy frowned up at him, disbelieving.

"You still cared for your family. Tell me, how mad were you that I killed Lust?" He asked and there was a furious flash of fire in his eyes for a moment before he turned his face away.

"She wasn't strong enough," he said slightly muffled into Roy's uniform jacket and Roy grinned, he was right.

"Let's see, and then I love you because you smile at me every time you see me," he grinned down as he saw pink appear on the visible parts of the boy's face.

"Next!" he demanded and Roy laughed, beginning to pet his hair and gently run his fingers through it.

"You're sweet, and kind, considerate and sensitive, forgiving and calm, and very compassionate. But most of all you're mine," he said and Envy peered up at him, his gaze piercing.

"I'm really not, those are all things...the...the weaker me is." he said and Roy shook his head, running a finger down Envy's cheek.

"Not weak, but I think that without Father's influence, you would have been all those things, it was natural to you when you got your second chance if it wasn't what you were then it wouldn't have happened," he said and Envy blinked before looking away, rolling over, his hand clenched onto the butt skirt of Roy's uniform.

"Maybe, not like we'll ever know, and it doesn't matter, you hate me, you just love the face now, you hated it when I killed that man, but now you love it. This face is manipulating you," he said trying not to sound bitter and then he was turned over gently.

"No." Roy said and Envy's eyes widened as Roy's hand went onto his chest, "It was this heart, this _soul, _the one that belongs to you, and you alone, that is what manipulated me, what made me fall in love." he declared and Envy stared at him wide eyed for several heartbeats before he turned bright red.

"You're disgusting," he said, "I think I might puke..." he said turning his face away and placing his hands over it and Roy threw his head back and laughed.

"Okay," he said and Envy grumbled something into his hands, before turning his face into Roy's uniform again, Roy ran his fingers through the slightly tangled hair until it was smooth, before skimming his fingers over any visible pale skin he could reach.

"Why do you like touching me so much?" Envy asked, and Roy cupped his cheek and turned his face up.

"Why do you like being touched by me?" He asked back and Envy glared at him before huffing and attempted to cross his arms.

"I don't remember you being this congenial," he snorted and Roy smiled, he was pouting like a the child he was, it was pretty funny.

"People change, especially with help from others," He replied his hand caressing the young man's face gently.

"Yeah, well whoever helped you should commit suicide," Envy sniped, and the hand stopped moving. Envy's eyes slowly rolled up to look at the man's face and flinched when he saw the pain there.

"I couldn't...live on...if I knew I was the...reason you killed yourself again..." Roy whispered, his eyes shut tight. Envy swallowed silently, then slowly he raised his hand and placed it on the man's cheek. It felt strange...but also very...right. He sighed.

"I didn't mean it," he said and the midnight eyes opened, gazing at him like he was making sure what he saw was real. His hand moved up to set on top of Envy's.

"I know you don't," he said but didn't sound very convinced, and Envy felt the guilt pool in the bottom of his gut. His hand tensed slightly on Roy's cheek the man was surprised as he was pulled down to meet Envy's lips. It only took a moment for Envy to pull back and look elsewhere, panting and blushing.

"You're so cute," Roy snickered, and Envy glared at him, still blushing.

"And you're old." he said and Roy puckered his lips.

"Nu-uh, you're older," he replied pouting petulantly, and Envy's lip twitched before he turned his face back into Roy's uniform, and he started shaking. Roy was worried for a moment before he realized he was laughing.

"Oh? Laugh at me will you? I, Roy Mustang the all powerful Flame Alchemist of the State and future Fuhrer of the country of Amestris, refuses to be subjected to being the butt of a joke!" He declared and then Envy yelped and started dying of laughter as Roy's fingers danced over his sides and ribs.

Envy writhed in laughter rolling as much as Roy would allow, making sure he wouldn't fall off of his lap, at last Envy sat up, straddling Roy's lap and pushing at his chest as he laughed and struggled for air. Roy smiled, seeing him laugh after all this time was so relieving. He stopped tickling just so he could wrap his arms around the teen and pull him close.

And before either of them knew it, they were kissing, gently and tenderly, lips moving so slowly it was like a slow, sad dance. And then Envy pulled back and took in a deep breath, their eyes opened to gaze at each other, and then Envy's fingers went up to Roy's face cupping his cheek before his glistening eyes spilled, tears fell slowly down his cheeks as he brought Roy's lips back to his own, kissing him almost desperately, needing the contact, the reassurance that this was real and not some sick trick his mind was playing on him, a dream. He feared that if he awoke he'd be back in that cold dark room in Father's lair. It was hell compared to what he'd experienced here, what he'd felt and held. He didn't want it to end.

Never.

Roy seemed to sense this and didn't want to break away afraid he might hurt the teen, he knew at the moment he was very fragile. He kissed him back, just as desperately just as needy, to show him this was real, he was here, and under no circumstances would he let him go. Never again.

A cough from the door way had them jumping and breaking apart to gaze at the door where a giggling Mei and an amused Alphonse stood.

"Not to be a mood breaker, but we really should get the final transmutation done, and it wouldn't be good to waste any more of Envy's energy with uh...other activities." He said and both black haired males went pink, Envy turned his face away quickly to wipe away the tears, he scowled at himself for allowing himself to cry.

"Um, right," Roy said and gently pushed the teen from his lap. Envy got off and walked passed the others without looking them in the eye and straight into the den, he walked over the circle and then sat in the center.

"And here I thought it'd be hard to get him there," Al said amused, and Mei giggled.

"Who knew he just needed to be embarrassed?" she said and Envy scowled at them.

"Just get on with it!" he snapped and they broke out into laughter as they took their places, they reeled in their amusement, then looked at each other, focused and started the transmutation.

It felt no different from the times before but also different, Envy's eyes closed, all of the markings on his body disappeared.

Envy felt himself rescind and then meld, he was back to normal but also one with his old self, he could feel it all and remember it all but it wasn't as bad as before. The warmth reformed in his chest then moved to his stomach, he felt nauseous and then a moment later he was bent over and the stones came spilling out of his mouth.

He fell back onto his butt and let out a whoosh of air.

"Ew," he said, and then he felt arms wrap around his shoulders.

"Welcome back," a voice said and he smiled and leaned in to the warmth that was Roy. His head rested against his shoulder, his hands came up to be placed on Roy's arm.

"I'm back." he sighed happily he was back and he wasn't going any where ever again. This was where he belonged and nothing could take him from Roy. Which was good because he certainly had no intention of leaving and by the feel of Roy's arms around him, he didn't seem like he'd let him go. Envy smiled, he knew who he was, he had been found. He was Envy, Roy Mustang's lover, he was a friend to anyone that was willing to be his friend and good with kids. He was also a mass murderer but knew he had been wrong and was sorry and now he was going to help others to make it up as best he could. He was a human and he was in love, he had a second chance and was going to make it the best chance of his life.

THE END

God...it's so corny...someone shoot me in the foot...gotta change that. There may or may not be a sequel I have yet to decide. But i'm pretty sure there might be a little epilogue. So yeah... Okay whatever just review.

*points at review button*

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